Bongiorno, everybody! Mike Gojira here, back for another exciting edition of The Stomping Ground. As you’ll notice from the title, my column this week has a very simple theme: that of nothing at all. Let’s face it, folks; there’s nothing truly exciting or pressing to talk about in the world of wrestling right now. I’m currently working on an original article that will focus on determining just what feuds helped push some of the biggest stars to the top of their game. That will probably arrive next week, so you’ll just have to deal with this crapfest this week.
People Who Don’t Understand Cheap Plugs
Lately I’ve noticed “hundreds” (read: two, maximum) of readers complaining about why we stroke each other’s…egos here at Inside Pulse. Somehow, I envision in the minds of these readers that an otherworldly demon is devouring these plugs every week and, once it devours a thousand plugs, it will invade the multiverse. Therefore, they have been tasked with a noble quest to stop us from being nice to our fellow writers.
This could not be further from the truth.
In actuality, it is the Flying Spaghetti Monster which feeds off our plugs for sustenance. We do this in the hope that one day we can be touched by its noodly appendage. Join us!
But seriously, I don’t get why anybody would have a problem with this. No one is forcing you to click the links; hell, you don’t even have to read MY posts if you don’t want to (and why wouldn’t you?). Perhaps we need to plug our commenters as well so they can feel the love. Tom Cocozza, thank you for explaining last week why it is that we plug our neighbors here at the Pulse.
Capitol Punishment
Color me surprised that Alex Riley earned a clean win against The Miz last Sunday at the PPV.
R-Truth losing due to Little Jimmy’s interference is what we in the literary business like to call “karma.” It was the perfect ending to a storyline centering around Truth’s disrespect for the fans. Now where does R-Truth go from here since he’s out of the title picture? My guess is the Money in the Bank ladder match next month.
Once again Christian has a legitimate gripe about his title match with Randy Orton. I thought it was odd that Lawler and Booker T refused to acknowledge that his foot was under the ropes at the time he was pinned. Is the fact that he’s a heel the sole reason they’re not accepting the excuse? The feud between these two both intrigues me AND worries me. Why both? Look at it this way: Christian and Orton have had some great matches and there’s no reason NOT to continue the story. What worries me is that the ‘E may be prolonging this feud just because of the heel overload situation on Smackdown.
Let me get this straight…Daniel Bryan/Sin Cara vs Legacy is a growing feud on Smackdown, and instead of a logical payday for those four, Evan Bourne and Jack Swagger get a match out of the blue? Huwhut?!
Power to the Creative Team
If you ever thought the Taboo Tuesday/Cyber Sunday/Power to the People voting was rigged, this past Monday night on Raw proved your suspicions to be correct. Mason fuckin’ Ryan?! Really? Really? Riley? Jimmy? (I know, that joke’s been beaten to death.) Even the WWE itself acknowledged a discrepancy in the voting, citing “a backlog of votes from the Divas match” as the reason why Sin Cara did not go up against Bourne. Luckily, we’ll get Sin Cara vs Bourne next week, but come on. They also claimed there was an issue with the Ziggler/Kofi match and that it was supposed to be “Vickie banned from ringside.”
IF (and I do mean IF) the voting was somehow NOT rigged, I’d like to think the IWC got together and collectively told Vince to go fuck himself by screwing with the votes. An arm wrestling match between Mark Henry and Kane? Really? Kelly Kelly over Beth Phoenix?
Speaking of Mizark, here’s further proof that the Draft means diddly squat. Now he seems to be on the verge of a feud with Big Show (a Raw guy). This also seems to lend credence to the belief that WWE is booking on the fly; otherwise, moving Mark Henry to Smackdown would have placed him in a feud with someone from Smackdown almost immediately. Instead he waffled around near the title picture for about two weeks.
CM Punk is a genius on the mic. I loved the bit about making snow angels and I was surprised that he was allowed to mention his contract being up soon. Perhaps, as some speculate, this is all a ruse and he truly did re-sign but is simply taking a few well-deserved months off.
No Barrett or Jackson on Raw? I thought that was odd. I was also surprised to see that Cena had no mic time (not that I didn’t mind).
Here’s an awesome thought: what if Zack Ryder was one of the opponents fans could have picked for Bourne? I would have loved to see the results of that one.
Overall, there was no advancement of any storyline besides Punk’s inevitable last day at the next PPV. We had a great triple threat match, but neither Mysterio nor del Rio benefited from it. Truth and The Miz also went nowhere in terms of future plans. I’m guessing Mysterio, del Rio, Truth, Miz, Riley, and a returning Morrison will be in the ladder match next month. Here’s to another month of same old “same old”!
Cheap Plugs
Ah, the dreaded Cheap Plugs segment! Muahahahahaha! Only a few more plugs and the dreaded Cthulhu will rise from his endless slumber!
Matt Harrak makes a great point about the misuse of World Champions from other companies who join the WWE in his latest Creatively Endeavored.
Joel Leonard gives his thoughts on Raw here and Chris Sanders does so here.
Steven Gepp hits us up with a look back at movies starring pro wrestlers. Yes, Hell Comes to Frogtown is included.
Finally, Patrick Spohr returns with a look at the character of Super Cena.
There seems to be no Kue’s ReKall this week (as of this posting), and Rhett Davis is out of commission until next week.
I’d apologize for the redundancy of this column (since everyone else seems to share many of my thoughts), but I could care less this week. God’s honest truth.
So long, and thanks for all the fish.
