Not Tubular, Dude: Michael Bay Wants To Make Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Into Aliens

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is now Teenage Alien Intergalactic Ninja Turtles (aka TAINT)

When Paramount Pictures shuffled some of its releases around for 2012 and 2013, one project stood out. The studio had a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles pic penciled for Christmas 2013. Up until now, Warner Bros. has handled the Ninja Turtles as a film property dating all the back to the first film’s release in 1990 up through the 2007 CGI-enhanced TMNT.

But Paramount, along with Nickelodeon and Michael Bay’s Platinum Dunes production company, is looking to reboot the franchise in live-action form (with Wrath of the Titans‘ Jonathan Liebesman as director) by altering the origins of the Ninja Turtles.

Apparently, they will no longer be mutants.

At the recent Nickelodeon Upfront event in New York Bay told those in attendance that these reptiles would be an alien race.

Bay explained his vision for the 2013 remake: “When you see this movie, kids are going to believe, one day, that these turtles actually do exist when we are done with this movie.” He then followed that with, “The turtles are from an alien race, and they are going to be tough, edgy, funny, and completely loveable.”

For those not familiar with the original concept of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, they were four orphaned turtles who, after crawling in some mysterious mutant ooze, morphed into two-footed turtles who are trained in the art of being ninja by a rat named Splinter, who also mutated. Each turtle is named after Renaissance artists (Leonardo, Raphael, Donatello, and Michaelangelo). The four fight crime from their home base in the sewers of New York City.

The Pulse from Mike Noyes: Wait… what? Michael Bay, you’re going to take a beloved franchise with tons of hardcore fans and do something irrationally stupid like change the entire origin of the characters? The internet has been ablaze with backlash over this statement with fanboys hoping and praying that their collective voice would be heard and Bay would change his mind.

Well, Bay has spoken, but I don’t think it’s going to make anyone happy, “Fans need to take a breath, and chill. They have not read the script,” he wrote. “Our team is working closely with one of the original creators of Ninja Turtles to help expand and give a more complex back story. Relax, we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world.” He went on to add, “When you see this movie, kids are going to believe, one day, that these turtles actually do exist when [we] are done with this movie.”

Cause English speaking pizza loving alien Ninja Turtles with a Rat sensei (presumably from the same planet somehow) is more believable than some sewer critters getting hit by some radioactive ooze?

I think Bay has directed three too many Transformers films. Not everything needs to be from outer space to make sense. In fact, nothing about this makes sense. Sure, the Ninja Turtles origin is a little silly, but it’s part of who they are and part of the charm of what makes them them. To change that changes the very essence of where these characters came from and who they are. And if Michael Bay can’t understand that basic concept he’s an even worse filmmaker than I ever thought.

Robbie Rist (Michelangelo in the original live action films) wrote in a letter to Bay that he posted online (via TMZ). “I know believing in mutated talking turtles is kinda silly to begin with but am I supposed to be led to believe there are ninjas from another planet? The rape of our childhood memories continues.”

What do you think? Do you care that Bay is making these changes? Will you see the film anyway or will you boycott based on principle?

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