Rasslin’ Roundtable — WWE Hell in a Cell

WWE Championship

Mike Gojira: For the past two weeks, I’ve claimed that the conspiracy will finally come to a head at the PPV.  In order for that to happen, I can only see del Rio walking out with the strap.  In all honesty, though, there’s no point to taking the title off him for two weeks, is there?  Regardless of illogical title changes, I’m going with del Rio as a two-time WWE Champion.  Shenanigans?  Of course!  This is a WWE PPV with a TNA story line, isn’t it?  No way there’s a clean win.
Winner and New WWE Champion: Alberto del Rio

Chris Sanders: Welcome to the match that I wanted at Night of Champions before WWE rushed the CM Punk/HHH/Kevin Nash story. Here’s the skinny, in my eyes: I know the gut reaction is to assume Cena is going to retain but if the Survivor Series poster holds true, Cena is apparently teaming up with The Rock. So that being said, I’m assuming Cena and Rock are gonna form some sort of team for the traditional Survival Series match. Who they’re gonna be against is a whole other story. But making that assumption means there still needs to be a title match apart from that. So that leaves Punk and Alberto Del Rio. I think something involving the Nash/Johnny Ace/HHH story will make Punk lose so there can be some sort of resolution for that at SS. That being said, that leaves only one…
Winner: Alberto Del Rio

Steven Gepp: I don’t understand this booking, but I’m still thinking it is leading to something, that they have a long-term plan in the making. Here’s how I see this going: With help from Nash, Johnny Ace, Miz and Truth, Del Rio ekes out the win. This leads to a classic Survivor Series match, with Cena and Punk on the other side. They recruit some one (Sheamus?), and then the Rock volunteers, and we have a 4-on-4 SurSer classic. It’s going to come down to Rock and Cena v Del Rio. Misunderstanding leads to Rock being eliminated before Cena wins it. So we have Cena v Rock set for Wrestlemania, and Punk can go after Del Rio… or somehow Stone Cold Steve Austin in interjected somehow, and that leads to their encounter.
Winner: Del Rio

Scott Keith:  Obviously, in WWE-Land, Del Rio eating a clean pinfall loss to CM Punk on the go-home RAW means that he’s primed to win the title back.  The more pressing question becomes why does this even need to be in a Cell?  Why is CM Punk even involved?  Is the HHH feud now over and Punk suddenly cares about the title again?  Is Kevin Nash going to interfere again and is anyone ever going to explain why he’s even around?  Like seriously, the big payoff to the angle was that he sent himself the text message…so why did he do that? My head hurts. Expect Nash to pop up from under the ring after a text message from Johnny Ace and powerbomb one of the babyfaces, just so everyone knows not to give a crap about Del Rio even in victory.
Winner, and new champion:  Alberto Del Rio.

Rhett Davis:  John Cena did the predictable two weeks ago (seriously? Only two weeks?) by winning the WWE Championship and I don’t see this changing hands here.  This is just a way for Alberto del Rio to say that ‘Cena didn’t pin me so I need my rematch.’  And with Vengeance only what? Two or three weeks away why would they start working on a new feud for Cena?  Cena vs Del Rio at Vengeance.  Therefore after Punk is slaughtered against the Cell, Cena will pick up with the win with the Attitude Adjustment.
:  SuperCena
M.C. Brown: Not sure why Cena won for him to lose it here again so quickly. So I see Cena staying alive.
Winner: John Cena

World Heavyweight Championship

Mike Gojira: With Cody wanting revenge on Orton for busting him open, I can see the plan is to make it look like Orton might just overcome Sexual Chocolate but fall short due to the former Dashing One.  The inevitable break-out face push for Sheamus is waiting in the wings, and Henry is the guy who will put him over.  Egads…did I just say Henry would be used to put someone ELSE over?  And did I really use the word “egads”?
Winner: Mark Henry

