This Week In ‘E – 07.18.2011: Do I Have Everybody’s Attention Now?

After three months, This Week in ‘E has come back to Inside Pulse Wrestling!

My Space, Because It’s Just That

No, I’m not Mark Allen. I’m not even the evil twin of Pulse Glazer. I’m your former RAW Reporter, Paul Marshall. I told you last month that I wasn’t going to leave Pulse Wrestling. I needed a change in scenery, as doing the RAW Report every week was becoming more of an issue as I have been having substitutes filling in on a semi-weekly basis. It was better for me to hand it off to someone else that wouldn’t have that problem and for me to revive the one column that has been lacking since WrestleMania XVII.

Before anyone asks, I didn’t take a bonus from Widro for doing this column. No free DVD’s, games, cash, or even a free virtual item on Facebook. He loves me, but not that much. So, we can lay that to rest right now.

So now, let’s take some ‘E…

The News of the Week

WWE Money in the Bank is in the books and we have two new champions and two briefcases floating around the locker room. I’m going to take this time to quickly comment about what went down.

Daniel Bryan wins the SmackDown Money in the Bank Ladder Match

My pick was Cody Rhodes, because if the plan was for Randy Orton to retain the title, who else could he defend against? However, Daniel Bryan winning made sense and I was hoping, even if it would last a minute, see him coming out after the RAW Main Event on orders of Vince McMahon.

Kelly Kelly retains the Diva’s Championship

I love the Bella Twins and Kelly Kelly, but it’s time for Kelly Kelly to find some new competition and there’s some divas on SmackDown that could make for an interesting feud and it would make the Diva’s Title feel more important.

Mark Henry destroys the Big Show

Rumors are flying that Big Show will be out for four months due to the injury he suffered at the hands of Mark Henry. This was nothing but a reminder that when the WWE Creative is serious about booking Henry as a monster, they can do so without any problems.

Alberto del Rio wins the RAW Money in the Bank Ladder Match

I was let down at the result because I feel Alberto is being pushed too much. He has a Royal Rumble win, a WrestleMania “main event” (even if they jerked the curtain), and now a Money in the Bank as accolades. He does nothing to me on the mic or in the ring. Although getting rid of Ricardo Rodriguez was a start, Alberto has a long way to go in being a credible person in my eyes. My money was on the Miz until he almost broke his leg.

Christian wins the World Heavyweight Championship

It’s about time someone wins a title due to a stipulation being enforced. Many times when a “title can change hands on a DQ” stipulation is added to a match it guarantees that the champion will retain. But Christian spit in the face of the Viper and Orton unleashed hell on Christian in response. It was an entertaining match. Add to the fact that they teased a Daniel Bryan cash-in and it makes me want to watch SmackDown this week.

CM Punk wins the WWE Championship and he leaves Chicago

I know that the WWE will still find some way to give the 2011 Slammy for Match of the Year to Triple H and Undertaker, CM Punk and John Cena BLEW THAT MATCH up and they went over 30 minutes in what was truly an epic encounter. I would compare this match to John Cena versus Rob Van Dam at the Hammerstein Ballroom, but even Punk/Cena trumped that match. It was surreal seeing Chicago giving CM Punk a hero’s welcome and that the WWE seemed forced to inflate the Cena cheers to make it seem that people like Cena. The second Cena made his entrance, I heard nothing but BOOS. During the match, it seemed that the WWE piped in the “Let’s Go Cena / Cena Sucks” chant. It just felt forced. Punk winning was what was needed to make this night a success. The look on Vince’s face when Punk rendered Alberto ineffective and running away was priceless.

Sin Cara was suspended by WWE for violating the WWE Wellness Policy

This can easily explain why Sin Cara took the bump he did on the ladder and worked the stretcher job, even though the WWE is also saying that Sin Cara was injured, possibly being out for four weeks. With WWE also having a hard time trademarking Sin Cara, the recent development of him failing a Wellness test does not bode well for the Mexican sensation. I would almost expect him to go back to FCW after his suspension is over with and work on his in-ring ability and to tone it down to reduce botches.

Former WWE Star Shawn Michaels Gets Criticized by PETA

I didn’t want to mention this because of the quote a PETA representative used in describing Shawn Michael’s show. However, this is news and this is a news column, so to speak.

