The Stomping Ground: Notes From A 30-Year-Old Man (Punk, Ryback, The Shield)

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It happened.

It finally happened.

The big 3-0!

Honestly, I don’t really feel any different than I did before, as the general ennui I feel toward the wrestling product these days hasn’t exactly worsened or improved. We’ve still got CM Punk as the WWE Champion, we’ve still got the John Cena/AJ Lee “scandal,” and we’ve still got Ryback’s bizarre push-and-pull momentum thanks to a rushed angle thrusting him into the spotlight.

I still maintain that one of the few things the WWE is doing right is Punk’s monumental title reign, which is set to surpass John Cena’s next week. In all honesty, the length of the reign will mean nothing to me after that, as in this day and age the company won’t put Cena on a similar quest simply because of the backlash they’d suffer from the 50% who boo him in the crowd. CM Punk’s run as WWE Champion will be a testament to his ability in the ring and on the mic; it’s just a shame he had to go the cowardly heel route in order to hold onto the belt.

Dolph Ziggler is feuding with John Cena, and I can’t say that I’m one bit interested. Ziggler will get a win eventually (if the bookers are smart) but we all know Cena will triumph in the end. It’s just a placeholder feud until they decide when to pull the trigger on Money in the Bank. Oh, and I definitely LOOOOOVE the fact that the WWE placed emphasis on Cena’s wife in the crowd months before their divorce proceedings, yet without ever addressing it the WWE allowed him to hook up with AJ. If one were to go this entire year without knowledge of the divorce, while also believing that the show is legit and not-at-all scripted, he or she’d most likely call shenanigans from the get-go.

Can’t wait to see Alberto del Rio add Rosa Mendes as his valet. That means more Rosa on my TV screen!

I was thinking about doing a return column on the tag team division since it’s alleged rebirth, but I’ll wait to cast judgment until, oh, around Wrestlemania.

What is with Ryback’s push? This is what happens when you have two angles that are red-hot and are forced to meet at an intersection because of poor booking (Ryback’s undefeated streak and Punk’s uninterrupted title run). Cena’s injury notwithstanding, the WWE could have thrown ANY midcard face into the Hell in a Cell match with CM Punk just to test the waters. Then Ryback wouldn’t be forced to lose the next two PPVs in “controversial fashion” just to maintain his heat. Want Ryback to beat Punk for the title? Have him win it in their first meeting….AFTER Wrestlemania XXIX. Build the guy up to be a real monster.

And now for The Shield. I have to get straight to the point here: unlike many of you, I have not seen anything of Dean Ambrose either on the mic or in the ring, so I can’t just jump on the IWC bandwagon of, “He’s awesome!” I know he has the endorsement of Mick Foley and Jim Ross, but so have many others who have come before him. Show me what you got, kid! I’ve seen a little bit of Seth Rollins from his days as Tyler Black, but not enough to “Wow” me. Roman Reigns is a complete mystery to me, other than his background as Samoan wrestling royalty. Here’s hoping they don’t go the way of the Nexus.

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

P.S. – Thanks for all the birthday wishes, guys!

Since February of 2011, "The Master of Smarkasm" Mike Gojira has tickled the funny bones of Inside Pulse readers with his insightful comedy, timely wit, and irreverent musings on the world of professional wrestling. Catch his insanely popular column, The Stomping Ground, whenever he feels like posting a new edition (hey, I've earned the right). He is also totally modest and doesn't know the meaning of hyperbole.