Friday Morning Backlash- This Week in Dixie with Matt Hardy and Mickie James coming to TNA and RVD Returning

Columns, Top Story

This Week Down in Dixie

Dixie Carter Decided to sign Mickie James.

This isn’t a bad idea. Mickie has a real fanbase that apparently loves her. She comes off as really down-to-earth and likable too, despite the fact that everyone I’ve ever known who has had to work with her, quite a few people, says she’s horribly egotistical and genuinely difficult. But hey, when you have Nash and Hogan on the roster…

Seriously, not to get off on a rant or anything, but TNA had Awesome Kong. They had Cheerleader Melissa. They’ve tried out Sara Del Rey. Do they pretend to care about charisma or ability? I mean, ratings are their holy grail, according to Bischoff. So, Knockouts do the best rating when handled seriously. And they let Kong go. They let Melissa go. They don’t sign Del Rey. All we get is diva bullshit. Well, time for another diva. I wonder if we can get an awesome James vs. Victoria feud. That’ll be new and interesting.

Rob Van Dam is Back!

Heyyyy, didn’t they just strip the title off him because he’d be gone forever? Wasn’t the point that the title had to be defended every 30-days? Who’s the Champion now? The title hasn’t been defended since RVD left. Why in the hell exactly is he not the champion right now?

Hulk Hogan wants to give Matt Hardy the title, but will apparently settle for Mr. Anderson.

Fuck you, Joe; thanks for drawing our best buy-rates. Fuck you AJ Styles; thanks for being our face! Fuck you Daniels; how’s ROH? Fuck you Jay Lethal; lose that belt off of television!

The worst part? It isn’t even the good Hardy they wanna give the belt to. He’s an afterthought in Angle vs. Anderson because, you know, can’t push any guys who still might actually draw.

At least they don’t bring in anyone their fans actually want to see, like Shelton Benjamin. Then the world might end. See you all Monday. Read the return of Fire Joe Morgan if you’re a baseball fan. Bottom of the page first. Thank me when you’re done.

Glazer is a former senior editor at Pulse Wrestling and editor and reviewer at The Comics Nexus.