I’d like to take the opportunity this week to respond to something that needs to be responded to. Not often do I like to devote much time in my columns to anything but the information at hand for movies and what not, but I felt this was something that required a bit more of a response then just my reply in the comment section.
That and I just didn’t have the time to write a full out column this week.
Hi everybody and welcome to this week’s edition of Making Movie History. It’s been a bit of a strange week. The weekend was overly too busy even though we had an extra day off to work with thanks to Memorial Day. Then there was ending up in the emergency room yet AGAIN although this time it wasn’t for me. Throw on top of that a pretty busy work schedule and my column unfortunately suffers the throngs of defeat and can’t get all of my attention.
Let’s not forget that only Up! and Drag Me To Hell are opening this week and that doesn’t give me much to work with. Well, I could have written a column all about the different Pixar films leading up to Up!. Wow, that sentence just sounds weird now but anyway. Still I have an idea for another and better column dealing with Pixar and all of its creations for a later time. Yeah I also could have touched on Sam Raimi (ewwwwww) and his return to horror after residing in the world of comic book movies for so long, but that also is being saved for a later date.
No, I wanted to respond to one of my readers this week and their comments dealing with my column from last week. Remember that one? If not, let me refresh your memory with an ever helpful link: Making Movie History: STOP…FUNDING…CRAP. All caught up now? No?
Go ahead and read…I’ll wait.
…ready? Moving on!
For those that don’t want to read it again or simply didn’t read it at all; I’ll give you the Cliff’s Notes version. It dealt with all of the movies of the Wayans’ family and those that have copied them. They have created a series of movies that mock other movies and popular culture. In my personal opinion…they suck ass. I have a right to my opinion and think those that read my column are generally interested in what I have to say that week on said topic. Perhaps they may agree with me and see a valid point to my argument. Maybe they won’t agree with me and have something to say against it. Others may find me to be a denius…a soitified denius (certified genius for the urbanically declined). Some may consider me to be an asshole with points that make no sense and with providing material that wouldn’t be fit to wipe their butt with if it was put into print form.
I may be a genius or an asshole or a know it all or intelligent or too opinionated or overly knowledgeable or maybe just a certified ass. But one thing I am not…is an elitist.
A poster who let themselves be known only as cpbasil had this to say in response to my column last week:
“why do you care if other people watch these movies? Nobody forces you to watch them. Nice try to be elitist”
It has been left grammatically intact for err…research reasons, but I want to touch on the subject matter in the comment. There are a few things to consider in the comment left for me by cpbasil and whether or not it’s true is something that needs to be decided upon by not me, but all those who read my work. I have people that I know in real life who discuss my columns with me from a negative and positive standpoint. There are people each week that leave me comments or e-mail me to inform me what they think of the words that stemmed from my mind and fingertips. But cpbasil’s kind of stood out to me and I have no intention on insulting them or degrading them. Hell, they are allowed their opinion and I find nothing wrong with what they said. Yet the words said to me did strike my fancy. So let’s take it one sentence at a time shall we?
I don’t care if other people watch those movies whatsoever. The fact that I advised people to stop funding them is because it was humorous to me and also had a bit of a serious meaning behind it. There is so much money wasted in Hollywood on movies like this that aren’t even really movies at all. All they do is take ideas from tons of other films and make fun of them in not so humorous ways. What an original concept eh? Not using a single original idea and literally stealing all they can from other movie franchises and throwing in the plots, characters, music, and so much more just so that they can ridicule them.
I know what some of you might say to my defamation of the “Mock Genre” (using the word “genre” very loosely), and that’s that the horror genre does nothing lately but remake after remake. Sure those aren’t original ideas and yes I may still love a lot of those movies, but I’ve let it be known many times how much the lack of creativity disgusts me. But these mock movies take it about ten steps further by not doing remakes at all but stealing (yes, there’s that word again) from multiple movies and other things in pop culture just to fill up the length of a movie. Some of them barely even make eighty minutes and that is very hard to even call a “movie” at all.
The more people watch these God forsaken pieces of crap; the more that will keep on being made and repeated and made again. You want to watch it? Then go ahead, but eventually these movies are going to make you want to rip your damn eyes out after Date Movie 86 comes out and it’s all that is on TV one night for you to watch. Your fault people…your fault.
How correct you are cpbasil. Nobody does force me to watch these movies and that is actually why I’ve only ever seen three of those mentioned in the column. Two Scary Movies and Superhero Movie are the only ones ever seen by these eyes and there are reasons. The first Scary Movie was seen because it was new and interesting and worth a shot. Scary Movie 4 was seen because I was dragged to it. Well, I saw half of it maybe because I slept through most of it. Superhero Movie was viewed by me because it was sent to me on Blu-ray by one Travis Leamons to review for The DVD Lounge. God, that shit just killed me.
Otherwise, I never saw a single one of the other movies discussed in last week’s column. Bits and pieces here and there were viewed, but never on purpose or with the intent of watching through the entire duration. I haven’t watched any of them because no, no-one does force me to watch them and I actually sort of refuse to do so. To me they are worthless pieces of crap that doesn’t deserve to be viewed by me. Not calling myself better than anyone, but they just aren’t my cup of tea…hell, not even close.
Son In Law
Leonard Part VI
April Fool’s Day
Napoleon Dynamite
She-Devil
Any Gamera Movie
Biodome
Moron Movies
Time Cop
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
Critters
White Noise
That is a small list of some of the movies I enjoy and could honestly watch over and over again. All of them are incredibly bad movies and don’t merit being watched by anyone, but I’ll continually watch them until the day I’m gone. Nobody is being forced to watch them with me and I never ask anyone to if they don’t choose to. Not all of them are downright stinkers and may provide SOME entertainment value, but by no means are they good movies at all.
An elitist? I think not.
Alright everyone, I’m going to stop boring you now with all of my ramblings, but I felt it was something I needed to and wanted to touch on. I in no way am trying to offend cpbasil here by dissecting their comment to me and hope they don’t take any of this in an insulting fashion. My intention here was to simply advise that nothing I say in my columns is meant to be taken in such a serious way and all of it is nothing more than my opinions and that’s it. If you choose to believe it then so be it. If you don’t want to believe it then that’s fine too. I hope cpbasil and others continue to read my work and even comment on it…whether positive or negative. Feel free to even e-mail me folks because I always like to hear from you.
Besides…this is my column and I’ll say whatever the hell I want.
Sorry, had to kind of throw that in there and be a bit of an asshole. HA! Have a great weekend everyone and I’ll see you next week with more tasty tidbits from the mind of Danny.
