Pulse Wrestling Coverage: WWE SmackDown! 07.15.2011 – Christian Plays Mind Games, Sin Cara, Mark Henry, Sheamus, Wade Barrett, Kane

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Welcome to the coverage of WWE SmackDown! for July 15th.  I’m stepping in for Kelly Floyd who is no doubt having fun at a beach somewhere.  Anyways let’s get down to business as I hear the painful onslaught of Green Day coming on.

SmackDown opens with Josh Matthews already in the ring who introduces Randy Orton and I hear Rev Theory.  Orton comes down to the ring beard and all and there are SO many signs for Orton in the audience.  Josh says that if Orton is disqualified Sunday, Christian becomes World Heavyweight Champion.  Josh says Orton has mental issues and asks is he scared he may lose his temper and the title.  Orton says he won’t get disqualified this Sunday.  Orton thinks he’s proven that there is more than one way to beat Christian.  Orton says that it is just a ploy to try and steal the title from him.  Christian pops up on the Titan Tron and he says he doesn’t want to win nor does he need to win by disqualification.  Christian says his lawyers forced him to add that stipulation and that he just wants to have a classic match like they always do.  He says he has a gift for Orton and it’s him holding the World Title over a laid out Orton.  Christian says that was the night he smashed Randy in the face with the title.  Christian tells him to put it up in the locker room Sunday so he can look at it before he goes out to lose to him.  Orton says this is pathetic.  Christian says that Orton’s family was pathetic with his dad wearing a cast for 7 years.  He calls Bob a glorified sidekick and that he’s in the Drew Carey wing of the Hall of Fame.  Christian says they only included him in the Hall of Fame to make Randy happy.  Randy tells Christian to come down to the ring and repeat everything he just said.  Christian says he’ll come down to the ring after he beats Orton Sunday.  He says he’ll tell the world what a pathetic champion Randy was.  Orton says Christian says he is a pathetic bitchy flash-in-the-pan that only had a claim to fame of his best friend helping him to a long 5 day reign.  He says that’s pathetic.

We get a video package of Mark Henry, a very dominating look at Henry.

Commercials.

We’re back and Ezekiel Jackson is defending his Intercontinental Championship against Ted DiBiase tonight.

Intercontinental Championship:  Ezekiel Jackson vs Ted DiBiase

Nunzio is the ref.  Nice side note.  They tie up and Zeke pushes him into the corner and lets him go but Ted slaps Zeke making him mad who then throws him over his shoulder and then hits a running shoulderblock for a two.  Zeke clotheslines Ted over the top rope and moves outside to smash Ted’s head into the apron and tries to powerslam Ted into the post, but Ted reverses and rams Zeke into it.  Ted then dropkicks Zeke into the post and rolls him into the ring for a two.  Ted kicks Zeke in the face and then starts stomping a mudhole in Zeke in the corner.  Zeke reverses an Irish Whip but Ted moves and hits a sort of Dream Street variation for a two.  Ted then locks in a headlock, but Zeke fights out and clotheslines down Ted.  He hits a few more clotheslines before slamming Ted.  Ted attempts the Dream Street, but Zeke powers out and hits two more body slams.  Zeke tries for the Torture Rack, but Ted reverses and tries for Dream Street again and Zeke powers out.  Zeke locks in the Rack and that’s it.

Winner (and STILL I-C Champ):  Ezekiel Jackson

Zeke celebrates as Cody looks on a screen in the back.

Sheamus vs Sin Cara tonight as well as Randy Orton vs Kane and Daniel Bryan vs Cody Rhodes.

Commercials.

We come back and Ted is walking backstage and sees Cody.  Ted says he tried.  Cody tells him to put the bag on because he’s a loser.  Cody says he is going to give him one more chance, but Ted can’t lose any more matches or Cody will personally put that bag on his face.

Daniel Bryan comes out and then we get a video package of his feud with Cody Rhodes.  Cody Rhodes comes out pursued by his lackeys to hand out paper bags.  I love Cody’s new gig.  The jacket and mystery just reminds me of Dr. Doom.  One of the lackeys hands Booker a paper bag again.

Cody Rhodes vs Daniel Bryan

They tie up and Cody pushes him into the corner and hits a punch to the gut.  Daniel dodges the next and hits some chops before Irish Whipping Cody to the opposite corner.  Cody attempts the Alabama Slam, but Daniel Bryan reverses and tries to hit the LaBell Lock.  Cody rolls to the ropes and gets trapped there by Daniel Bryan who then drop kicks Rhodes off the apron.  Daniel Bryan jumps through the ropes and takes down Cody.

Commercials.

