Inside Pulse WWE Royal Rumble Report – 01.31.2010

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Welcome to Pulse Wrestling’s coverage of WWE Royal Rumble. We have a three man booth tonight with Matt Striker, Michael Cole, and Jerry Lawler. The ECW World Championship is on the line on the top of the evening. Keep it to the Pulse and enjoy the Royal Rumble!

ECW World Championship: Christian v. Ezekiel Jackson

Ezekiel Jackson comes out with William Regal. The bell rings and they jockey for position. They lock up and Christian gets shoved with authority into the corner. Michael Cole describes the massive physique of Ezekiel Jackson. Christian goes behind, but Ezekiel plants Christian with a bearhug front slam. Jackson talks smack and Christian slaps him in the face. A chase ensues, but Christian catches Jackson off guard. Baseball slide connects and Christian goes for a springboard plancha taking Jackson off his feet. Back inside the ring, Christian ducks a couple clotheslines and slaps Jackson again. He pays for it with a hard scoop slam. Jackson nails some clubbing blows to the back and chest cavity. Pillar to post we go and back again, Christian’s back has to be hurting. Killswitch attempt, but Jackson blocks it. Military press attempt, but Christian sends him to the ropes and he chokes away. Another slap for the challenger and Ezekiel derails Christian’s attempt at a high risk move. Christian gets tossed to the outside and Regal tries to intervene, but the referee isn’t stupid and he ejects Regal. Jackson bashes Christian head first to the steel steps. Back in the ring, Jackson gets a two count. Jackson works a vice on Christian’s neck, but Christian goes for the slap. CHOKESLAM CONNECTS…BUT CHRISTIAN KICKS OUT! Clubbing blows to the back and Jackson goes for a stalling vertical suplex. Two count only! He chokes away at the ropes before hitting a body shot. Kidney shot on Christian and it seems to be a matter of time. Christian fights off in the corner and he goes for a sunset flip…COUNTERED to a double hand chokeslam! That gets a close two count and Ezekiel works a modified crossface. Christian comes back with a rapid fire slap! Clubbing shot to the back of the neck by Jackson gets another two count. Modified Full Nelson locked in, but Jackson works a kidney punch as Christian tries to get out. To the top we go and Christian blocks a superplex attempt. Flying shoulderblock connects, but Ezekiel is back up. He gets sidestepped and Christian catches him with a missile dropkick for two. Killswitch attempt, but Jackson blocks it. Christian floats over and he hits a sloppy Edgucution. Flying headbutt misses and Jackson lands a lariat for another close two. Chokeslam attempt blocked and Christian can’t hit the Killswitch. Backbreaker connects and it only gets two. Jackson charges…PELE KICK! Christian off the top…TORNADO DDT CONNECTS! The count goes to two! Trainwreck by Jackson levels Christian for yet another two count! Christian tries again for the Killswitch…countered, but Christian counters it again to a sleeper! Jackson rams Christian’s back and neck to the corner…but Christian engages in the Killswitch from out of nowhere to retain!

Winner: Christian
Grade: B+

What an opening match!

T-Lo gives Tiffany praise for such a great match to kick off the show. Cryme Tyme comes into the room and ask why they can only have one person entered. So, they intend on stealing a spot from the Great Khali. They entice Khali to kiss Tiffany and Runjin says that Khali says “No Dice, homeslice”. Oh God. This segment is lacking Santino. T-Lo breaks out a “Pants on the Ground” dance and the Miz walks into this. The Miz brags a bit and T-Lo says that he is in charge tonight and he books Miz v. MVP TONIGHT! We just got a bonus match and it’s NEXT!

Randy Orton sits in the locker room and Cody Rhodes tries to give him a pep talk. He will be there for Orton for his title match tonight. He wished he could say the same for Ted. All he’s talking about is winning the Rumble and beating him for the title. It seems that the seeds are being planted for either an Orton face turn, a DiBiase face turn, or a mega-heel turn for DiBiase.

