Welcome back to 10 Thoughts on Raw, and guess what? I LIED! I’ll actually be your host from now until Pulse Wrestling wises up to my act. Before we get to the hot, juicy thoughts, I figured I ought to clue all of you in to how this whole â€œ10 Thoughtsâ€ thing will work under the iron-fist of my regime.
I write my thoughts as I watch the show; everything is in the present-tense. All the thoughts will be in chronological order. So there will be thoughts that occur before, during, and after matches and promos. Note that if something jumps out at me while I’m writing, I’ll throw it into that thought. When I quote a promo or the announce team, I’ll do my best to denote when in the show this took place.
With all that nonsense out of the way, let’s get down to it because Nickelback’s patented brand of Canadian butt-rock is blaring.
1. I’ll be honest here, I don’t really understand the appeal of Raw Roulette. I prefer that my stipulation matches make sense as part of a feud, not just thrown together based purely on â€œchanceâ€. I guess that puts me at odds with the WWE.
2. It’s nice to see HBK back on Raw, though, in all reality, he hasn’t been gone that long. He still gets a great pop, so I understand why he’s been brought in. As long as his appearances are infrequent and he can make an impact story-wise, I’ll be okay with it. At least HBK is being honest in his promo, admitting that he couldn’t stay away for long. I understand you’re excited about being back Shawn, and you’re plugging away at your hunting and nature show, but why the redneck uniform? I guess he’s always been like that, but it’s just a little odd to me. AND CM PUNK! Two weeks in a row with a lead-off promo; I love it.
3. My that was convenient. Punk is forced to square off against a mystery opponent, and that opponent just happens to be Kane, who he faced last week! And even more fortuitous for the ‘E, Kane just happens to be standing off-camera, just to Booker’s right. My, isn’t it amazing how things work out like that, like they were planned in advance or something?
4. Well, well, well. The ‘E is eating crow right now, having to include the Sin Cara/Evan Bourne match. And they’re blaming it on a crashed server? Well, I don’t care, so long as we get the match. Oh, and the ‘E’s breast delivery system Eve Torres is here to help Booker. Fantastic. There’s a little looseness in this match, which is to be expected when two guys don’t have a lot of experience together. Here’s to hoping the ‘E puts these two in a program with each other; I think if they can build some chemistry, they can do some great things. And no botches! Maybe Sin Cara is settling in a little bit. Great match; a nice change of pace.
5. Thank you Kofi for banning Vicky from ringside. I had my fill of the King’s comedic repertoire last week. I think Vince and Lawler need to be reminded that they’re pushing an anti-bullying public service announcement right now. They’re kind of undercutting their own message by having King bully Vicky over a weight issue, and she isn’t even that big anymore.
6. I’m getting the feeling that this Kofi/Ziggler feud is going to be the ‘E’s version of General Hospital: 20 years from now, I’ll probably still be watching these two go at it. That said, I still like the matches. And if certain writers on this site are willing to overlook the length of the Punk/Mysterio feud due to the quality of the matches, then I’ll feel free to do the same with Kofi and Dolph. SHUT THE HELL UP, KING! Vicky is not even at ringside and he won’t stop talking about her. He’s like a 12 year old boy who thinks that insulting a girl will get her to like him. Are you gonna’ rub dirt in her hair next, King?
7. I had hoped, HOPED, that after Capital Punishment Alberto del Rio would be out of his feud with the Big Show. Maybe Alberto will be inserted into the main event scene when Punk leaves, because Alberto deserves better than a feud with Show. Show demands a slower pace, which just negates the great technical skills of Alberto. Hmmm, Mark Henry having trouble opening up a steel-cage door. This feels…familiar. Okay, â€œSexual Chocolateâ€ putting Big Show through the side of the steel cage was kind of cool, I’ll admit. I guess my internet pundit membership will be revoked for praising something Mark Henry was involved in.
8. Ugh, Kelly Kelly. I hate sounding so negative about the Diva’s division all the time, since I really want things to get better, but Kelly shouldn’t be the face of this division. The ‘E may have given up on Gail Kim, but they haven’t totally buried Beth Phoenix. Beth should be holding this title. Oh, a submission match. This makes things even better. I’ve always suspected that Brie Bella and Kelly Kelly were the modern equivalents of Dean Malenko and Chris Jericho. You know what, someone needs to let these ladies know that â€œsellingâ€ doesn’t mean â€œshriek like a tortured Salem witchâ€.
9. AND…the burial of Drew McIntyre is complete. I guess we can add that to the list of HBK’s achievements: he once Super-kicked the career out of someone. Future of the company…right. I will say that it’s good to see DDP on TV; I wouldn’t mind seeing him pop up from time to time on Raw, maybe in an occasional guest-host spot. Couldn’t be worse than Florence Henderson.
10. I’m having a hard time telling if A-Ry’s crowd-appeal is dying down; I just don’t hear the same pop that he got originally. The ‘E, in their rush to promote new face talent, probably pulled the trigger on him a little too early. He could have benefited from an extended program with The Miz; have A-Ry lose to Miz at Capital Punishment and build the feud for a few more months. I will say, this Mysterio/A-Ry/Miz/Swagger match has been good; the crowd was really into this one.
I had so much to say during this Raw, I’ll throw in an extra thought here:
11. â€œIs he wearing some version of a straight-jacket?â€ Cole, you damn idiot, the thing Truth is wearing out to the ring has a zipper on the front and is sleeveless, which kind of defeats the intended purpose of a straight-jacket. It’s like a white flak-jacket or bullet-proof vest or something. Wait, why is Cena bothering to bring a second table into the ring? There’s already one set up; why waste time bringing in another one? And another Punk appearance, with a nice â€œPunk is better than Cenaâ€ poster in the background. I agree with you, random fan. Good to bookend the show with another Punk pro…wow, this is incendiary. I’m sure it’s a worked-shoot, but God is it good. And Hulk and Paul Heyman references? Damn. I’m sure part of this comes from his issues with the company, and the fact that they’re letting him use this as fuel for a great angle is amazing. Bravo WWE, you even let him name-drop Ring of Honor and Colt Cabana.
Okay, that might have been the best ending to an episode of Raw in a LONG time. Even though it’s most assuredly a worked-shoot, the fact that Vince gave this promo the okay is a good sign. Whether they’ll follow this up with more work of this caliber remains to be seen, but tonight was a good night.
Check out Caught in the Ropes this week; I really break down Bischoff’s IWC comments. Make sure to take a gander at the many amazing articles here at Pulse Wrestling, and see you next week!
Tags: alberto del rio, Alex Riley, big show, Cena, cm punk, DDP, Dolph Ziggler, evan bourne, jack swagger, Kelly Kelly, Kofi Kingston, Mark Henry, R-Truth, Raw, rey mysterio, shawn michaels, sin cara, The Bella Twins, The Miz, WWE