Monday Morning Critic – End of the Year Edition

Columns, Top Story

On tap this week:
— A little Diesel power to finish the year on
— The difference a year makes
And slightly much more!

It’s always amusing to look back during the last week of a year, if only to see how you got to where you are now by what you did the last 51 weeks. I’m normally not one to genuflect on the rampant stupidity or random shenanigans that make up my life but I do reserve the right to reflect at the end of the year.

And really, after all the changes, the best thing I think of about this year is a joke about being unemployed. A number of my friends, since it took me some time to find a job, accused of me of sluffing off on the job trail and instead spending my days trafficking the highest viewed websites on the internet instead of looking for work. And with the lack of success, I almost felt sometimes that might be a better idea. It may not have been a job, but it would’ve accomplished something more then some of the days I spent looking for a job or interviewing. But it did lead to a good comeback to that oft-repeated line of questioning.

“You know, I used to not look for work and instead surfed for that kind of stuff. But my computer gave me a blue screen of death at one point and I just started again.”

“Really?” my buddy responded.

“Yeah. Apparently once your watching Brazilian Fart Porn, your computer just stops and goes ‘You have reached the end of internet pornography. Get a job, slacker’ because it knows. Like how a dog knows if you’re a good person, your computer knows if you’ve seen too much porn for your own good.”

But then again, thoughts like these kept me out of the good colleges.

Random Thoughts of the Week

None for this week…enjoy your New Year’s Eve. Hug someone you love.

A Movie A Week – The Challenge

babylonad

This Week’s DVD – Babylon A.D.

I reviewed the theatrical release when it came out, and then quickly forgot about it. It wasn’t anything special, and I said so here. And it wasn’t something I wanted to see again, so I didn’t buy the DVD. But with several Blockbuster video stores going out of business in my local area, I swooped in like a vulture. On the last weekend of business they had a $1.99 for every DVD there, so I scooped up a dozen for under $25 before taxes. This was one of the, and the only reason I picked it up was because it advertised an “unrated” version. Intrigued, as the film was chopped up in the editor’s room to both the director and Vin Diesel’s chagrin, I picked it up. I figured that at two dollars for a movie, half as much as I spent on the ticket to see it in theatres, if I ever got around to watching it it’d be cheap entertainment.

The tale of a mercenary (Diesel) who shepherds a woman (Michelle Yeoh) and her ward (Melanie Thierry) from Eastern Europe to New York, the film is adapted from the novel “Babylon Babies” by Maurice Dantec. As the mercenary takes the two across a 6,000 mile trek in a dangerous world, he finds that what should be a simple smuggling job turns into something far more then he thought he was getting into.

If it sounds familiar, then it should because the film (and novel) take a lot of cues from Children of Men, which tackled a similar subject (man smuggles a woman to a destination) except it did it with some subtle social commentary. Babylon is a straight up actioneer, slimmed down at 100 minutes.

There isn’t much difference between the “unrated” version and the theatrical one, as it has some more profanity in it but nothing extremely noticeable. It’s nearly the exact same film, with some slight differences but it’s not a significant one. I can see where the film was aiming for, an actioned up version of Children of Men with a more epic tone and scale, and it’s a ballsy move. No wonder why it was cut down to a bare bones version at over 90 minutes, as there’s something more to be had that the unrated cut alludes to but doesn’t really get into.

Recommended if you’re looking for two hours to kill.

What Looks Good This Weekend, and I Don’t Mean the $2 Pints of Bass Ale and community college co-eds with low standards at the Alumni Club

Nothing new comes out this week. Have fun on NYE instead.

Do you have questions about movies, life, love, or Branigan’s Law? Shoot me an e-mail at Kubryk@Insidepulse.com and you could be featured in the next “Monday Morning Critic.” Include your name and hometown to improve your odds.