The SmarK 24/7 Rant for World Championship Wrestling – October 11 1986

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The SmarK 24/7 Rant for World Championship Wrestling – October 11 1986

– God, it’s been a lean month for content thus far on WWE 24/7, and with only a few updates this week and a 33-minute episode of WCW at that, there’s not gonna be much new stuff from me, either. In case you were wondering.

– We start with Dick Murdoch doing a D-level impression of Ric Flair and pointing out that he drives a pickup because he WANTS to, not because he’s constrained by finance. He could wear Rolex if he wanted to spend his millions that way, but he doesn’t.

– So they FINALLY announce that Manny Fernandez has officially taken the money from Paul Jones and joined the army.

The Midnight Express v. Paul Garner & Art Pritts

Bobby tortures Pritts and hauls him over to the table, where Cornette FLICKS HIS NOSE. It just gets better and better with these squashes. Over to Garner, as they trade off on him and the Rocket Launcher finishes at 2:16.

– Over to Big Dust, who takes us back to Central States and Sam Houston’s quest to win the Central States title from senior citizen champion Bulldog Bob Brown. Again, I gotta say, for as much crap as people give Vince for, rightfully so, for his quest to wipe out the territory system, Crockett bought up relatively successful areas and purged them like he was the Others and they were Dharma so he could instill his group of Dusty Rhodes flunkies on top.

– JJ and Tully come out and note that they’ve got better things to do than going out to Kansas City to mess with old man Bob Brown and a shitty territory like that. And they wondered why all those territories died within the year? And we go back to the Dick Murdoch angle from earlier, as Ric Flair comes out to defend his rich lifestyle, triggering a Four Horsemen beatdown. Was anyone really clamoring for Flair v. Murdoch on the house show circuit?

– US tag team champion Ivan Koloff (as they FINALLY give the results of that tournament) talks about the glorious victory for the titles, no matter if they cheated the Kansas Jayhawks or not. Next mission: The World titles.

Brad Armstrong v. Randy Barber

Ah, Brad Armstrong. He had the look, the skill, and the hair, and no one could ever get him over. And yet his shitty brother makes millions in a team with Billy Gunn no less. He works a headlock on Barber and controls on the mat, then finishes with the Russian legsweep at 1:52.

– Ron Garvin promises to use his Mid-Atlantic title as a stepping stone to the World title. 1986 is the year that he becomes champion, bet on it! (Spoiler: Don’t bet on it.)

Tim Horner v. Bill Tabb

And here’s the other half of the future Lightning Express, oddly enough. David notes they’ve teamed up before and won titles, so I guess it’s not very odd after all. Horner works the arm and elbows Tabb down, then escapes a press slam and rolls him up for the pin at 1:11.

Ravishing Rick Rude v. Lee Peek

OK, the shitty generic music is so obvious of a ripoff that it’s GOTTA be dubbing over Sade’s “Smooth Operator”. Rude Awakening DDT finishes at 0:40.

– Rude joins us, as Jones notes that it’s a body money CAN buy. Now there’s a shoot comment for you. Rude gets a great line, saying “Don’t adjust your vertical, that’s just my abs bulging out of the screen.” And we go to the film of the US tag title tournament, where yes indeed, Jones offers Manny a briefcase full of money and the Bull turns on Jimmy Valiant for the cash. You know, they haven’t really done a good heel turn like that in a long time.

Tully Blanchard v. Tony Zane

JJ actually gets an atomic drop on the jobber and Tully puts him out of his misery with the slingshot suplex at 0:40.

– Back with the Lightning Express (and Brad’s godawful sunglasses) as they play up their former National tag title reign and challenge the Horsemen. Yeah, good luck with that.

Manny Fernandez v. Kent Glover

Flying burrito finishes quick. This sets up an angle with Ron Garvin, who comes out to question Manny’s motives and gets beat up by Rick Rude as a result. This would prove somewhat ironic because Garvin would do the exact same heel turn himself at Great American Bash 88, to much smaller returns.

And that’s all, another shortened week. Was Crockett just spending all his time and attention trying to get Sam Houston over in Kansas or something?

I’m actually finding it kind of sad because we’re almost at the end of Magnum TA’s career and he’s not even on these shows very much to enjoy him before he’s gone.