10 Thoughts on WWE Superstars 05.05.2011 — Evan Bourne, Zack Ryder, Trent Barreta, Beth Phoenix

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Well, boys and girls, here we are with another Superstars. I can finally watch it, now that I have commandeered a computer that is aware it’s from the 21st century, unlike my laptop. Boy, this sure was easier when Superstars was on WGN. But I digress.

1. Not gonna lie, I kind of forgot Jey Uso was alive. I did think of a way to remember who is who, though. Jey has the tattoo on his chest. Rey Mysterio has tons of tattoos. Jey. Rey. See what I did there?

2. I had a lot of people electronically bitch slap me when I first start discussing Trent Barreta, as I did not like him. But I’ve watched him develop and grow over the last year, and I like what I see. What used to be a stiff mess of bland energy, has turned into a fluid display of gravity defiance. And his finisher is one I never tire of, now that it’s completed cleanly. Keep it up, Escalator Ninja.

3. Not that I’m behind the whole “We’re not wrestling, we’re global entertainment!” nonsense, but That’s What I Am actually looks really good. Glad to see real substance as opposed to The Chaperone and Knuckleheads.

4. I really need to set a date with my DVR to catch up on Tough Enough. I only watched the first episode, but have been so busy with my “day job” that suddenly, it’s May. Especially because I heard Michelle is gone.

5. It has been far too long since the last time I watched Beth Phoenix in the ring. Please stop pairing her with Khali for duets. She is MUCH needed elsewhere.

6. Melina, on the other hand, almost seems to doing a parody on pro-wrestling at every turn. She has an interesting style, but I find myself furrowing my brow at the things she does more than I marvel.

7. It’s going to take a lot of alcohol to erase the image of Khali in a tooth fairy outfit from my brain.

8. Oh, Evan Bourne. How I was hoping for your Draft to Smackdown, where you might actually do something great. If he was given a real purpose, perhaps even a miniature storyline, I think it could work. In fact, a feud with Ryder would do wonders for both. They seemed to really mesh well together, and fed off each other in this match.

9. Anything I have to say about Ryder, is something that has already been said a million times by either me, or his other fans. So…why not discuss how much I want the hybrid pants back?

10. Random Thought of the Week: Elephant in the room. By now, everyone knows about what happened on Smackdown. That spoiler leaked FAST, due to the outrage that ensued. I want to know what everyone else’s take is on it (and yes, I mean the Orton/Christian debacle), as my delightful opinion will be prepared on my Smackdown Report.

Kelly has been with Inside Pulse since 6/2010, beginning with just her 10 Thoughts on WWE Superstars column. Now she brings you her 10 Thoughts on Smackdown weekly, and constructs the Rasslin' Roundtables for PPV's. In her spare time, she works with indy fed, Future Stars of Wrestling - AZ, wrangles children for her day job, and is generally and exceptionally awesome.