WWE United States Championship: The Miz v. MVP

The bell rings and the Miz makes the first move. MVP turns it around and he levels Miz after a bit of keep-away for two. Snap suplex for MVP and he gets two. Miz gets pie-faced and we go pillar to post. MVP charges and Miz is ready. Miz charges and he gets backdropped. Back suplex gets two for MVP. Miz rolls out of the ring and MVP is in pursuit. MVP beats him to the punch and he drops him like a bad habit on the retaining wall. Back inside, Miz sends MVP back out and he goes on the attack. Miz backs MVP up against the ring apron and we go back inside. Garvin Stomp by the Miz and he lands a leg drop. Knee to the back and he is attacking anything and everything. Shoulder thrusts in the corner and he tees off MVP. He backs up and he hits the corner clothesline. Up top Miz goes and he hits a double sledge for a two count. Headlock applied and MVP is in trouble. MVP tries to get to a vertical base and is successful. He fights out of it and Miz gets caught with a boot to the chin. MVP comes at Miz and he gets dropped on the canvas. Clotheslines left and right and he gets his jaw jacked! It’s time to go BALLIN’! Playmaker attempt, bit Miz gets out of it. YAKUZA KICK LEVELS MIZ FOR TWO! Miz tries to evade, but MVP is after him. Miz drops MVP on the ropes and he gets back inside. MVP evades the clothesline but Miz can’t evade the shoulder tackle. Corner Yakuza kick misses and MVP counters the Skull Crushing Finale to a roll up for two. They trade rollups and Miz rolls out of the ring. Back inside and Miz gets an inside cradle for three!

Winner: The Miz
Grade: B-

The Miz brags and MVP drops him with the Playmaker! He leaves the ring in disgust.

Big Show walks in the hallway and he catches up with Chris Jericho. Jericho complains about Show’s new partner, the Miz who is like Chris Jericho in every way. Jericho says that he made Big Show bigger. If it comes down to Jericho, Miz, and Show, Show says he’ll throw both of them out. Here comes R-Truth saying that if he doesn’t, he will. Big Show takes his leave and R-Truth punks Jericho out.

Randy Orton walks and he catches up with Ted DiBiase. He says that he will be there for him. He asks where Cody is and we play up the same scenario that we had a few minutes ago. Orton decides that he doesn’t need their help.

WWE Championship: Sheamus v. Randy Orton

Wow, Orton is the obvious face in the match. Striker notes the WWE Title never changed hands in Atlanta. The bell rings and Orton stares at Sheamus, who taunts him. HUGE chants for Randy Orton. Headlock to start and Orton catches Sheamus with a dropkick before slithering away like a snake. Another lock up and Sheamus gets sent to the ropes. We get a break, but Sheamus shoves Orton who responds with an uppercut. Polish Hammer connects and Sheamus slams the arm across the knee. Orton takes a powder out of the ring and here comes the Champion. Uppercut connects and Sheamus works on Orton’s arm. Back inside and he continues the pressure on the arm. He picks Orton up and he goes for a running powerslam, but Orton gets out of it and he hits a chop block. Garvin stomp ensues and he pulls Sheamus away from the ropes. Cover gets no count. Orton continues the stomp and he works a modified leglock on the champion. Sheamus uses his other foot to kick Orton away. Sheamus sends Orton into the corner ring post and he repeats it with more authority. Spear to the corner by Sheamus. He follows up with a thrust in the ribs. He charges again and Orton is ready for him. He stomps on Sheamus’ hand and he drags Sheamus to the apron. He works the leg on the apron and on the ring post. Sheamus is down outside the ring and orton takes a break for a moment. Back inside, the fans are solidly on Orton’s side. Sheamus counters with a single-arm DDT and gets a two count. He works on the injured arm and Orton is in trouble. Orton tries to get out of it, but Sheamus modifies the move to a half-nelson. Orton uses his free hand to get out of it and we get into brawl mode! Orton kicks at the chest and follows with an European Uppercut. Spinning backbreaker…TWO COUNT ONLY! He goes for the Razor’s Edge, but Orton gets out of it and he kicks Sheamus outside the ring! Sheamus walks right into it…SPIKE DDT! HUGE CHEERS FROM THE CROWD! He covers…but Sheamus grabs the rope at two. Orton stares at Sheamus on the mat and he goes for the punt…Sheamus sees it coming and he takes a powder. Uppercut on the outside of the ring and Sheamus drives Orton into the steel post. Cody Rhodes attacks Sheamus and the referee has some words with Cody. RKO ON SHEAMUS! Orton goes for the cover and THEN…THEN…the referee decides to DQ Orton. Lame. The match was so good too.

Winner via DQ: Sheamus
Grade: C

Cody Rhodes tries to explain himself to Randy and he gets decked a good one. Orton goes apesh*t on Cody and Ted comes in to save things and Orton takes it to DiBiase! While this is going on, Sheamus is back up and he waits for Orton to turn around before taking his head off with the bicycle kick! Legacy leaves the ring as Orton is on the mat.

