Kyle’s Files: WWE Royal Rumble Review, Plus WrestleMania Predictions

Hey fellas, the WWE threw us that curveball  I was talking about in my last article and selected the Lobster Head Sheamus to win the Rumble as the 22nd participant. We will get to that later on the review of the Rumble, but before that we have the other matches to talk about.

Just for the record, I predicted 3 out of the 4 matches as well as its finish correctly. I don’t know if I’m just that good or the PPV was that predictable. Maybe a little bit of both.

 First Match: Daniel Bryan (c) vs. Big Show vs. Mark Henry –

Turning the MITB winner after he becomes champion in a cheap way a heel seems like lazy booking, but Daniel Bryan is an exception. In fact, Bryan’s heel turn (or teased heel turn) has been the best thing that could have happened to him. The reason for that is because he can win matches and it won’t affect the true WWE maineventer’s credibility (something the WWE is always worried about). He can also cheat/win in fluky ways and it won’t affect his credibility either, because its the way a heel should win a match.

If you compare Punk’s first run as champion to Daniel Bryan’s run, you can see the difference I am talking about. Punk won matches in fluky ways and never was allowed to look better than his opponents as a babyface, which made him look weak as a champion and made him less over. Meanwhile, Bryan is cheating and winning in cheap ways but it’s making him more of a credible (heel) champion and more over.

The match was probably the best it could’ve been with Mark Henry and Big Show in it, but it was still below par for a Daniel Bryan match. A Sheamus vs. Bryan match might have a stronger  chance of Bryan being able to show off what he’s capable of due to Sheamus being a serviceable worker and a contrast to past their prime wrestlers who simply don’t  match-up well for Bryan’s style or size.

Divas 8-way Tag

It was a divas match and it wasn’t announced, so there’s not much to say about it.

John Cena vs. Kane

This match didn’t accomplish anything as it didn’t extend the feud in a proper manner. Instead, it made me never want to see these two ever wrestle a match again because the booking and finish was that lame. Why would two people who hate each other want to try to wrestle and pin each other?

I mean the way WWE has overwhelmed are brains with oodles of non-finishes, people walking out on matches, and we could go on all day but you get the point and that is we know that who win doesn’t really mean much these days.

So, why aren’t these two just trying to kill each other? Wouldn’t that be the true thing that  Kane and Cena would be trying to accomplish instead of a  a meaningless pinfall that means nothing?

The only thing newsworthy that could come out of this feud is for Cena to turn on Ryder and Eve to become a heel in time for his match with the Rock. I am not going to hold my breath for that, which means we just have to suffer through this filler/nonsensical  angle until the Rock-Cena hype begins.

Brodus Clay vs. Drew McIntrye

Somebody call Clay’s mama, because he won another match. I wrote about my thoughts on Clay in my previous article (which you should check out if you haven’t read it yet). I believe that this stupid angle for McIntrye isn’t going to help him or anyone out at all. He has talent and now they’re wasting it.

CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler

Wasn’t this match suppose to steal the show? Yeah, that didn’t happen. The match was going fine until they added the heavy overbooking into the match, which made the match lose all its momentum it had built up. CM Punk beat Ziggler 4 times to counter Ziggler beating him 4 times. Even-steven booking. The stuff with Johhny Ace just got very uninteresting, especially if he becomes an open-minded GM because of this.

30 Man Royal Rumble

I thought they did a great job in booking this match in the beginning. The comedy presented by Foley, Santino, and especially Richardo Rodriguez was gold. The announcers all being in the match and then announcing after they were eliminated was a nice touch of comedy too.

The surprises weren’t all that specular this year aside from Kharma coming back and the lack of star power in the match hurt the match because it felt like a jobber royal at several points of the match. Let’s not forger to mention Big Show being one of the most underwhelming/disappointing number 30s ever. And on top of all that there weren’t many sub-plots or storylines in the Rumble match.

The match almost lost all its momentum at the end, but Jericho and Sheamus saved it with an excellent back and forth display with a lot of teased finishes combined with flat-out good wrestling.

They really did a great job of teasing when Jericho was going to win as he came closer and closer, but then Sheamus ended up winning the Rumble in a shocker. It was a roller-coaster done at its finest, although nothing is expected less from Jericho.

Overall: The PPV was fun but lacked greatness. The undercard matches ranged from meaningless to slightly above average while the Rumble match was very good but not enough to really say this PPV was worth the money. The PPV created intrigue from a “where are they going from here” perspective, but a Royal Rumble PPV shouldn’t be strictly a building block for Wrestlemania. It should have enough quality on it to please a paying fan of the product. This PPV didn’t.

WrestleMania Card Prediction:

Rock vs. Cena

This match is already set in stone and has been for almost a year. The match could be a train-wreck or really fun. Although I believe the crowd reaction will really help elevate this match similar to Hogan-Rock, which was an average at best match turned into a classic because of the atmosphere.

Chris Jericho  vs. CM Punk (c)

I wonder if they make the Elimination Chambers for the title or for a number one contender spot for Raw. It’s hard to see them not doing this match but it also hard to see them having two successful title reigns at the EC PPV. If a champion is going to lose, I suppose its Daniel Bryan and not CM Punk. Nevertheless, the WWE needs to build Jericho up a lot more in order for him to be worthy for this match if its the direction they’re heading. If this match does happen, it has MOTY written all over it.

Undertaker vs. HHH

This match is almost in concrete even though it hasn’t been officially added. I see a stipulation being added to this match with either HHH’s career on the line or both of their careers on the line. I also see HBK being the special referee for this match as well. I think this might be HHH’s last match (and possibly Taker’s as well) so I expect them to go all out and put on a great match.

Daniel Bryan (c) vs. Sheamus

I’m sticking with this match even though I believe a title will switch at the Elimination Chamber. Although it might be a good match, there is no heat between the two and it feels like Del Rio vs. Edge all over again. Hopefully the WWE can give us some reason to look forward to this match because it could be really good.


I don’t know all the participants that will be in this match, but I do see Christian winning it this year for some reason.

Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton –

I see this being some kind of NO DQ match if it does happen.

That’s all I can predict right now. I’m sure they’ll be more on it. If the card looks like this, I really do believe that this might be one of the best Manias in a while. In fact, it might be so good that it makes up for last year’s snooze fest.

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