Back and Rhodes is in control and has a single leg Boston Crab locked in.  Daniel Bryan fights out and gets a roll up for a two.  Cody knocks down Daniel and then stomps on the face.  Cody then pushes Bryan into the ropes and knees him in the midsection.  He takes down Daniel for a two and then locks in a single leg Boston Crab again, but Bryan gets to the ropes.  Bryan fights back up and starts hit furious strikes to the face and then hits his flying forearm.  Daniel hits a jawbreaker and a flying knee for a two.  Bryan pounds on Cody’s face until the ref pulls him off.  Cody takes down Bryan and hits Hardcore Holly’s old kick to the groin move and then hits an Alabama Slam for a two.  Cody sets up for the CrossRhodes, but Daniel climbs up the ropes and flips over.  Daniel Bryan is back in the corner but he reverses Cody’s charge and locks the LaBell Lock in on the top rope!  Cody pushes Bryan over the rope to escape.  Bryan gets back up and climbs the top rope and hits a huge flying forward kick and gets a two.  Bryan charges Cody in the corner and hits a flying knee.  He sets Cody up on the top rope but Cody throws him on his groin on the top rope.  Cody hits the Beautiful Disaster for the three.

Winner:  Cody Rhodes

Cody leaves very quickly and it leads into a backstage segment with T-Lo.  Long tells the ref that if there is any physicality between Show and Henry in the face-off there will be no match Sunday.  Long talks about playing blackjack and slots until Kane busts into the office.  Kane thanks T-Lo for honoring his request for a match with Orton tonight.  Kane says something is wrong with him.  Kane says he’s a monster and monsters don’t lose to anybody.  Kane says he’s feeling less and less like a monster and more like a human being.  Long says if it makes Kane feel better that he’s scaring the hell out of him.  Kane says that’s why he needs to fight the best of the best.  If Long would’ve really been scared of him, he wouldn’t have been able to tell him.  Kane leaves Long to stand scared.

Commercials.

Back and there’s a photo shoot going on backstage with Jinder Mahal and The Great Khali.  Jinder gets mad because the photographer is focusing on Khali instead of him.  Jinder says that his face is the only one that matters.

Christian is walking by Orton’s private bus.  Christian says he should get the number of his dealer.  Christian notices writing on the side of the bus that says ‘Orton sux! Teddy Long =Moron Christian – Uncrowned World Champion!’  Christian asks who would dare do this to Randy’s private property?  Christian says he won’t stand for this.  He says that he’ll find out who did this.  He says that this won’t go unnoticed.  He says he’s going to figure it out because he cares.

Sheamus’ music hits and out comes The Celtic Warrior.  Wade Barrett is on commentary. Sin Cara comes out and they will fight after the…

Commercials.

The bell rings and we’re underway.  Sheamus lifts Cara and drives him into the turnbuckle, Sheamus starts throwing blows to the back of Cara.  Sheamus throws him into the ropes and Cara hurricanranas Sheamus.  Sheamus gets up and tries to charge Cara, but Sheamus runs straight into the turnbuckle.  Cara starts with a number of kicks to the arms and chest before Sheamus pushes him into the ropes.  Sheamus lifts Cara up, but Cara kicks him back and starts back with the kicks.  Sheamus fights out and sets Cara up on the top rope and starts grabbing the mask.  The ref gets involved and Cara does a flashy arm drag.  Sheamus knocks down Cara and then hits a sidewalk slam for a two.  Sheamus picks him up and Irish Whips Cara into the corner, but Cara elbows him in his charge.  Sheamus charges right into another inverted hurricanrana. Sheamus picks up Cara and punches his chest as Cara is throw the ropes.  Cara is leaning over the second rope as Sheamus charges him on the outside of the apron and hits a kneelift.  Sheamus climbs back in and locks Cara around the neck.  Cara fights out, but Sheamus knocks him down again.  Sheamus locks the neck lock again.  Sheamus attempts a powerslam, but Sin Cara slips out.  Sheamus charges for the Bicycle Kick, but Cara moves and Sheamus tumbles outside.  Sheamus climbs back in, but Cara drop kicks him off guard for a two.  Sin Cara tries a Springboard Splash, but Sheamus catches him and drives his spine into the corner before hitting the Last Call.  Sheamus sets up for the Razor’s Edge, but Sin Cara rolls him up for the three.

Winner:  Sin Cara

Wade Barrett jumps in the ring post match and big boots Sheamus in the face.  He picks him up and hits the Wasteland.

We go to a shot of the Casino and Christian is walking about with Randy’s wallet.  He sorts through his Discover card, his wife’s photo, and then he finds $1000 in his wallet.  Who carries $1000?  Christian puts all of the money on one because Randy’s birthday is April 1st.  The Roulette wheel spins and it lands on 20.  Christian asks if it is rigged and then says that Randy’s luck just ran out.

Commercials.

We’re back and Theodore Long is in the ring.  T-Lo reminds us that there will be no physical actions between them or no match Sunday.  The Big Show’s music hits and here he comes sporting a Letterman WrestleMania… 20 jacket??  He then introduces Mark Henry.  Henry says he isn’t going past the stage because he doesn’t want to lose his temper.  Big Show says that his temper is the only thing keeping him from chokeslamming Henry straight to hell.  Henry says he isn’t chokeslamming anybody.  He says Sunday he’ll be in his hell and this was all his fault.  They show a video clip of Big Show going crazy about a month ago because of Del Rio’s attacks on him.  Henry had to be stretchered out.  Back to the show, Show says that for 15 years people have been waiting for Henry to wake up.  Show says that he lit a fire in Henry and that he can put that fire out.  Henry says that bigger isn’t better.  Stronger is better.  Meaner is better.  Better is better.  Henry says he has no idea of what he is capable of.  Show says Henry doesn’t know what he is capable of either and that they should get it on now, screw Sunday!  Show takes off his jacket, but T-Lo says nay.  Long says this isn’t happening, and he doesn’t want to fine anyone.  Long says that Sunday he’ll let God sort it out.  The giants glare at each other as we fade to…

Commercials.