We get a video package for Mickie James and Michelle McCool.

Before we get our match, Michelle McCool is in the ring wanting to talk to the fans. She is here to inform us that Mickie James is nowhere to be found. We get more weight jokes. Right now, I would rather see Jillian Hall sing than to hear Michelle talk. Here comes Layla in the Piggy costume. Well here comes Mickie James and Layla learns the hard way that the fat suit does no wonders. She gets taken out and it’s time for the match.

WWE Women’s Championship: Michelle McCool v. Mickie James

Layla gets involved and McCool kicks her inadvertenly in the face. McCool turns around and she eats the MickDDT for the three!

Winner: Mickie James
Grade: NR (I just can’t give a bad rating for this)

Post match, Mickie hits the Chick Kick on Layla and she falls on McCool. The face divas from RAW and SmackDown come out with cake and Mickie James makes Michelle and Layla eat it.

Rey Mysterio walks.

Video package for Rey Mysterio and the Undertaker.

Author’s Note: Due to increased web traffic to Pulse Wrestling, we are experiencing a bit of a lag in getting live updates. Please bear with us.

World Heavyweight Championship: Rey Mysterio v. The Undertaker

The bell sounds and Rey plays catch-me-as-you-can until he grows balls and attacks head on. Taker takes offense and he launches him over the top rope. Rey takes his time getting back in the ring and Taker beats him to the punch. Mysterio tries to launch himself inside and he meets up with Taker’s fist and he goes back down. Taker sets Rey up for a leg drop and the last time the World Title changed hands was 29 years ago and it involved Dusty Rhodes. Rey moves too early and Taker makes him pay with a leg drop on the bottom rope. Taker sets up…GOOZLE! Mysterio counters and he dials the 619…DISCONNECTED! Tombstone attempt, but Rey counters! Rey kicks Taker and Taker misses the leg drop. Rey springboards into a big boot from the Undertaker. Rey rolls out of the ring, making Taker give chase. Taker is pissed and he lets Rey know it with a big boot. Taker extends the leg and he misses Rey and connects with the ring post. Rey takes advantage with a baseball slide to the leg. Mysterio hops and Taker looks like he is going for the Last Ride on the barricade! Rey grabs the ropes and he hits an Asai Moonsault AND TAKER IS BLEEDING FROM THE NOSE AND MOUTH! GOOZLE! Taker SLAMS MYSTERIO INTO THE BARRICADE HARD! Back in the ring and Mysterio kicks out. Surprised the match hasn’t been stopped with the blood. He picks Mysterio up and he drops him on his arm to the ropes. He goes for a choke and Rey tries to distance himself from him. Body shots connects in the corner. To the ropes Rey goes…Sidewalk slam by the Undertaker gets a two count. Rey attacks with the legs, but Taker levels him on the canvas. Jawbreaker connects and Mysterio catches the Undertaker with a splash. Taker sets up and Mysterio hits a dropkick. He drops the Dime…TWO COUNT ONLY! He tees off on Taker…ROLLING THUNDER CLOTHESLINE BY THE UNDERTAKER! Last Ride attempt COUNTERED! Drop toe hold…619 CONNECTS! Springboard into another 619! West Coast Pop…CAUGHT! LAST RIDE! Taker covers and that is that!

Winner: The Undertaker
Grade: B

Kane is with Shawn Michaels and he talks about his obession with Undertaker. He is here to tell Shawn that in the end, there is no light…only darkness. He leaves and Triple H comes in.

The Royal Rumble

Keep with me as I’ll do my best to keep things smooth.

Dolph Ziggler and Evan Bourne draw one and two. Bourne attacks with the legs and he humbles Ziggler. Ziggler gets close to eliminate Bourne, but Bourne holds on. Bourne almost eliminates Ziggler, but Ziggler hits the ZigZag! Bourne gets tossed, but he hangs on. Air Bourne connects and CM Punk comes out. Bourne attacks with the high knee and out comes Bourne AND Ziggler!

CM Punk takes the microphone to gloat about eliminating them and he says that everyone can be saved. IT’S CLOBBERING TIME! JTG comes out and he takes it to Punk. He jumps on Punk and he goes out. He goes back on the microphone and he says that no one has the dedication. The countdown ensues and uh-oh… The Great Khali comes out. Punk tries to convince Khali that he can save him and make him greater. He asks if Khali accepts Straightedge into his life and the answer is the chop of doom. The Vice Grip is locked on and we quickly…get Beth Phoenix? Khali is a bit confused and he is trying to be gentle with Beth. She gives him a liplock of death and out goes Khali. She takes it to Punk! Punk evades elimination and she gets nailed with the GTS.

