THE RAGER! Lets Watch Some Smackdown, eh?

Columns, Top Story

Welcome to another edition of THE RAGER

My name is Chris, follow me on twitter @cwsanders39 and be amazed!

So I don’t have too much to say about Raw other than Brock needs a handler for his mic skills (not naming any names or anything) and so I decided I would catch this super special live Smackdown and share my thoughts as I write this. I know it’s not very original but just go with it, ok?

This Old School Smackdown automatically loses points for me because there’s no old school set.

I’ve got to really scratch my head over the whole Sheamus kicking a ref thing. Did they need some situation to make Sheamus land in hot water with Laurinaitis? Because I’m quite sure they could’ve done that just by keeping Sheamus a face (it’s not that far off of what they’ve done in the past).

Orton vs Mark Henry

Watching these two go at it reminded of their rivalry last year and so I’m pretty alright with this booking so far.
Orton probably slipped out of the world strongest slame because of being overly oiled (I’d give it a 6 out of 10 on the Oiltunga-Meter).

Kane gets Randy Orton’s attention by pulling a Randy Orton and attacking a close family member (Cowboy Bob Orton for those keeping score). And sure its sad to see Cowboy Bob get attacked like that but it was still good to see that his hand finally healed.

Randy finally finds his dad (after running right by it initially) and Kane attacks from behind, leaving Orton laid out at the bottom of a staircase (Orton really has bad luck near stairs, lately and eventually, he’s gonna be terrified every time he tries to enter the ring).

Legends watch Ryback squash some kid and he sure looked fantastic in the process.

Mick Foley comes out to do commentary! That’s really all I wanted to touch on because I could’ve done without the rest of events that ensued but Tyson Kidd did get some camera time and I’m definitely alright with that.

Gotta admit that I was hoping for another “FEEL THE ENERGY” moment in this edition of Piper’s Pit but alas, we did not. Instead we got Piper mediating AJ and Bryan while also trying to set Bryan in his place and I believe he did a pretty good job. Although Piper casually knocking over the barstools seemed greatly irresponsible (we’ve all seen Million Dollar Baby). I will note that WWE really is throwing in some “Emotionally Abusive Relationship” tones into this and actually feels slightly organic (no pun intended).

Drew McIntyre and Bella vs Khali, Alicia Fox and Natalia
Battle of the “ladies men?”

Don’t flatter yourself, Drew Mac, Bellas were strictly arm-candy for over a year once. Drew Mac bails on the match and, to be honest, so did I. Thankfully, it all ends fairly quickly thanks to Alicia Fox.

Oh no, Mae Young. Is it bad enough you gave birth to a hand? Can we just stop having her wobble out? It’s getting really sad.

Damien Sandow, I’m stoked

Hacksaw vs Hunico

Really? Why? Oh that’s right, put Hacksaw against a foreigner.
And here comes Sgt. Slaughter and Hacksaw lays down the wood and there goes the USA chants.

Cody Rhodes is joined by Daddy

Big Show pops in for some reason and once again, it should’ve been Goldust. Wouldn’t that have been perfect after Cody gets to the brink of throwing a tantrum for being embarrassed?

Show airs one of Cody’s old Dashing How-to Videos and that’s apparently suppose to embarrass him even further. Um he was/is dashing for a reason, Show, and I haven’t come across a single wrestling fan that doesn’t love those videos. Joke’s on you, Show, but your Dusty Rhodes impression was funny…so…you know…there’s that.

Daniel Bryan and Alberto Del Rio vs Sheamus and Mean Gene Okerlund

All the legends decide to come out to assist Mean Gene and this has just gotten ridiculous.

Ricardo takes all the bumps from the legends for some very strange reason. Is it because they know Del Rio is gonna act like a Diva if it has to be him? I love Ricardo so much more as a character than Del Rio.

Michael Cole gets in the ring because apparently the legends needs to feed a little bit more.

Well my final conclusion was that Smackdown was kind of a waste for the sake of a few nostalgia pops and yes, some were enjoyable but some were just off. I do like the 2 out 3 falls booking for Sheamus and Daniel Bryan, I believe it fits well into the narrative of the overall story. Daniel Bryan believed it was a cheap shot and unfair so now this booking ensures it gets settled. The only other way to go with this would be an Iron Man match or something but I’m quite sure WWE isn’t quite THAT invested in this story.

Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do twice,
Chris

The Answer: The theme for Monday Night Raw was “facepalm” due to the stooging and “erectile-dysfunctioning” shenanigans.

Chris is a writer from Fayetteville, NC. He's the co-creator of Irrelevant But Awesome Productions which produces podcasts you all know and love like Classy Ring Attire, Trashy Ring Attire and The Disney Magic Podcast. You can keep up with everything on twitter by following @IBAStudios and @CWSanders39