We’re back and Rosa Mendes is in the ring with Alicia Fox.  Kelly Kelly is making a surprise appearance to be her opponent.

Kelly Kelly vs Rosa Mendes

Kelly jumps on Rosa’s shoulders and attempts a Victory Roll for a one.  Rosa pushes Kelly into the ropes for a one and she unloads some fists on Kelly’s face.  Rosa pulls Kelly’s arms back in a submission.  Kelly fights out with a booty bump before tripping Rosa.  She smashes her face into the mat before licking her hand and smacking Rosa’s butt.  Kelly throws Rosa into the corner and hits the Stink Face.  Kelly goes for a bulldog, but Rosa throws her off.  Rosa hits the ropes but Kelly kicks her and hits the K2 for the three.

Winner:  Kelly Kelly

They fade to a backstage segment with Johnny Curtis.  Curtis pulls a cat out of a bag, but it actually is an elephant.  Curtis asks Mikey where the cat is and Mikey says it climbed a tree.  Curtis says that the elephant in the room isn’t until next week.  He rips the head off of the elephant and hands the body to Mikey who begins to weep into it.

Commercials.

We’re back and they hype the Money In The Bank PPV.

Christian is backstage somewhere and he says that he is a big fan of Randy’s.  Christian says that there is a deleted scene that shows Orton’s real talent.  They show a clip from the movie That’s What I Am and the screen freezes on Orton’s face.  Christian calls Orton a caveman because of the vacant look on his face.  Christian says that Orton is a bad actor.  He apologizes to the woman and says that he loved her in Uncle Buck.  Christian says he doesn’t know why they cancelled that scene, but good luck in his match with Orton.

Commercials.

We’re back and Justin Gabriel is on his way to the ring.  Heath Slater comes out next and says that they were on top of the world of the tag team division.  Slater says that Gabriel’s been dropping the ball and that Sunday he will win MITB Sunday because he is the One Man… Rockband.

Justin Gabriel vs Heath Slater

The bell rings and they circle before Gabriel initiates some chain wrestling.  Gabriel locks in a side headlock until Slater fights out and then Gabriel takes out the legs of Slater for a quick one.  Slater gets up and punches Gabriel in the head and locks in a side headlock.  Gabriel fights out and kicks Slater in the face and then hits a spinning punch to the face.  Slater whips Gabriel into the corner, but Justin dodges his charge.  Gabriel sets up on the top rope, but Slater jumps up on the top rope and flips Justin over.  Slater goes for a backflip, but Justin dodges.  Gabriel hits his 450 Splash for the three.

Winner:  Justin Gabriel

Kane and Randy Orton look determined as they walk straight into a…

Commercial.

We come back for a video package from Monday’s awesome promos by Punk.  Kane’s pyro hits and out comes Kane.  Voice are being heard and out comes Mr. Orton himself checking behind him as he walks.

Kane vs Randy Orton

Kane charges first, but Randy moves out of the way and starts with the fists in the corner.  Kane fights back with the throat thrusts and then with a huge clotheslined in the corner.  He clotheslines him again and then attempts a sidewalk slam.  Kane gets on the top rope and hits the flying clothesline.  Kane sets up for the chokeslam, but Randy dodges it.  Kane whips him into the ropes and Randy attempts to clothesline Kane, but to no avail.  Kane hits the ropes and Orton hits the scoop slam.  Orton pulls Kane through the ropes and hits the DDT on the second rope.  Orton starts pounding the ground, but Kane pushes Orton out of it.  Orton notices Christian who walked out at the beginning of the match.  Kane clotheslines Orton over the top rope, but goes with him.  Orton chases Christian around ringside and is about to go back in the ring before Christian pours cold water on Orton’s back to distract him.

Winner: (Countout) Kane

Christian ran out, but came back with Orton in pursuit.  Christian runs back into the ring and Kane throat thrusts Orton.  They double stomp Kane in the corner until Kane turns on Christian.  Christian runs away before Kane touches him.  Kane turns around and straight into an RKO.  Christian runs back in the ring and spears Orton right after.  Christian grabs the title and the steel chair and brings them into the ring.  Orton reverses Christian’s chair shot on him and Christian runs.  Orton is furious and he smacks Kane on the back with the chair a few times with more and more venom each time.  Orton is seething afterwards and Christian smirks from the rampway.

And quite frankly my dear… that’s a wrap!

Rhett Davis is a college student striving to become an engineer one day. He enjoys watching men fight over a pigskin, partying it up, and watching oiled up men move each other in unique positions on a mat. He started writing on 1/19/11.