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Let’s take a look at the card –
1. Bobby Roode vs. James Storm *TNA World Heavyweight Championship Match
2. Eric Bischoff, Gunner, Bully Ray, Chris Daniels & Kazarian vs. Garett Bischoff, AJ Styles, Mr. Anderson, Austin Aries & Rob Van Dam *Lethal Lockdown
3. Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle
4. Samoa Joe & Magnus vs. The Motor City Machine Guns *TNA World Tag Team Title Match
5. Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky *TNA Knockouts Championship Match
6. Devon vs. Robbie E *TNA Television Championship Match
7. Matt Morgan vs. Crimson
We open with James Storm talking about his match with TNA World Champion Bobby Roode, and he says this is his town. This segues to the opening video package focused on the main event.
Next we go backstage, where Team Garett gathers to talk strategy. Garett wants to start the match so he can earn his teammates’ respect. They all agree.
MATCH #1: Lethal Lockdown – Team Garett Bischoff vs. Team Eric Bischoff
Garett and Gunner start the match. They do some basic back and forth, and Gunner uses his power to take control. After three minutes Bully Ray makes his way out, and this looks bad for Garett. Gunner and Bully use the two-on-one advantage to work over the future of the business. TNA X Division Champion Austin Aries comes out to even the odds, and he has a score to settle with Bully Ray. The numbers edge goes back to Team Eric when a shorn Kazarian makes his way out. AJ Styles evens the score next and slams the cage door on Kazarian’s head. Chris Daniels is next out for Team Eric, and they are generally in control of this match so far. Mr. Anderson is the fourth man out for Team Garett and he helps swing the momentum in their favor. So we know now that Eric Bischoff and Rob Van Dam will be the last two men in the ring. Eric makes his way out and holds his own kid so that his teammates can abuse him. Finally RVD make his way out and the roof comes down to officially make weapons available. From this point forward first pin or submission wins the match.
Team Garett uses the weapons to their advantage as Eric cowers in a corner. The action gets a little hard to follow and finishers start coming from all over the place. Somehow Daniels and Eric are the last two men standing. Garett comes back and hits Daniels with a Flatliner and covers, but Earl Hebner has his head up his ass and doesn’t count. Eric grabs a kendo stick and beats his son with it as the crowd chants for Hogan. Eventually Garett is able to grab a guitar and he hits his old man with it to get the pin and hopefully send this angle into obscurity.
WINNERS – Team Garett Bischoff (**½)
MATCH #2: TNA World Tag Team Championship Match – The Motor City Machine Guns vs. Samoa Joe & Magnus
I have high hopes for this match. Magnus and Shelley start the match and they take it to each other quickly. Shelley takes the advantage and tags Sabin for some double-teaming. Everyone gets a chance to go in the early going but the Guns seem to be the more well-oiled machine in the opening minutes. The champs are able to take over on Sabin and they work him over in their half of the cage. Sabin comes back with a DDT and makes the tag to Shelley, but the champs cut him off and are right back in control. Joe and Magnus go for a double superplex but Sabin brings Joe down with a powerbomb. Shelley knocks Magnus down and follows with a double stomp for two. The Guns use some double-teams but can’t put either champion away. Moments later the Champs are able to hit their finisher on Shelley to get the pin and retain the titles.
WINNERS – Samoa Joe & Magnus (***¼)
Backstage – Jeremy Borash gets a word with Robbie E and Robbie T. E promises to regain the TV Title tonight. I can’t believe this is the best they can do for this Championship.
MATCH #3: TNA Television Championship Match – Robbie E vs. Devon
There is just no part of this match I care about. E keeps Devon on the mat with his terrible offense and boring rest holds. Devon comes back with his usual offense and he’s just fat. He wins the match with a spinebuster in like 3 minutes.
WINNER – Devon (*)
Rob Terry attacks after the bell and E joins him in the attack. Seriously, is this feud going to continue after that?
Backstage – Borash gets a word with Matt Morgan, who promises revenge on his former Tag Team Championship partner Crimson tonight. That match is not next.
