Inside Pulse Wrestling WWE RAW Report – 04.04.2011: The Road to WrestleMania 28 BEGINS

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Welcome to Inside Pulse Wrestling’s Live Coverage of WWE Monday Night RAW!

We are LIVE from Atlanta, Georgia and Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler are calling the action tonight! Triple H makes his way towards the ring and the challenge is on to see if Triple H can keep me awake tonight. This is the most tired and beat up he’s been in his life. He talks about how he was extremely nervous. He even brings up wrestling him before, which is taboo since we weren’t supposed to. Triple H beat on him unlike no other man. They left it all in the ring at WrestleMania 27. Triple H can’t fathom what happened, but when Undertaker left the ring on a stretcher, he is a man. Triple H wants to say one thing and that is “thank you”. He tells Undertaker that he’ll be back and he’ll be waiting.

Jim Ross passes on a rumor that Michael Cole is here and he wants to face Jerry Lawler tonight. Jerry is prepared just in case.

Commercials.

We’re back and Jerry Lawler talked about his WrestleMania match and Michael Cole comes out to brag about his “tainted” victory. He brabs about being the new Mr. WrestleMania. Jerry Lawler asks him to shut his mouth. He says that a stupid computer beat him last night. He then says that he may have went down as the winner, but he’ll always be a jackass. Michael Cole asks Jerry Lawler for a rematch. He agrees, and Michael Cole made reference that he meant a rematch against Jack Swagger.

Jerry Lawler v. Jack Swagger

Lockup to start and Swagger takes the advantage to the corner. Lawler turns it around and Swagger is humbled. Swagger gets some corner thrusts and we go pillar to post. Swagger misses Lawler and it’s evenly matched. Swagger goes low and he suplexes Lawler to the mat. He drops his ass and it meets canvas. Cover gets two. Off the ropes, Swagger meets with a short-arm clothesline to regain control. Swagger goes for the Swagger Bomb, but he misses. Here comes Lawler rocking and jiving. Dropkick connects and he goes up top. Michael Cole goes to the apron and distracts Lawler. Lawler takes off after Cole and he gets a few punches in. Swagger applies the anklelock. Lawler taps out.

Winner: Jack Swagger

Swagger doesn’t release the anklelock, so he is disqualified and that upsets Michael Cole.

Winner: Jerry Lawler
Grade: C

Michael Cole bitches at Jim Ross and he squirts BBQ sauce on his attire. Jim Ross gets up and he slowly chases Michael Cole up the ramp.

Commercials.

We’re back and Michael Cole has returned to ringside to rip on J.R. and Jerry Lawler. Josh Matthews and Booker T are also on hand and they thank Michael Cole for the stunners they received last night.

Randy Orton & Rey Mysterio v. CM Punk & Cody Rhodes

Orton takes it to Rhodes and he beats into the mask, making us wonder if the shots are really connecting. We take a quick break.

Commercials.

Random Commercial Thought: The BK Chicken Tenders look nugget-shaped…and they taste like crap.

We’re back and Orton drops the knee to the facemask for two. Tag to Mysterio and he drops the leg for another two count. Tag to Punk and he pulls Mysterio away. He takes it to Mysterio before tagging out to Rhodes. Mysterio with an inside cradle for two. Tag to Orton, but Rhodes is ready. We go corner to corner and Orton explodes with a clothesline for two. Orton gets distracted by Punk and that allows Rhodes to take control. Punk goes after the knee, but Orton powers out. Rhodes connects with the face mask to the knee. Tag to Punk and he stomps on the knee. GTS attempt, but Orton counters to a RKO attempt. Punk counters that with an attack on the knee. We take ANOTHER break.

Commercials.

We’re back again and Orton took Punk to a side slam. Orton breaks out of Punk’s grasp and HERE COMES MYSTERIO! Snapmare takedown, but Rey misses with the kick to the face. Punk and Rhodes take it to Mysterio, but Orton evens it up. Punk is in position, but Mysterio’s 619 is disconnected by Rhodes. Rhodes is back in and he takes it to Mysterio once more. Tag back to Punk. Mysterio counters the powerbomb and we get tags all around. Powerslam by Orton! DDT attempt connects! The Viper coils…Punk gets a distraction, so Orton gets the Angle Slam for two! Orton sends Rhodes to the ropes. 619! RKO! Seal the match.

Winners: Rey Mysterio & Randy Orton
Grade: A-

Stone Cold gets stopped by Triple H and he gives him some deserved respect.

Commercials.

