Good evening gang, and welcome to the first installment of Unnamed ROH Recap!Â Yeah, I know, not a very catchy name.Â Or a name at all for that matter.Â Anyway, my name’s Kyle Sparks, and I’ll be the new Ring of Honor recapper here at the Pulse.Â A little bit about me, I’m married with a B.A. in Public Relations from Western Michigan University and live in Kalamazoo, MI, which puts me dead center between Detroit and Chicago.Â I’ve been a ROH fan since around 2004 or so, and have been a wrestling fan my whole life.Â My wife patiently indulges me in this habit and usually is game to come along for the ride, so hooray for her.Â Some of you might know me as a frequent contributor to Pulse Glazer’s columns, a sometimes ROH live event recapper when they come through Detroit or occasionally Chicago, or you might have most recently seen me post arguably the least accurate predictions EVER for the Over the Limit PPV.
Anyway, we’ll deal with having a catchy title for this weekly recap in the weeks to come.Â For the time being, just calling it an ROH Recap will do.Â This being the first installment, unfortunately we’re dealing with a lot of introductory nonsense, which hopefully won’t last long.Â So here’s the plan with how this is going to work.Â Because I don’t have DVR, I will not be doing play-by-play.Â There’s plenty of other places you can find that if you so desire.Â I’ll be trying to discuss the reason a given match is occurring (if there is any) any history between the competitors, my overall thoughts on a match and match time.Â Be forewarned, however, I do plan to use star ratings, I haven’t done a lot of ratings with them, and many of you may vehemently disagree with me on them.Â To that I say (1) That’s your right, and (2) I don’t care.Â As anyone will point out in a comments section, star ratings are completely objective, and I like to think I’m fairly in line with mainstream opinion.
That said, I don’t think there’s anything else that I can add to this already exceptionally long introduction, so here we go!
Your Hosts are, as always, Dave Prazak and Mike Hogewood.
**We open up to a recap from a few weeks ago of the Necro Butcher situation.Â For those unfamiliar, a Necro Butcher/Embassy brawl made its way from outside into the building, hit Guisseppe Di Lorenta (the time keeper) and was suspended.Â A couple weeks later, Cornette reinstated him with the added bonus of allowing every match of his to be a “Butcher’s Rules” match as long as he doesn’t go into the crowd and involve them or the officials or what have you.Â Decent recap, but it seems like we had a very similar package last week.
**After the intro video, we get dueling promos with “the man with rock star charisma, the man with movie star good looks, the man who’s singlehandedly bringing sleazy back to pro wrestling,” Joey Ryan and Eddie Kingston.Â They’ll be going at it tonight.Â Two quality short standup interviews from two guys great on the mic, and from there we go straight to the ring!
**Joey Ryan (w/ Prince Nana and Ernesto Osiris) vs. Eddie Kingston
Before we get started, let me just say that there are very few themes in ROH that are instantly recognizable, and Joey Ryan’s uber sleazy catchphrase definitely makes his one of them.Â Good stuff.Â Ryan jumps him right off the bell, and that goes about as well as you’d expect.Â The backstory here is that Joey Ryan took out the knee of Eddie Kingston so long ago, that I frankly forgot why.Â But Kingston’s been feuding with the Embassy for awhile and, again, I frankly forgot why.Â I’m a little shocked this hasn’t been resolved by now.Â After a pretty plain jane kind of affair, Kingston flattens Ryan with a lariat and Shawn Daivari hits the ring for the DQ.
Eddie Kingston def. Joey Ryan via DQ in 5:39 (**)
The Embassy hits the ring for the 4-on-1 beat down until Necro Butcher comes to save with a trash can and run off the heels.Â BUT WAIT!Â Jim Cornette comes out and it’s booking on the fly!Â We now have a tag match!
**Joey Ryan & Shawn Daivari vs. Eddie Kingston & Necro Butcher – Butcher’s Rules Match
Of course it’s MASSIVE beat down on the outside time to start this one off, as Butcher even threatens referee Paul Turner because, well, why not.Â He was in the way.Â Necro busts out the plastic bag over Joey Ryan’s head and all four men are brawling all over the place.Â Necro with an (inadvertent?) tribute to Bryan Danielson with an airplane spin on the outside, as Osiris distracts Kingston allowing Daivari to kick him low for the 3 count.
Joey Ryan & Shawn Daivari def. Eddie Kingston & Necro Butcher via Greco-Roman Nut Shot in 2:50 (8:29 total) (*1/2 for the whole affair)
Not much to be had there.Â The whole segment was kind of a cluster, the Kingston and Ryan match was paint-by-numbers, and the Butcher’s Rules match was too short to be anything of note.
**And cue the beatdown again, as we hit my least favorite pro wrestling cliche of all time.Â The timekeeper constantly ringing the bell to stop a beatdown.Â When in the history of ever has that worked?Â “Skullkrusher” Rasche Brown makes his way down to the ring, as the Embassy and Shane Hagadorn have each been courting him.Â Everyone clears the way for him to beat down Necro Butcher, and sure enough, Brown decimates the Embassy to a solid pop as the heels scatter.Â Despite that, the Kingston involvement continues on with no real end in sight, and really it sacrificed a feud that has already gone too long to be advancement for the Skullkrusher storyline.