Chris Sanders: I feel like this is almost a full circle in the tale of Mark Henry. His stock rose tremendously months ago when he beasted the Big Show through a cage and now he’s in a similar situation with Randy Orton. This one is kinda hard for me to pick at this moment and a rushed PPV doesn’t help much. I think WWE is waiting to build somebody up to “slay the monster” and for some reason, I don’t think they want Randy for that. This could be a fun match full of gratuitous amounts of sweat (Henry) and an overload of “rape face” (Orton) but in the end, the monster wins.
Winner: Mark Henry

Steven Gepp: This should be Michaels v Undertaker sort of dynamic, with Orton the little pinball bouncing off the big lug. I just hope they don’t do the screwy ending so Henry loses. I think he should be champ until WrestleMania to give him and the title some credibility.
Winner: Henry

Scott Keith:  I really, really hope that they don’t go with their natural urge to blow this off already and put the title back on Orton, but this is kind of a corner they’ve painted themselves into.  You can’t really elevate things more than Hell in a Cell, and they’re only fighting in the Cell because it’s that time of year, rather than for a more logical reason like “They need to keep interference away” or “They really dislike each other”.  Orton’s got three feuds going on right now (Christian, Cody Rhodes and Henry) and Sheamus seems like a more logical choice to be chasing the belt for a few months, so the logical decision would be Henry retaining and Orton doing something else for a few PPVs.  Logic rarely enters things here, though.  I think they’re gonna feel the need to pull the trigger on Orton’s big comeback win way, way too soon.
Winner, and new champion:  Randy Orton.

Rhett Davis:  After that dominating performance by Mark Henry at the last PPV, I can’t see him just handing the title right back to Orton.  Although I think this match will be much more close than their previous encounter.  I think Mark will still win, but will probably kick out of an RKO during the match to prove that he can indeed take an RKO.  So for the finish I see Orton Hulking up, hits the RKO, looks like the end, Mark kicks out, Orton perhaps hits another RKO, Mark still kicks out, Mark gets back to his feet, Orton looks devestated, Henry hits the World’s Strongest Slam followed by the World’s Smallest Jump Splash to put away the Viper.
Winner:  Sexual Chocolate
M.C. Brown: Cody interferes and preserves Henry’s reign which clearly has not been established enough to take it away yet.
Winner: Mark Henry

Divas’ Championship

Mike Gojira: Mercifully end this.  Let the Glamazon win, and then AJ could get a title shot!  I know Floyd would LOVE that feud!
I’m banned from future Roundtables, aren’t I? (Editor’s Note: Yes. You are.)
Winner and New Divas’ Champion: Beth Phoenix

Chris Sanders: For some reason, WWE wanted this feud to continue past Night of Champions and I really don’t care why so I’m not going to use up to much brain power and saw that WWE is gonna make things the way it should be and all would be right in the Universe.
Winner: Beth Phoenix

Steven Gepp: I’ve been burnt too often by these two. Kelly Kelly is not a good wrestler. I don’t care how much she’s improved. Adding fins to a Ford Pinto still makes it a Ford Pinto, just flashier. Beth Phoenix is reaching Lex Luger levels of not winning the “big one.” I want Nattie v Beth at Wrestlemania, so…
Winner: Beth Phoenix

Scott Keith:  They pretty much HAVE to put the title on Beth now, don’t they?
Winner:  I’m tempted to say Kelly Kelly by another fluke rollup, but it’s gotta be Beth Phoenix.

Rhett Davis:  Thanks WWE for making a somewhat compelling Divas’ angle have no meaning at all.  This match is absolutely lose-lose.  If Kelly wins, then Beth looks like a chump who shouldn’t even be in the Bella Twins’ league, but Kelly looks strong so she can move on to… yeah who? Natalya?  The lesser half of the Divas of Doom?  Pfft. If Kelly loses, then it took THREE attempts for Beth to defeat Kelly Kelly and makes Kelly Kelly look insignificant anyways.  So yeah lose-lose.  The only choice is to have the Glamazon win and win through a difficult match-up or else this whole this was for naught.  Funny I think I said that at SummerSlam and Night of Champions as well..
:  Punk’s Mistress
M.C. Brown: Confidence in Kelly does not equal best decision for right now. Plus we aren’t in the contender’s hometown anymore.
Winner(and new champion): Beth Phoenix

