Out of all the actresses from the Sex and the City quartet, Kim Cattrall has fallen the hardest from the heights of their HBO days. Whereas Sarah Jessica Parker has become an oddly bankable actress, Kristin Davis and Cynthia Nixon becoming character actresses like they were before the series, Cattrall had a brief run as a sexpot and then crashed. The aftermath of the show’s ending seemed to point to Cattrall becoming a much bigger star afterwards. Out of the four she had that “it” factor that screamed for her to become a bigger star.
It never happened.
Basing her entire career appeal on sexuality can work in television, it seems, but it just didn’t translate to cinema and those roles. Parker’s everywoman shtick resonates much more and it’s reason why her career has moved above Sex and the City. Whereas Parker has found some success as a leading lady, the best Cattrall has been able to do is reprising the same character that made her famous in both Sex and the City films. Cattrall can play Samantha really well but no one really wants to see her doing anything else. Thus projects like Meet Monica Velour.
Cattrall is the titular Velour, a washed up ‘80s porn star reduced to being a low-rent stripper in rural Indiana. When her biggest fan, a geeky teenager named Tobe (Dustin Ingram), comes out from a great distance to see his favorite porn star he comes away disappointed. Becoming her newfound buddy and fan, they embark on a quirky generation-skipping friendship in what’s supposed to be an irreverent comedy. What it turns into is the answer to a fairly easy question:
What would happen if a fourth rate Napoleon Dynamite wannabe discovered that an adult film star from 30 years ago didn’t age gracefully?
That’s this film in an essence, trying to combine the quirky off-beat nature of the surprise hit with a coming of age storyline about fantasy and reality. There’s plenty of material to mine here, especially with Cattrall in a near autobiographical role as a washed up sex symbol years past her prime, but instead of going with a darker look the film tries to go quirky instead. This material doesn’t lend itself towards quirky, especially when dealing with this type of story. It just makes the film tedious and almost pretentious in a way; there is not a single laugh to be found in the film.
It falls flat and whatever comedy is supposed to come out just feels like a bad Napoleon Dynamite impression. And that seems like a compliment in comparison to how awful this film is.
The requisite Deleted scenes and the film’s Theatrical Trailer are included.
If you want to watch Napoleon Dynamite, do yourself a favor and get that instead.
Anchor Bay presents Meeting Monica Velour. Written and Directed by Keith Bearden. Starrin Kim Cattrall, Dustin Ingram. Running time: 97 minutes. Rated R. Released on DVD: August 16, 2011. Available at Amazon.com.
