We’re here LIVE with coverage of tonight’s big pay per view event – The Rock teaming up for “one night only” with John Cena to face The Miz & R-Truth in the main event. Oh and two title matches. AT THE GARDEN. Jimmy Hart, what do you think?
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Johnny Ace comes out first – or is it Super Dave? – to say it’s the 25th anniversary of SurSer but also the 10th anniversary of his time with teh company. Yay.
US CHAMPIONSHIP – DOLPH ZIGGLER [c] vs. JOHN MORRISON
I blink and Ziggler retains the US Heavyweight Championship over John Morrison with the Zig Zag.
Winner and STILL champion – the artist formerly known as Nicky!
BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE. Madison Square Garden, you see, is RIGHT ABOVE PENN STATION, and what runs into Penn Station you ask? The LONG ISLAND Railroad. Zack Ryder, knowing this, answers the fan chants and comes out. Gets beat on. But then hits his move on Zigg who runs like a baby.
WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP – BETH PHOENIX [c] vs. EVE TORRES
This is really a match? Sigh. I guess it’s a holding pattern in the women’s division until Layla gets back. Ha. Oh and Beth wins. And there are lumberjills, whatever that means.
BACKSTAGE Otunga says Johnny Ace wants Punk to apologize to Cole; CM says sure, but he will win the WWE title first.
The ROCK time. History lesson, talks about MSG and its rich history in all of sports and of course WWF/E, with his grandfather wrestling here, his debut here, etc. Great stuff.
TEAM ORTON VS. TEAM BARRETT
I love these traditional Survivor Series matches. We’ve got these babyfaces: Orton, Sheamus, Sin Cara, Kofi and Evan Bourne, who after seeing him, I can totally understand how he was suspended for a wellness policy violation. Wait, that’s Mason Ryan? Oh nevermind. And on the heel side it’s Ziggler, Hunico, Rhodes, Swagger and Wade.
TEAM BARRETT wins! Eliminations, in order: Ziggler (pinned by Orton); Sin Cara (injured by Hunico); Mason Ryan (pinned by Rhodes); Kingston (pinned by Barrett); Sheamus (DQ’d after beating on Swagger past a 5 count); Hunico (pinned by Orton); Orton (pinned by Barrett). Survivors: Barrett and Rhodes.
TO THE BACK~! Twins flirting! But Del Rio is told by Johnny Ace to take his match seriously. Del Rio doesn’t need John, so Laurinaitis texts someone (maybe the anonymous GM?).
Next up – reinforcing the ring for:
WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP – MARK HENRY [c] vs. BIG SHOW
Started as a typical big man match, with a Daniel Bryan chant that COLE responded to by saying he wasn’t in the building due to the recent Henry beatdown on Smackdown. Then things picked up. Show thrown through the guardrail a la Henry/Sheamus at Summerslam… Show top rope Macho Man elbow. Show superkick. Henry… LOW BLOW. DQ. Done. Ha.
Winner but NOT champion – Big Show.
After the match, ANOTHER WWE recall to past events, with Show Pilmanizing Henry’s leg with a legdrop on a chair, and causing him to have to be helped to the back. No Daniel Bryan or Kane, but solid match regardless.
BACKSTAGE Barrett says he wants to be champion, and Miz and Truth cut a promo on pigeons and crap.
WWE CHAMPIONSHIP – ALBERTO DEL RIO [c] vs. CM PUNK
The crowd wants ice cream. I’d settle for a title change.
AND WE GOT ONE. Anaconda vice, submission, now PLEASE get rid of the spinner belt. Great stuff, with a long match, lots of reversals, and Del Rio may have taken a move from Carlito, but don’t quote me. Punk celebrated into the crowd a few times, but it’s time for the ROCK now, and we segue to a video package of Mr. Johnson’s wrestling career.
THE ROCK AND JOHN CENA vs. AWESOME TRUTH
Started off with Rock and Miz in the ring, then Truth and Rock, then Miz and Cena. Boy did the MSG crowd not love Cena! “You Still Got It” and “You Can’t Wrestle” chants ruled the day – guess which was for who…
About 20 minutes in, it was People’s Elbow time, and The Miz was the victim. 1-2-3 and Rock & Cena win!
Time for the official kick off to WrestleMania to begin… Rock and Cena take turns posing and talking smack, and it all ends with a Rock Bottom and Cena holding his back as he walked away and Rocky soaked in the crowd’s cheers.