Zack Ryder is #7. Punk drops Beth like a bad habit and he and Ryder go at it. Ryder gets the elimination and Punk has eliminated everyone so far. This is glorious. The next victim is Triple H. Or is Punk the victim? Trip’s entrance eats up at least a minute and he stares down Punk. Punk eats a knee smash and Trips eats a knee from Punk. Spinebuster connects and Drew McIntyre is slowly coming out while Trips berates Punk. Trips beckons McIntyre to hurry up. McIntyre eats a knee and Punk counters the Pedigree to the GTS, but Trips counters it to a Punk elimination! McIntyre takes it to Trips and Ted DiBiase is #10. Trips charges and DiBiase makes him eat a scoop slam. DiBiase and McIntyre team up on Trips a bit in the corner.

They continue the double team and John Morrison is next. He takes out DiBiase and he sets his eyes on McIntyre. DiBiase saves McIntyre and he works on Morrison. Dream Street is countered by a Pele kick and Morrison hits McIntyre with Starship Pain. Kane is #12. Kane enters with a clothesline. Everyone goes down in his warpath. Side slam to DiBiase. Double Chokeslam to Morrison and McIntyre and Trips eats a boot. DiBiase is close to elimination, but Trips saves him. GOOZLE and Trips eats a chokeslam. Cody Rhodes is #13. Legacy works as a team before Rhodes takes out Trips, McIntyre, and Morrison almost gets eliminated. Springboard…DROPKICK BY RHODES! He attacks Kane and thinks better of it. Kane goes after McIntyre and Trips almost eliminates Rhodes. Next up is MVP.

The Miz comes from behind and he takes MVP out with the belt to the back of the head. DiBiase levels Morrison with a clothesline and Kane & McIntyre go at it. Morrison saves Kane with a kick to the head. Legacy tries to eliminate Trips, but Kane saves as MVP gets helped to the back. Carlito is #15 and he takes out Legacy and dropkicks Trips. Legacy teams up and Carlito takes them down. McIntyre sends Carlito into Morrison. Dropkick to McIntyre and he fends off Kane. Backstabber to Trips and and McIntyre! DiBiase gets one as well. Morrison attacks and The Miz is #16. Carlito eats a Skull Crushing Finale. MVP comes in proper and BOTH MIZ AND MVP ARE GONE! Trips is in trouble as is McIntyre. Kane saves Trips again and McIntyre saves himself. Carlito hangs on and Kane is being double teamed on. Matt Hardy is up and he hits McIntyre with the Twist of Fate. Side Effect on Rhodes and DiBiase eats a boot. Kane eliminates Hardy and Trips eliminates Kane! Rhodes eats a spinebuster as does everyone else in the ring! Rhodes almost gets Pedigreed, but McIntyre stops it. Trips gets ganged on and Shawn Michaels is here to save the day!

Out goes Carlito! Out goes Rhodes! Out goes DiBiase! He tees off with McIntyre. Kip up! He ducks Morrison and Out goes Morrison! McIntyre takes it to Shawn and Trips is there to team with Shawn. McIntyre is gone! They stare down and John Cena is next! Cena evades DX and he takes it to them! Protobomb to Trips, feet hits Shawn! Double You Can’t See Me, BITCH! Attitude Adjustment attempt, but Shawn hangs on. Pedigree connects on Cena! SHAWN HITS SWEET CHIN MUSIC ON TRIPLE H! HE IS OUT! Shelton Benjamin is #20!

