Rick Riker is a nerdy kid that just can’t seem to catch a break at school with the hot girl or with the popular crowd. One day on a high-school field trip, he tries to make a good impression but ends up being bit by a radioactive dragonfly that gives him superhero powers and he takes on the moniker of…Dragonfly. Lou Landers is a man that barely has any time left to live but wants to extend his life into the realm of immortality but ends up giving himself superhuman powers and turns into the evil villain known as Hourglass. Riker must do everything he can to stop the Hourglass from sucking the life out of others and making it his own for everlasting life. Dragonfly must also try and get the girl.
I don’t get it. I just don’t get how these films keep on getting made or why anyone goes to see them when they do. Nothing about them is funny and the amount of time and effort put into these abominations just astounds me because they fail at what they’re trying to accomplish. Every joke is pushed out so forcefully that it makes them more awkward then anything. The physical humor just misses its mark every single time because it is so predictable and actually unnecessary. Other times they go on for way too long and end up becoming annoying. How anyone finds anything done in this film funny is way beyond my capabilities of understanding.
Superhero Movie mainly parodies Spider-Man with everything from the dragonfly bite (spider bite) to Riker (Peter Parker) testing out his powers by climbing up a brick wall. Throw in stuff from X-Men, Fantastic Four, Batman, and other random superhero films and that is how you get the title here. It’s really quite difficult to say anything else about anything here because there is a scarce bit of a plot which is a huge difference over most other spoof movies, but that’s not saying much. I don’t care if it’s modeled after superhero, horror, or disaster films…none of these stupid creations that end in the word “movie” will ever amount to anything because they aren’t funny. And when your main intention is to be humorous, then you’ve got nothing.
Random note which I found to be quite odd but there are two versions of the film included on this disc. The theatrical version runs just over eighty-six minutes while the extended version runs just under eighty-two minutes. Anyone else see the problem there? The situation is that the theatrical version has credits that run for about sixteen minutes meaning the actual film barely hits seventy. That’s just pathetic. And almost everything you see in the credits including gags, deleted scenes, outtakes, and more can be found in the special features included on this disc.
The film is shown in 1.78:1 Anamorphic Widescreen and it looks just fine. Colors are bright and details are crisp for a beautiful picture.
The film is heard in Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround Sound and all is fine here as well with the music surround the room while all dialogue can be heard well.
Alternate Ending – This ending is a bit more dramatic, but still nothing of much interest. (5:15)
Audio Commentary – Writer/director Craig Mazin sits along with producers David Zucker and Robert K. Weiss for the commentary track which is incredibly painful to listen to because you have to sit through the film again. They go through everything including coming up with jokes, what movies they were going to spoof, and how they got around some of the ratings guidelines to put in what they want.
Deleted Scenes – Here is a number of deleted scenes that simply run one after another and are mostly just thrown-out gags. If you can call them that because none of them are funny. (10:42)
Meet The Cast – Behind the scenes clips are shown while everyone discusses how it is working with others in the film. All of this is nothing more then everyone saying how great their fellow cast members are. Blah blah blah blah BLAH! (11:13)
The Art Of Spoofing – Everyone talks about what it’s like to spoof other films and bring them into their own. The crew and filmmakers go into how they come up with new ideas for spoof movies and the jokes that come from them. (10:35)
Theatrical Trailer
BD Live – A few things like interviews and scripts are available online. Nothing much.
Run from it. Avoid it like the plague. Hide in a closet to get away from it. Hell, gouge your eyeballs out if you’re forced to come anywhere near Superhero Movie, but whatever you do, don’t watch it. This is just God awful and I wouldn’t wish this viewing experience on my worst enemy. So much of my life was spent on this and I didn’t even laugh once. I kid you not. There was not a single giggle out of me or even a slight smirk. The special features didn’t help either because they simply prolonged the torture. Absolute zeroes can’t describe enough how my true feelings are here, but we don’t give out negative ratings. Oh my Jesus, I feel like I need to take a bath after watching all that.
Maybe they thought putting it on Blu-ray would enhance the quality of it all. But I can tell you that purchasing Superhero Movie on Blu-ray only means that you’re purchasing a high-definition piece of crap.
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Weinstein Company presents Superhero Movie. Directed by: Craig Mazin. Starring: Drake Bell, Sara Paxton, Leslie Nielsen, Christopher McDonald, Keith David, and more. Written by: Craig Mazin. Running time: 75 minutes. Rating: Unrated. Released on DVD: January 13, 2009. Available at Amazon.com