Sheamus vs Christian

Mike Gojira: Look, we all know this is it for Christian in the main event scene.  He’ll make Sheamus look like gold, do the J.O.B. and then join the conspiracy lawsuit.
Winner: Sheamus

Chris Sanders: For some reason, I just believe this is a stepping stone match for face-Sheamus unless Christian and his new collective of sue-happy Superstars come out and interfere but I see this as another match for them to be mad at which means only one outcome.
Winner: King Pastey (Sheamus)
Steven Gepp: The match you have to keep 2 guys in the spotlight when you don’t have anything better for them to do. The winner of the HiaC is going to dictate who wins here. I think heel wins HiaC, so…
: Sheamus
Scott Keith:  This one pretty much has to be considered a sure thing. Sheamus is on fire as a babyface, and Christian is the cowardly heel. Unless they want to stretch this to Vengeance with a non-finish, Sheamus should be going over here bigtime and chasing for the World title soon.
Winner:  Sheamus.
Rhett Davis:  So why didn’t they just give this match the moniker #1 Contender’s match?  Oh yeah because we’re going to get Orton/Henry III in a few weeks.  This just feels like a forced feud, and I really don’t feel much animosity between these two combatants.  Sheamus has been on a role, and Christian really hasn’t.   Usually that’s a sign that Christian will win, but Sheamus is being pushed to the moon right now and he needs the win more than Christian who could always use more to complain about.

Winner:  Beaker

M.C. Brown: I like Christian’s act, but Sheamus has to be built up to contend for Henry’s belt.
Winner: Sheamus

Sin Cara (Hunico) vs Sin Cara (Mistico)

Mike Gojira: I honestly couldn’t care less.  The ‘E has spent the last month using Smackdown’s Money in the Bank winner as cannon fodder for a feud that will never draw money or elevate either guy because of this mask business.  Neither one of these guys will be at the level of popularity of Rey Mysterio, so the company is wasting its time.  Should be a lot of flips/botches/masked children, though.
Winner: Sin Cara (See what I did there?  Technically, I can’t lose this pick!)

Chris Sanders: Basically this is Heel Black Cara vs. Face Blue Cara, right? There’s not really much to say seeing as how this whole storyline is basically them pulling off their usual moves and then pointing at each other, not exactly what I call plot development. I mean, nobody really had any idea what was going on until finally Black Cara cut a promo where he actually spoke and even then, its hard to understand whats going on. So seeing as how Blue Cara is the one that WWE invested in originally…
: Blue Cara and all the kiddies are happy, yes? yes.

Steven Gepp: Easist. Pick. Ever.

Winner: Sin Cara




Steven Gepp: I am confused by all of this, but I’ll say:
: Bad Guy Sin CaraScott Keith:  This is going to die the most horrible death that a PPV match has ever died.  Mark my words.  The crowd is going to tune out like zombies after the first minute because no one understands or cares about this storyline, and pure lucha libre never translates well with American crowds.  I could be wrong, but the buildup doesn’t make me think so.
Winner:  The Dark Patriot.

Rhett Davis:  I’m going to re-name this Hunico vs Mistico.  After watching SmackDown Friday, I’m really excited to see where this goes.  I’m sure I’ll be disappointed, but hey it’s something out of the ordinary.  I honestly prefer Hunico, but I’d like to see both of these guys stick around.  I’d honestly had liked to have seen them as a tag team.  A couple of masked guys teaming would be different from the WWE usual.  Seriously name the last WWE masked tag duo.  Yeah I couldn’t think of any in the last few years either.  Honestly Hurricane and Rosey are the only ones I can think of at the moment.  And they were Super Heroes not luchadores so it’s different.  Anyways back to the match, I think Mistico will win just because he can’t talk and the mask would aid him in that avenue moreso than Hunico who can cut a promo.  However, I’d prefer he just changed his name and kept the mask.
Winner:  The Face… Face-Less (Sin Cara means Face-Less in case you didn’t know…)
M.C. Brown: Undertaker vs. Undertaker. Kane vs. Kane. These matches do not end well and the original wins them and moves on.
Winner: ORIGINAL Sin

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