Stone Cold talks to the crowd about Tough Enough appearing after RAW tonight. Sadly, many of them in the arena won’t watch because they have to drive home. He brings out the Tough Enough participants. We get the meet and greet session with the participants. We get a “Stun them all” chant and Stone Cold gets interrupted by the WWE Champion, the Miz. He brags about being “Tough Enough” because he suffered a concussion and he not only continued, but he retained the title. He enters the ring and he talks down all the Tough Enough participants and then he locks eyes with Stone Cold. He thinks Stone Cold has one more run left in him. Huge “One More Match” chants directed to Stone Cold. The Miz wants to clear the ring and he challenges Stone Cold to a match. Stone Cold tells them to clear the ring and Austin peeks behind andwe get the cheap shot. Alex Riley takes and he beats on Austin, but Austin reverses it. He stomps a mudhole and walks it dry. Thez Press connects and we get the Stone Cold Stunner. We get the beers tossed and he hands them to the Tough Enough participants. Stone Cold leaves the ring and he drenches Michael Cole and the Cole Mine with beer.

Commercials.

Alberto del Rio (w/Brodus Clay) v. Evan Bourne

No car for Alberto and no entrance for Evan Bourne. Bell rings and Alberto goes to town on Bourne. Bourne gets in his token offense, but del Rio stops him cold. He kicks Bourne out of the ring and he gets THROWN into the barricade. Back inside, del Rio gets a cover for two. Bourne tries a comeback and he gets a rollup for two. Bourne with some kicks and he gets another two. Bourne flips up to the top rope, but del Rio gets a shining wizard. Cross-arm breaker gets the tap out.

Winner: Alberto del Rio
Grade: C-

Commercials.

We recap WrestleMania week.

Here comes Vickie Guerrero bitching about Snooki. She passes the blame on LayCool. They challenge Trish Stratus & John Morrison…NEXT!

Commercials.

John Morrison & Trish Stratus v. Dolph Ziggler & Vickie Guerrero

The men start things off and Ziggler beats Morrison to the punch. Morrison takes Ziggler to the corner and he tags in Vickie, which brings in Trish Stratus. Vickie gets a cartwheel, but she fails. Trish does the Matrix move and they get face to face. Trish gets enough and she slaps Vickie. Dolph gets in and Vickie takes control. Cover gets two. Ass drop misses and Morrison gets the tag. Both him and Ziggler go balls to the wall. Flash Kick misses. Suplex connects and Trish breaks it up. Trish slaps Ziggler and Morrison connects with the Flash Kick. Starship Pain finishes.

Winners: John Morrison & Trish Stratus
Grade: C

Commercials.

Here’s our main event.

United States Championship: Daniel Bryan v. Sheamus

Lockup and Sheamus finds himself in a keylock early on. He backs into the corner and he assumes control. Early two count for Sheamus. Sheamus sends Bryan hard into the corner. Sheamus runs the apron and he connects with a knee lift. Sheamus applies a headlock, but Bryan gets out of it. Bryan runs into a backbreaker…for two! Bryan makes his comeback with the kicks. Bryan kicks Sheamus in the face and he puts him down for two. LaBell Lock attempt on Sheamus, but Sheamus counters to a backbreaker. Brogue Kick connects and that’s all.

Winner: Sheamus
Grade: C-

Post match, Sheamus attacks Daniel Bryan…AND SIN CARA MAKES HIS DEBUT! He takes Sheamus down and out of the ring.

Commercials.

John Cena Calls Out the Rock

John Cena hits the ring with a mixture of boos and cheers. He knew that the Rock would come to WrestleMania to kick some candy ass and he knew he didn’t mean Zack Ryder. John Cena said that had it not been for the Rock, the main event would have ended in a draw. John Cena gives the Miz respect where it is due. He changes gears and talks about the Rock. He calls out the Rock saying they have business to settle.

After a long pause, the Rock makes his way towards the ring. A huge Fruity Pebbles chant erupts before the Rock speaks. He asked Cena what he think would happen. The Rock talked trash because he can and he’s better than anyone. The Rock respects John Cena and gets booed for saying it. He gives Cena a huge rub, but he says that it doesn’t change the fact that he doesn’t like him. Cena tells the Rock that the time for talk is over. LISTEN TO THE PEOPLE! John Cena lays it down and he challenges the Rock to a match! So do you want to talk about it or do you want to bring it? John Cena takes his gear off and the Rock tells John Cena that he has no idea what he asked for. So the Rock wants the match for WrestleMania 28! The biggest match on the grandest stage of them all! The Rock extends a hand out and John Cena accepts the match!

The Corre storms the ring to take out John Cena and the Rock. Or they try to, but they are the Rock and John Cena. Cena drops the Five Knuckle Shuffle on Heath Slater and the Rock drops the People’s Elbow on Wade Barrett. Attitude Adjustment on Slater and Rock Bottom on Barrett. They shake hands.

Show over. See you later this week for a special 10 Anti-Thoughts on WrestleMania 27.

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Paul Marshall has been with Pulse Wrestling since September 2007. He currently does a weekly WWE Column titled "This Week In 'E". Follow him on Twitter here.