Pulse Wrestling Report: WWE Smackdown! 03.04.2011 — Edge, Alberto del Rio, Corre

Here we are with another new episode of Smackdown! This one is hyped as Taker’s big return to Friday Nights…anyone have the tally on exactly how many “returns” he’s had? Oh well.

Recap of Vickie’s firing, the intro, and Edge enters. The contract signing for Wrestlemania will take place later on tonight. He then casually explains what he’s going to do to Alberto come April. Shifting gears quickly, he’s talking about Vickie and implores the crowd to sing another rendition of “Goodbye,” but Drew McIntyre runs out, refusing to let it happen. Immediately, Teddy Long enters, telling the world that they owe Edge for helping get the loud mouth cougar fired. “Thank you, Drew” chants begin and…

Abrupt commercial break.

We’re back, and the bell rings. Edge charges, but the tables quickly turn. Drew stomps the bandaged arm of Edge, and continues to work on it in any way he can. They go deep into the mat, but slowly rise back up just for Edge to eat a boot and fall out of the ring. The announce table is the nest weapon of choice, as Drew states that he will “end Edge’s career.” The bandage comes off, and more damage is done. Outside of the ring again, but this time Edge is in control. He tosses Drew back in, climbs to the top rope, delivers a crossbody for a two-count. Spear! Ref counts one, two…but Edge pulls his shoulders up in a delightful twist. He decides on a tap out victory instead.

Grade: B-
A solid opener, albeit short. I loved the back and forth between the two and thought there was a healthy balance of power. And how can you not love that finish? Edge looks great as champion, definitely a little more developed for 27 than he was for 26, where the focus was primarily on Jericho (and rightfully so).

Commercial.

Rey enters…in a suit…looking like Cody Rhodes. The Rey-mask is off, and the odd, translucent Cody-mask is revealed. A recap of last week’s beat-down, and we move on to him shouting in the middle of the ring. He seems to have skipped his meds this week, because he seems borderline creepy. He will face Reyburt at Mania, and yet another mask-obsessed match is booked.

Kane backstage, and the Corre approaches. They remind him of his Buried Alive victory that was largely attributed to their involvement when Nexus was still cool. They suggest that he should probably beat Big Show tonight, and then go to defend their titles, or something.

Commercial.

Rematch for the tag titles. I’m pretty sure the copper souvenir penny belts are the same color as Slater’s hair. Santino and Kozlov out, and here we go.

J-Gabe and Santino start, J-Gabe immediately threatened by the Cobra. J-Gabe tossed out, and there’s some distance between the two.

Commercial.

Kozlov and Slater in the ring upon return, cheap shot from Barrett and Gabriel tags in. After a bit of a struggle, Slater tags back in, Marella back in and is the hot tag. He unleashes on Slater, J-Gabe tries to stop it, Kozlov attacks, Kozlov is thrown out, Santino goes for the Cobra, hits Barrett with it but Slater hits his finisher.

Grade: C-
Not a bad showing from any man involved. It’s upsetting that Santino and Kozlov looked so good once they had the belts taken off of them, as I feel they could really have done well as champs. They’re one of the few legitimate tag teams left, and not a terrible one if given real time and spotlight.

A recap of what first took Christian out, as it pertains to del Rio, and then a cut to him backstage. His portrait is being painted and he’s chuckling.

Commercial.

We’re back with Triple H’s promo about the Undertaker. We get to watch the entire video again, where he calls himself the “only true challenge you got left.” He’s determined to end the streak at Wrestlemania 27. But that’s nothing new.

Time for Taker’s rebuttal. I’m not sure about this new development of using “Ain’t No Grave.” It’s a great song, and he looks great entering to it. But it’s just not right!

Immediately, he assures us that the streak cannot be broken. He agrees with Trips though; they’re the last two legends, from an era that will not see the light of day again. A warning is given by the Deadman, and he promises that he will rest in peace. Ready, set, goosebumps.