**Kyle Durden interviews Steve Corino backstage.Â Corino takes umbrage with Cabana claiming that Corino cost him the TV Title, and promises Cabana that things are going to get a lot worse for him before they get better.Â Back at the pink studio, Prazak and Hogewood exchange predictions for tonight’s TV Title match, and we cue up a recap package of Supercard of Honor V.Â They instantly make the entire segment worthwhile by having dueling promos between Balls Mahoney and Prince Nana.Â See, Mahoney made a one-night-only return at the show in NYC to help Grizzly Redwood during a post match beatdown from Erick Stevens and the Embassy.Â Also highlights from Sara Del Ray vs. Amazing Kong, Eddie Edwards vs. Christopher Daniels, Colt Cabana vs. Kevin Steen, the Briscoes run-in on an epic Tag Title match, and of course, the World Title match between Tyler Black and Roderick Strong.
**Jim Cornette is backstage to address the situation regarding the multiple ref bumps in the main event at Supercard of Honor V, and essentially says, too bad, the decision stands, and announces the #1 contender for the next PPV, Death Before Dishonor VIII, June 19th from Toronto, ON.Â That man is Davey Richards.Â And I am personally very excited for that match.
**We have yet another recap of the Austin Aries/Delirious situation, with all of it’s Savage/Steamboat overtones fully intact.Â It’s the same video package we’ve seen for the last 2-3 weeks.Â From this, we segue via the pink studio into a recap of the Roderick Strong/Austin Aries situation from last week.Â Aries continues to be one of the most compelling character that ROH has got to offer, and it’s hard to have too much of him.Â The end result is an announcement that in two weeks, it’ll be Austin Aries vs. Tyler Black in a non-title match.Â Apparently we’re not going to get to see ROH on HDNet on Memorial Day.
**After the announcement, we have a backstage interview with Austin Aries about said match.Â Aries puts over how he’s pushing everyone’s buttons, as he continues to be the straw that stirs the drink, in his words.Â When he beats Black, he’ll have successfully screwed with the emotions and lives of both men in one fell swoop.Â “Now that’s real power.”
**Eddie Edwards(c) vs. Colt Cabana – ROH World TV Title Match
Super special ring announcing from Bobby Cruise here for this one.Â Eddie and Colt back each other into the corners early, and Colt appears to have his serious boots on tonight.Â Colt got this match due to his losing to Eddie in the first round of the TV Title tournament, because Colt is a babyface, and therefore an imbecile, and he chased Steve Corino.Â Chain wrestling early broken up by Eddie’s striking, and the story is immediately established.Â Or at least *a* story, as I realize I forgot to start my stopwatch.Â Well, crap.Â Solid back and forth match, and Hogewood does me proud by referencing “Flip, flop & fly,” as I wasn’t aware he knew about the existence of Dusty Rhodes.Â Colt locks in the Billy Goat’s Curse after a missed missile dropkick by Edwards cuing the Corino run-in which leads to dueling small package nearfalls.Â Corino distracts Cabana and the official to allow Edwards to hit a shinbreaker onto the belt and cinch in the Achilles Lock for the tap out.
Eddie Edwards def. Colt Cabana via Achilles Hold in (estimated) 14:00 (***1/4)
Damn solid match, good way to showcase the TV Title and show that Cabana can be serious, which we haven’t seen much on HDNet thus far.Â I’d hold it up to the best of the WWE free TV main events, and it’s better than most of them.
**Post match, Corino and Cabana have a short pull-apart brawl to further the Cabana/Generico vs. Steen/Corino angle.
Despite all the flak Cabana takes for being a “comedy wrestler” he’s got the wrestling chops to bring it as a serious wrestler when he wants to.Â The crowd is way into him, and he would be a perfect choice as a transitional champion.Â At very least, there’s no reason he shouldn’t hold the TV Title at some point down the road.
You know, the upshot to ROH’s taping cycle being so far removed is that more often than not, I don’t remember the results by the time the shows air.Â It’s almost like it’s really live!Â Well, except for the inherent confusion between taping cycles and changing of titles and trying to make that work with a live event schedule that isn’t really sure whether it’s keeping up with itself or with the shows as airing.Â But hey, I love the company, and want to see it succeed.Â I’d just like to see them speed up the tape-to-air time.
Again, kind of an average show tonight, the main event was pretty damn solid and I’d hold it up to most free TV matches, but the unfortunate thing is that by ROH standards, it tends to suffer by comparison.Â The Kingston vs. Embassy feud never seems to end, and a lot of people seem like they’re just spinning their wheels.Â Unfortunately, when you’ve only got an hour of TV a week, there’s only so much you can do.Â Still, for your money, it’s hard to find a better hour of wrestling on television.
Thanks for reading, and I only ask that you stick with me as my style evolves and I grow into this post, if the Pulse will continue to have me here.Â I’ve clearly never been a recapper before, and this is definitely something I’m working to improve every week.Â Thanks again, everyone!
Tags: Austin Aries, colt cabana, Eddie Edwards, ROH