In a FOX News article chronicling Shawn Michaels’ new television show on hunting to feed his family, a PETA representative was quoted saying “Jeffrey Dahmer ate everything he killed, too, but that didn’t justify taking innocent lives”. Shawn Michaels wasn’t concerned about the negative remarks as he replied, “In every aspect of my life, I live under the protection of and in accordance to the laws of this nation. At the end of the day, it’s a wildlife biological fact and a conservation fact that the game must be managed. There’s only so much habitat, i.e. food, out there. If you have 100 acres worth of food and you’ve got 500 animals out there, the young ones and the old ones are going to starve to death, because they can’t compete,” Michaels said. “When they starve, they start to eat things they shouldn’t be eating and spread disease not only to them, but to us.”

Shawn Michaels gave a verbal KO to PETA for their comments about his show. Shawn is 100% correct in the fact that the animal population does need to be maintained for the safety of both humans and animals. The comment made by the PETA representative was 100% tasteless as they portrayed Shawn as Jeffrey Dahmer. I had just recently watched the movie about Dahmer and I have to say that PETA should be ashamed. But then again, PETA will always complain about anyone and everyone that eats meat. But, just because I, myself, eat meat – it does not mean I am a cannibal and eat human flesh. That, my friends, is insanity.

Tonight…

Vince McMahon will address what happened at WWE Money in the Bank and WWE RAW will be without a champion as rumor says that CM Punk is at a Chicago Cubs game tonight. What will happen as Alberto del Rio holds onto a worthless briefcase and John Cena could get fired? I don’t have the answers, but watch RAW tonight and you’ll see what direction the WWE will take going forward.

Last Week…

SmackDown!

RAW!

The Ratings Are In

RAW (7.11.11) – 2.9

A.M. RAW (7.09.11) – 0.46

SmackDown! (7.08.11) – 1.73

Note that current SmackDown and A.M. RAW ratings may not be available at press time, therefore the latest ratings information that is available will be used.

What? You Didn’t Spend $50 On WWE Money in the Bank?

In case you didn’t, the results were posted above, and will be rehashed below without any commentary.

Daniel Bryan wins the SmackDown Money in the Bank Ladder Match
Kelly Kelly d. Brie Bella to retain the WWE Diva’s Championship
Mark Henry d. Big Show
Alberto del Rio wins the RAW Money in the Bank Ladder Match
Christian d. Randy Orton via DQ to win the World Heavyweight Championship
CM Punk d. John Cena to win the WWE Championship

Now you know what happened, how did the Pulse Wrestling writers do?

CB 5-1
Steven Gepp 5-1
Mike Gojira 4-2
Joe Violet 4-2
Patrick Spohr 3-3
Rhett Davis 3-3
MC Brown 3-3

Congratulations to CB and Steven Gepp for their nearly perfect scores!

The Top Five
Each week, I will rank the top five WWE superstars based on promo work, match skills, strength of their competition, title wins or retentions, and personal bias.

5. The Miz – I would give Alberto del Rio credit, but the Miz truly shocked me in the RAW Money in the Bank Ladder Match. The man slipped off the briefcase and he tried to land on his feet, only to land wrong and was deep in pain. There was much concern that the Miz broke his leg, as the fall was ugly and you could easily tell that something was wrong with the leg. The Miz was taken to the back and he would hop on one leg later in the match to attempt to win the contract. All in all, this further explains that the Miz…is…AWESOME!

4. Christian – He won the World Heavyweight Championship by outsmarting Randy Orton and making him get DQ’ed. I can’t think of anyone in WWF/WWE history that has ever won a championship via disqualification. Christian is settling in as an opportunist, just like Edge was.

3. Daniel Bryan – He surprised the world by winning the SmackDown Money in the Bank Ladder Match. Is a future title reign in sight for the man that was known as the Best in the World in ROH?

2. John Cena – It does take TWO to make an epic match and I respect the fact that John Cena worked his ass off Sunday night to make CM Punk worth more than a million bucks.

1. CM Punk – He is the hottest free agent in wrestling today holding the WWE Championship. Who else could make that claim? Nobody.

Before You Leave, Check Out Other Pulse Offerings

Here’s my plug this week: Check out EVERYONE that has posted a column this week. Without everyone contributing, Inside Pulse Wrestling would not have a reason to exist. Because of the contributions, we appreciate everyone that comes across the site and read what we love to talk about. There is no individual spotlight this week, because everyone on the team has done a great job over the past week.

Finale

That’s all this week. Over the course of the next few weeks, I’ll slowly tweak this column to make it unique and stand out more. See you next week!

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