Commercial.

A great little vignette for Sin Cara. I can’t wait to see what he can do.

Beth Phoenix is paired up with Rosa Mendes…wow, really? Still better than Joan though. LayCool out next. Michelle with the boot on, and a recap of their tension last week.

Beth and Michelle start out, but Rosa quickly tags in and attacks the injured foot. Layla tags in, gets the upper hand, and tags Michelle in. They’re already arguing, and Michelle misses wildly with a kick by her bad foot, making her fall to the ground. Both women tag their partners, and Beth charges. Layla is caught over Beth’s shoulder, slam, Michelle breaks up the pin, Beth starts setting up for Glam Slam but Michelle kicks her in the face and Layla gains the pinfall.

Grade: C+
Rosa aside, I really love all these ladies. These matches, I’m learning, are so fast paced  that I have to pause, type, pause, type, over and over and over. The growing tension between Michelle and Layla is fascinating to watch, but I doubt they’ll split them up any time soon. It sure will be fun to watch though!

The return of Tough Enough! And a commercial for proof. April 4th on USA…I’m excited for that. Here’s hoping they can resuscitate what it once was, and not have it end up like NXT.

Commercial.

Big Show enters. Kane enters. Finally, neither man is crushing a smaller wrestler and are evenly matched.

Show is already being manhandled by Kane, but a double clothesline takes them both down. At that moment, Barrett and the rest of Corre walk out, throwing Kane a chair. Kane uses it, and the match is over.

Grade: N/A

Okay, Pulse readers. What am I about to say?

  1. A.      Big Show and Wade Barrett swing dance in the ring after a healthy handshake.
  2. B.      Kane sends his fire straight onto Slater’s head, but no one notices as it blends in.
  3. C.      An immediate brawl takes place between all involved.

If you guessed, C, you’d be right!

But wait! Kane slams Gabriel with the chair after he was thrown up against the big red machine. The rest of Corre retreats after pulling Gabriel out of the ring.

Commercial.

Shawn Michael’s video package as it pertains to HHH/Taker is shown, again.

Swagger walks out, and Michael Cole might need to change his panties. Does Miz know about this? Michael Cole uses his self-important voice to grab the attention of the fans. He says there will be a guest referee at Mania for his match, implies that it will be Miz, provides the obligatory sports heat, and we’re done.

Commercial.

We’re back, with JTG in the ring. Swagger is already on top, throwing down the usual spots, Ankle Lock already locked in, and it’s over.

Grade: N/A

Another video package…this time for the whole Cena/Rock ordeal. I loathe that the Rock is making me watch anything remotely related to Cena. Still, “you yabba dabba BITCH!” is one of my favorite lines.

Edge walking backstage, he steals Alberto’s portrait and draws a mustache. Classy.

Commercial.

Teddy Long in the ring for the contract signing. Alberto is announced first, where he chit chats, and Ricardo sings the Mexican National Anthem. Thankfully, Edge interrupts.

“For the first time ever, in the history of Smackdown, can this be a contract signing that will not end up in chaos?” Ha, Teddy Long is so silly.

Edge starts out by saying that Alberto has no idea what he’s in for. Alberto responds by saying it’s his destiny. He then signs the contract, promising the end of Edge. Edge signs it next, and hands it to Teddy.

Edge says he can’t keep the promise of the signing not ending in chaos, and Teddy dashes out of the ring as Edge attacks. Crazy eyes, but Ricardo clutches on to his leg long enough for Alberto to attack. He threatens the Cross Arm Breaker, locks it in, and apparently Edge’s face is bleeding. Actually, his nose, as he’s a mess as the fight moves outside the ring. Alberto grabs a chair, places it on his arm, the crowd roars which means that Christian…runs out! Saves Edge from injury, and takes out del Rio. First outside of the ring, then in the ring, up the ramp. It’s madness! I missed Captain Charisma.

Credits roll.

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