MATCH #4: TNA Knockouts Championship – Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky
Gail is accompanied by Madison Rayne. The champion takes the early advantage and goes to work. Gail focuses on the back as Rayne cheers her on. This goes on for several minutes until Velvet makes the comeback with a flurry of offense, including the bulldog. They fight up to the top rope and Velvet sunset bombs Gail down to the mat. Moments later Gail gets an O’Connor Roll and uses the tights to secure the pin and retain the title.
WINNER – Gail Kim (**)
Ric Flair makes his way out to the cage. He rambles on about the usual stuff, and he’s pissed off about something. He makes fun of a fat guy in the audience and then Hulk Hogan comes out. They argue like a couple of old men and take forever to arrive to a point. They never get to one, and Hogan punches him out. What a waste of time.
MATCH #5: Matt Morgan vs. Crimson
They start off slugging and Morgan avoids a charge, causing Crimson to crash into the cage. Morgan almost leaves the cage but decides not to. Weird. Crimson fights back and stomps Morgan in the corner. They battle to the top of the cage and Crimson knocks Morgan down, crotching him on the top rope. Morgan gets tangled in the ropes and Crimson climbs out of the cage and wins. That was insanely dull.
WINNER – Crimson (*½)
MATCH #6: Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Hardy
Angle dominates from the early going, keeping Hardy on the mat. Hardy comes back and hits Whisper in the Wind. He goes to the top rope and Angle takes him down with the Olympic Slam. I just can’t get over how much better than Undertaker versus Triple H this match is, right Kurt? Hardy tries to crawl out of the cage but Angle pulls him back in with the Ankle Lock, and Hardy reverses to an Ankle Lock of his own! Angle fights out and Hardy hits him with the Twist of Fate. Hardy goes to the top and hits the Swanton but only gets two. They continue trading finishers but neither man can keep the other one down. Hardy goes all the way to the top of the cage and hits the Swanton and that’s enough to get the pin.
WINNER – Jeff Hardy (***)
MATCH #7: TNA Knockouts Tag Team Title Match – Eric Young & ODB vs. Rosita & Sarita
Of course ODB is in the ring to start and gets beat up since they need to be careful how much Eric Young beats up women. Eventually ODB drinks liquor and gets fired up. The crowd does not care. After an eternity ODB gets the pin.
WINNERS – ODB & Eric Young (½*)
Backstage – Borash gets a word with Bobby Roode, who promises to retain his title tonight and beat James Storm in his own hometown. He says it’s a fight and he’s out for blood.
MATCH #8: TNA World Championship Match – James Storm vs. Bobby Roode
Storm wastes no time and takes it right to Roode on the floor. Roode fights back and throws Storm around ringside and busts him open. Finally they make it into the cage and Roode is in total control. Storm fires up and the crowd is hot for him but Roode cuts him off. Roode continues the assault and talks trash to him while he does it. Storm fires up again and throws a back body drop into his attack. He catapults Roode head-first into the cage and then continues whipping him into the steel walls. Storm hits the Lungblower but is only able to get two. Roode is busted open now too, but he’s able to backdrop Storm into the cage. He traps Storm in the Crippler Crossface and Storm reaches the ropes. Roode tries to escape the cage but Storm drags him back in. Storm has a chance to climb out of the cage but then decides not to when Roode flips him off, and Storm comes back in with a super Codebreaker. That was cool. Storm sets up for the Last Call but Roode pulls the referee in front of it. Referee Earl Hebner is still out on the floor and he opens the cage floor and helpfully hands Roode a beer bottle for to smash on Storm’s head. I HATE spots like that. Why would the referee help out one of the wrestlers? Storm has enough left to hit the Last Call, and then he hits another one that sends Roode through the cage door and Roode actually wins the match. Yeah, that just happened. Good match, terrible finish.
WINNER – Bobby Roode (***¾)
Tags: Bobby Roode, Hulk Hogan, impact wrestling, James Storm, lockdown, magnus, motor city machine guns, Samoa Joe, TNA