After Josh Matthews welcomes us to the show and tells us that Batista and Kane have a match tonight for the #1 contendership for Taker’s title, Chris Jericho joins us for a few words. Chris lets us know that DX has no experience in TLC matches and while he excels at them just as he does everything else. After telling us that he is Wolverine, Jericho complains that he is being disrespected by not being placed in the #1 contender’s match tonight. Teddy Long pops out of his office to offer a response, but instead of giving Jericho what he wants, he puts Jericho in a match tonight with the Undertaker instead.
The Hart Dynasty vs. Cryme Tyme: Matt Striker lets us know that two buses full of friends and family traveled to this event to see Cryme Tyme in action tonight, so you know they’re going to lose. As usual Kidd starts off with JTG and after an extended sequence running the ropes Smith is tagged in and he pounds on JTG for a bit. Kidd comes back in for a quick cover and then locks in the side headlock. Smith is back in and hits a delayed vertical suplex and returns to the headlock before tagging Kidd back in the match. JTG is able to take advantage on a pause by Kidd to hits a leapfrog Fame-Asser and is able to make the tag to Shad as Smith also tags into the match. Shad takes control of Smith quickly and is able to nail his big shoulder block from the top rope but Kidd breaks up the pinfall and all four men join the fun. Kidd dumps JTG outside the ring, Shad then clotheslines Kidd out before turning right into a back suplex from Smith and that is enough for a three count and the win.
Meanwhile at the Hall of Justice, John Morrison and Teddy Long want to talk about how awesome the Intercontinental Champion is. Sadly they are interrupted by Vickie Guerrero who wants her boyfriend to get an IC title match. After some jokes and threats, Long reluctantly agrees but tells them both that it will be Escobar’s only shot at the title.
After a break, CM Punk, a paper bag and Festus join us in the ring for a pre-match promo. Punk introduces him as Luke Gallows and explains that his former condition was brought on by drug use and that Punk has helped him break those bad habits. The bag contains the WWE’s latest Jeff Hardy DVD release, and Punk bashes Jeff and the DVD. He then reminds us that the last chapter is the most important on the entire DVD, because it is the one where he beats Jeff and ends his career. The end of his promo gets interrupted by Matt Hardy and they briefly talk about Jeff some more before starting their match.
CM Punk vs. Matt Hardy: The match actually begins during a commercial break and as we return from that Matt seems to have been control until Punk wrenches his arm over the top rope and then nails him with a ddt. Punk goes for a slingshot clothesline but Hardy catches him and hits the Side Effect for a two count. Matt hits his second rope legdrop and signals for the Twist of Fate but Luke “Festus†Gallows interferes and the ref award s the match via DQ to Hardy. After the bell Punk and Gallows both give Matt a proper beating that is the highlight of the show so far for me.
After some commercials we get a recap of last week’s fat jokes at Mickie James expense, and Mickie joins Josh Matthews backstage for a few words. James says that sticks and stones may break her bones but words will never hurt her. She also says that she worked very hard to get where she is now and isn’t going to give up and leave because of juvenile pranks. Matt Striker just wants to watch Charlotte’s Web.
Batista vs. Kane: The winner of this match will face the Undertaker for the World title at the upcoming TLC pay-per-view. The two men stare each other down for at least a minute in the center of the ring before Kane grabs Batista by the throat. Dave escapes the grip and exits the ring where both men brawl for awhile before returning to the ring. Kane takes control in the corner but Batista rakes the eyes to escape and delivers an offensive flurry of his own in the opposite corner. A basic slugfest develops at this point with both men trying to gain an upper hand. Kane goes for the chokeslam again but Batista grabs the ropes and the ref forces a break. Batista goes for the Batista Bomb but gets back dropped and Kane looks for his own powerbomb attempt but Dave is able to escape as well. Batista starts to work Kane over again in the corner and the show goes to a commercial break.
As we return to the land of slobber knockers, Dave has Kane locked in a Boston Crab and we get a replay of Batista working over the leg of his opponent while we weren’t looking. Kane fights back to his feet and returns the action to a slugfest and Batista walks right into a big boot and a two count. Kane goes for his flying clothesline but misses and Batista nails a spear for a two count of his own. Kane hits a sideslam for two and then goes up top and hits his flying clothesline. Kane goes for the chokeslam but Dave escapes and goes for the Batista Bomb. However Kane escapes the move and hits the chokeslam for a two count as Dave barely gets his foot on the ropes. Batista slides out of the ring and Kane follows. They battle out of the ringside area and Batista hits Kane with something behind the barricade where it seems the ref (who is in the ring counting) could not see. Dave makes it back into the ring as the ref reaches 8 but Kane cannot recover in time to beat the 10 count. So Batista wins the match and the title shot by count-out.
John Morrison vs. Eric Escobar: This match is for Morrison’s Intercontinental Championship and it looks like John has some new pyro to go with his slow-mo entrance. After some gamesmanship to start, Morrison nails Ecobar with a dropkick to send him out of the ring. John nails a moonsault off the ropes and tosses Eric back inside the ring but before he can re-enter, Vickie distracts him and Double E is able to attack. Escobar continues to take advantage of this opening and brings John back inside and focuses his offense on the midsection of the champion. But Morrison makes a comeback and nails a flying kick before getting trapped in the corner. However, Escobar misses and attack and Morrison hits his springboard kick and then lands Starship Pain for the pinfall victory. After the match, Vickie gets in the ring and screams at Escobar, slaps him and tells him that they are done. After the break, we get more of their break-up backstage as they argue again so that Escobar can get a few insults in.
Chris Jericho vs. The Undertaker: Batista comes out to sit at the table with Josh and Matt to offer some more of that great commentary that he shared last week. Striker quotes some Van Hagar lyrics as Taker quickly gets Jericho backed into a corner and starts nailing him with punches. Undertaker hits Old School and then dumps Jericho over the top rope and stares at Batista as we go to a commercial break.
As business picks back up, Taker still has full control of the match and is looking dominant as he delivers a leg drop to Jericho on the ring apron. Batista distract the Undertaker as Jericho slides back into the ring and as Taker attempts to climb back in Jericho hits him with a springboard dropkick. Chris quickly brings things back inside the ring and continues his attacks. Jericho nails a missile dropkick for a two count and following a comeback attempt from Taker, another dropkick for another count of two. Undertaker fights out of a headlock with a back suplex and puts some steam into his comeback with his snake eyes, big boot, legdrop combo. Taker goes for the chokeslam but Jericho escapes and nails a bulldog and the Lionsault. But before he can cover, Taker grabs him by the throat and lifts him up for the Tombstone. Batista decides to get involved and chop blocks Taker and the match ends in a DQ win for the champion. After the bell, Jericho nails Taker with a Codebreaker and then leaves while Batista grabs a chair and pounds on Taker with it until the show ends.
