Quentin Tarantino says that this is bring it time. They’re trying to tie the highlights of the show to Inglourious Basterds with the editing of the last night’s highlights. Quentin thinks he knows who is going to leave. Really? Cause that’s got to be an obvious plot twist. Lil Rounds doing weak Bette Midler is never a crowd pleaser.
Ryan comes out and teases us with Miley Cyrus! Joel McHale is hitting the record button. Jennifer Hudson will return to the stage. The Top 7 are on the couch. Who will go? The judge’s save is in play for 2 more weeks. They might burn it if Anoop or Kris get the knife.
The Top 7 grace a magazine? Nope it’s just their Ford commercial. They’re getting goofy to J. Geils Band’s “Freeze Frame.” There’s little hype around the ad.
The Top 7 are now doing Flashdance‘s “Maniac.” What is Micahel Sembello done since this moment? The microphones appear to be live. Guess the producers realized that people weren’t too happy about buying tickets to a pre-recorded concert. Got to prove that the kids can really be part of the Up With People experience. Sembello hasn’t done anything that has brought him the same fame as “Maniac.” He will be touring this year. If you put a .com at the end of his name, you can visit his website. There’s a picture of him with Stevie Wonder. Stevie was a guest on American Idol. How people reconnect is amazing.
Ryan reminds us that the finale is over a month away. What did Adam take away from working with Tarantino? That Quentin chooses his songs before shooting the scene so the music can influence the scene. We get to see the Top 7 at the Premiere of 17 Again. Zac Efron is chilling with the gang. It’s another old man becomes a kid movie. Thomas Lennon swears this is a great film. We have to trust him cause he wrote The Pacifier, Herbie Fully Loaded Let’s Go to Prison and Night at the Museum. Zac is in the crowd wearing a stupid knit hat. Did they have snow storm in Los Angeles or is he hiding a bald spot?
Ryan dims the lights to build the bottom three. Allison Iraheta stands up to hear that special sauce review. She’s safe. Adam Lambert gets up. Simon’s crack about him sounding like the Rocky Horror Picture show is repeated. Adam’s not sure if that was an insult. It doesn’t matter. He’s safe. Anoop Desai is up. He talks about being comfortable on the stage. Ryan reminds him that he’s been in the bottom three for the last few weeks. Well it’s time for Ryan to walk across the stage to the Bar Stools of Doom.
Why must Journey be popping up in ever commercial? Damn the Sopranos for making them popular again. I won’t buy that phone to protest the revival of Steve Perry.
With Anoop in the bottom three, it’s probably Kris Allen that won’t be sweating on the barstools. He’s too cute to be sacrificed.
Ryan is surprised that Jennifer Hudson is on. Did you know she’s the only Idol Contestant to win the Oscar? You mean Justin Guarini did get an Academy Award for From Justin to Kelly? This is the first time she’ll be on the show since she was eliminated. The audio mix on “If This Isn’t Love” is rather shabby. She almost looks bored on the stage. She keeps picking at her ear monitor. Think she’s wishing she’d pre-recorded like Miley has done. She’s adjusting the microphone height. Did they rehearse this number with her? Or did she change boots before coming out? It ends better than it started. Would Simon use the judges’ save on her? She towers over Ryan during the chit-chat.
Ryan asks why Anoop seems frustrated on the bar stool. The guy thinks he did well last night. Paula is surprised that he’s in the bottom three. Simon says he thinks Anoop deserves his seat. Ouch.
Kris Allen gets up as a guy yells, “My sister loves you.” Lil Rounds also gets up. Did Kris make the right move to not play his guitar. Simon thought Kris was brilliant. Lil feels frustrated about judge’s choices of her material. She thought she did good. One of them is in the bottom three. Once more Ryan teases Kris about him taking a seat. But it’s on the couch. Lil is in the bottom three.
Danny Gokey and Matt Giraud stand next to each other. One of them will claim that last bar stool. Matt wishes he’d sung it like it was meant to be sung. Gokey was told that Simon was bored by the arrangement. Gokey’s wearing his glasses tonight. Randy and Kara thinks he worked it out. Matt Giraud is sent to the stools.
The bottom three of Anoop, Lil and Matt are brought to the center of the stage. Kara thinks it’s the bottom three. Paula says something nice, but Simon pesters her. Ryan will send one person back to the couch before Miley. Anoop is saved! He’s back on the couch and ready to give us the collegiate charm for another week.
How are they going to fake Miley Cyrus not actually being there? By keeping Ryan behind the judges. Miley does “The Climb” while covered in smoke and a glittery gown. The wife hates Miley’s whiney voice. In tribute to Tarantino all of her musicians are dressed like the Reservoir Dogs. Please tell me one of them is going to cut Ryan’s ear off. Can we call an 1-866 number to say which Idol judge needs an ear removed? Actually mine might be first to go. I can’t take this faux Faith Hill song. The wife thinks she ought be cut from Idol this week. We cut back to the judge’s table. There’s no trace of smoke in the studio. Ryan doesn’t try to chit chat with the vanished Miley. Simon says there is one he might use the judge’s save on and it’d be a surprise. Ryan asks if it’s Lil. Really?
Ryan declares it the moment of truth as Matt and Lil stand in the spotlight. Over 36 million people voted. Lil survived. Matt Giraud must sing for his life. Paula is pulling for him as he once more slog through the Bryan Adams. Who wants their professional career balancing on a Bryan Adams song? I don’t think even Bryan Adams craves such a fate. Ryan Adams really couldn’t deal with that stress. Matt is in overdrive on this final song. Kara and Paula are loving it. We might see them pull out the save. He sounds much better than last night.
Ryan hypes up this moment before turning to the judge’s table. The crowd is going nuts with a “save” chant. It’s like a penalty shot goal at a Stanley Cup Final game. Simon reminds Matt that he’s been in the bottom three too many times. But Simon declares, “Matt, it’s good news.” Then he doesn’t say anything else as the crowd goes nuts. Simon mentions two people will be going home next week and it’s Disco week. Nothing says fresh and original like Disco week. The kids bounce around in rejoicing mode like they won the World Cup.
In summary: Nobody went home. We didn’t even see a teaser trailer for Inglourious Basterds.