Benjamin takes Cena and Shawn down and he stalks Cena. Paydirt is countered to Benjamin being eliminated! Shawn tries to eliminate Cena, but opts for a backdrop instead. Yoshi Tatsu is #21. He takes it to Cena and Shawn with the kicks. Cena eliminates Tatsu. Shawn and Cena go at it and Cena hits a bulldog on Shawn. Both are back up and they slug it out in the corner. Big Show is #22 and Cena just crapped himself. Headbutt to Cena and Shawn and Cena again! Shawn makes the mistake….Cena tries to help Shawn and Cena sends Shawn over the top, but he hangs on. Show evades elimination again and Shawn is safe. Mark Henry draws #23 and the giants square off again. AND HERE WE GO! Show blocks a attempted pick up and here comes Cena! Henry bodyslams Big Show and Cena picks Henry up…but he drops himself on top of him. Chris Masters is #24 and he takes it to Shawn Michaels! Hard scoop slam connects and Masters tries the Masterlock on Show…HA! See you Masters. Henry tries to eliminate Show with Shawn helping. R-Truth comes in…OUT GOES BIG SHOW AND MARK HENRY! He takes it to Cena! He takes it to Shawn! The Stroke connects to Cena and Truth looks to eliminate Shawn. Jack Swagger is here and he takes out R-Truth! Swagger Splash connects on Cena and Shawn! Suplexes all around for Swagger and he rams Truth against the turnbuckle before powerslamming him on the canvas. Shawn attacks, but Swagger sees it. Shawn nearly gets tossed, but he is safe. #27 is Kofi Kingston and he is in a control frenzy! Boom Drop connects on Swagger. Kingston takes out Swagger and Truth takes offense of it. Kofi almost eliminates himself and Truth is gone!

Chris Jericho is #28 and he takes it to Cena. It’s Cena, Jericho, Michaels, and Kingston right now. with two more waiting to get involved. Jericho gets his attitude adjusted and Shawn hits a DDT! He goes to the top and he drops the elbow on Jericho. He tunes the band and Kofi beats Shawn to the punch with Trouble in Paradise! Cena dispatches Kingston! Codebreaker to Cena! Here comes EDGE! SPEAR TO JERICHO! SPEAR TO MICHAELS! SPEAR TO JERICHO! Edge has Jericho and he is GONE! Edgucator to Michaels! Implant DDT to Cena! #30 belongs to Batista and here is your final four!

Final Four: John Cena, Shawn Michaels, Edge, & Batista

Batista is an animal enraged. Michaels and Cena gets planted and he wants that title shot. Edge has a spear for Batista and Cena hits Edge with the Attitude Adjustment! Cena and Shawn are up and Shawn takes Cena out. Kip up! Atomic Drop! Chop! Atomic Drop! Chop! Scoop Slam! Scoop Slam! Shawn goes to the top! Elbow to Cena! Enzugiri to Batista and Shawn goes to the top a third time! Elbow to Batista and he tunes the band! SWEET CHIN MUSIC TO CENA AND BATISTA! Edge tries to eliminate Shawn and they teeter on the apron! SWEET CHIN MUSIC SENDS EDGE BACK TO THE RING! Batista eliminates Shawn…and it looks like that wasn’t planned. Shawn is pissed off…he takes out a referee. Charles Robison argues with Shawn and eats a Sweet Chin Music. Shawn is beside himself. He then walks up the ramp. Batista is the first up and he attempts the Batista Bomb, but Cena counters! Out goes Batista and Edge is lying in wait. Cena gets up…HE CATCHES EDGE, but it doesn’t matter! Edge tosses Cena!

Winner: Edge
Grade: A

Didn’t see that one coming. Fireworks explode around the Wrestlemania 26 sign and Edge celebrates his epic Rumble win. Here is your Order of Entry and Elimination for this year’s Rumble:

Order of Entry

Ziggler
Bourne
Punk
JTG
Khali
Beth Phoenix
Ryder
Triple H
McIntyre
DiBiase
Morrison
Kane
Rhodes
MVP
Carlito
Miz
Matt
HBK
Cena
Benjamin
Tatsu
Show
Henry
Masters
Truth
Swagger
Kingston
Jericho
Edge
Batista

Order of Elimination

Bourne
Ziggler
JTG
Khali
Phoenix
Ryder
Punk
Miz/MVP
Matt
Kane
Carlito
Rhodes
DiBiase
Morrison
McIntyre
Triple H
Benjamin
Tatsu
Masters
Henry/Show
Swagger
Truth
Kingston
Jericho
HBK
Batista
Cena

Show over.

The Final Pulse

The Royal Rumble scores a solid B with the Rumble delivering as it normally does. Everyone believed that Shawn or Triple H would win and few people expected Edge to return. The Road to Wrestlemania becomes tricky now because it was believed that we would get a Jericho/Edge feud with Shawn/Taker and Triple H/Sheamus. The direction over the next few weeks should be interesting to see where we go from here. Just like John Cena two years ago, Edge returns and wins the Rumble and he has his ticket to Wrestlemania punched. See you tomorrow night!

Paul Marshall has been with Pulse Wrestling since September 2007. He currently does a weekly WWE Column titled "This Week In 'E". Follow him on Twitter here.