The Rager – Battle of the Heels (Randy Orton, CM Punk, Michael Cole)

Welcome, my lovely yet suspiciously squishy Rageans, to yet another issue of The Rager. Today, we take a look at the best heels the WWE has to offer.

Opening Rage: Out of the Ring Heels
Since the inception of The Rager, one of the biggest issues The Rageans like to discuss is just who exactly is the best heel on the current WWE roster and I’ve decided to throw my two cents in. Of course we have to separate this into two categories: In-ring heels and out of the ring heels.
Lets start with out of the ring because theres a lot less to pick from. Basically the only two that I can think of right now is Vickie Guerrero and Michael Cole (if you think of more, feel free to remind me). At first glance, I would have to give this one to Cole, just because everything he’s done as of late is just so brilliant and he’s getting tremendous heat for all of it. However, how did he generate this heat? He went after the fan’s nostalgic favorite blast from the past, Jerry The King Lawler and quite honestly anybody would get booed for that. The impressive thing about Cole is that how he’s been able to maintain the heat and even elevating it. Now, sure Cole had heat prior to this just from being the Anonymous GM’s mouthpiece but it escalated every time Cole aimed his attention to Lawler. That being said, I will say Cole’s promos from this past Raw was complete weak sauce. The wacky JR impersonation and then later making fun of Lawler’s family photos was, dare I say, baby-town frolics wrapped in shenanigans.
Now lets turn our attention to Vickie, just on sheer longevity that she’s been able to maintain heat is impressive in itself and what’s even more impressive is that all she has to say is “Excuse me” and the entire arena erupts. Of course every one will point to the failed promo between her and John Cena where the crowd wouldn’t let Vickie to get a single word in. However, I will say that I believe the fans were a bit provoked by Cena but thats merely my opinion. Almost everything she touches is Heel-gold (overlooking Eric Escobar, of course…as everyone else should).

Top Heel: I gotta give the advantage to Michael Cole right now, the guy is on fire…or at least we all wished he was, which is also a good sign for a Heel.

Rage 2: In-ring Heels
Representing Smackdown we have…Alberto Del Rio. Anybody else know of any other big heels on Smackdown? Yeah, neither do…I mean, Cody Rhodes has promise but he’s just not there yet. Representing Raw, I’m narrowing it down to The Miz and CM Punk.
Alberto Del Rio really has taken off quickly in the WWE and has become Smackdown’s really only legit Heel and, as I stated in last week’s Rager, he’s hardly on just his own show. He cuts really great promos and really seems to get under the fans’ collective skins but then again, it can’t be that difficult to gain heat when you first attack the babiest of babyfaces, Rey Mysterio. Another thing to take into consideration is that probably he seems like such a good heel because he’s pretty much unopposed of heel-dom with a very face-heavy show. Like I said, Cody Rhodes needs to rise up as a heel and maybe Sheamus can move over to Smackdown to help. Anyways, being new and not really having much to compare to is Del Rio’s really only faults.
Moving right along to the current leader of The Nexus, we now have CM Punk. I must admit that for a while, I personally liked him better as a face. His turn in his feud with Jeff Hardy (although I love the matches) just annoyed me as well as his run with The Straight Edge Society. However, what turned me around was the 2010 Royal Rumble, in which Punk would systematically eliminate people left and right and he’d cut a promo as he was waiting for the next participant. I really think the Rumble is Punk’s cup of tea and I would love to see him win one. I loved him on commentary on Raw and I really hope he does that again anytime he’s injured or retires from in-ring action. I was a huge fan of the beloved Diet Coke incident, by the way. Punk having enough of Cena’s actions and attacking him was brilliant and I was very much hoping for a Wrestlemania match between the two. I was excited initially for his reign over the Nexus but now, it just doesn’t seem the same Nexus (seeing as how only 1 of the original members is still in it) but I’m not going to complain too much because we do get to see Punk vs. Orton at Wrestlemania. Now, did anyone notice what was wrong in my analysis of CM Punk? I said things like “I loved” or “I like” way too much to be talking about a heel. This problem is a good thing because I just think Punk is too entertaining in the ring for people to hate him, I mean, I was completely giddy at his performance in the Elimination Chamber. The only thing preventing him from being an anti-hero face is his mic-work and his ability to insult the crowd but that might not always work. I really believe that after a while, it won’t matter what he does, the fans will love him just like it happened with Randy Orton and WWE couldn’t help but turn him face.

On to The Miz and his changing of Miz-tory (get it? its soooo punny).This guy seems to be completely hated by anybody and everybody and I think its Miztastic (two can play the pun game…but nobody ever wins). He used to be the annoying little punk that basically reminded everybody that he was there but then become an afterthought after his promos. Winning the Money in the Bank changed that and everybody had to take notice that he really developed in the ring which caused everyone to notice more of his antics and mic-work. My personal favorite was the Christmas Carol and him posing for his holiday card. What really has impressed me, as I’ve stated in previous Ragers, is that it would’ve been so easy for him to get lost in the shuffle and be the forgotten man in the Cena/Rock rap battles but he forced the WWE Universe to take notice and remind us why he’s champ. His promos after attacking John Cena were brilliant and he didn’t need any cheap lines (unless you count him using other people’s lines and I’m Awesome) in doing so. The Rock fake-out last week was a good touch and even imitating Rock’s moves were a nice addition. The flipping of WWE’s logo seemed so brilliant of a move and yet so simple and elementary, I literally sat and said out-loud, “Duh, why didn’t I think of that?”

And the winner for Best In-ring Heel goes to…
The Miz!

Like I said, Del Rio needs to show a little more to become a top heel and CM Punk is just too fun to watch for me to hate him. Miz takes the cake and how can you say differently? Any guy that can make a little girl give you the death stare like he did automatically wins in my book.

Pop’s Random Thought
“You know how to shut that guy (Michael Cole) up? Just take a can of spray paint to that box he’s in so he can’t see.”

I hope you enjoyed my thoughts on this matter and by all means, I know I’m not the end-all be-all on heel-y knowledge so feel free to comment on anything I’m missing as well as who you think is the best heels in the business today. Hope everyone is having a great week and we’ll see you all next time around.

“Balls, balls,” said the Queen. “If I had them, I’d be King.”

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