Welcome to the Extreme Rules 2013 Rasslin’ Roundtable. I am your host, Rhett Davis and remember that the People Power pick was decided by the Pulse Polls that went up earlier in the week. After the PPV concludes on Sunday, I will add up the total correct picks for each voter (including the People Power vote) and add it to the already established running tally of votes. You can see the running total on the Roundtable Repercussions later on in the week. So without any more delays…
Divas Championship
Kaitlyn (c) vs. AJ Lee
Steven Gepp: Probably has the potential to be the best women’s match on WWE in years, but it’ll go less than 2 minutes and be worthless.
Winner: AJ
BD: They’re still doing Diva matches? Jesus.
Winner: No One Cares
KON: More than a year in the making and it still isn’t likely to make the final card. It’d be the perfect time to out Kaitlyn’s secret admirer, but it’s not going to happen.
Winner and still Diva’s Champion: Kaitlyn (because the match wont happen)
Rhett Davis: If this gets on the card, it’ll just be to give the belt over to AJ. Or maybe they’ll do it at the next PPV so Dolph Ziggler and her can both be winners… hmmm… I’ll say if this match does happen, which is highly doubtful, then Kaitlyn wins via rollup. Enough to postpone this feud to next month.
Winner (and STILL Divas Champion): Kaitlyn
Mike Gojira: IF this match happens (and that’s a big “If” with time constraints), I don’t see it going for more than a minute or so. That being the case, I see Kaitlyn retaining.
Winner: Kaitlyn
CB: I don’t think this match is actually on the card, or at least it’s not official, but I’ll play along. I love AJ Lee’s Octopus submission move, and I do like that the Kaitlyn-AJ story actually has some history. I say give AJ the pink gold belt and let her and Dolph get that image of both of them holding the titles. Up next, let Big E win the IC belt, too, unless they do what I suggest below for the I Quit Match.
Winner: AJ Lee
People Power: In a safe lead, AJ Lee wins the ‘People Power’s’ vote with 73% of the vote.
The Tally: Kaitlyn – 3
AJ Lee – 3
No One Cares – 1
Extreme Rules Pre-Show Match
The Miz vs. Cody Rhodes
Steven Gepp: I think Cody is better than this. Miz is being pushed as a winning babyface. John Morrison is due back, probably as an arrogant heel. Heel Morrison + face Miz = Instafeud, but arse about tit.
Winner: Miz (but expect JoMo to make at least a token appearance)
BD: These two don’t belong on the pre-show! They belong on the ring crew.
Winner: No One Cares
KON: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Winner: Both Miz and Cody get to go back to the hotel and drown their sorrows before the actual PPV starts, so everyone wins.
Rhett Davis: Oh jeez… this is absolutely pathetic. They would’ve been better to have a 6 Man Tag Match with Miz with Tons of Funk vs. Antonio Cesaro and The Rhodes Scholars. At least that way they had SOME sort of feud going with Tons of Funk and The Rhodes Scholars. But instead we get the oh-so-thrown-together match-up of Miz and Rhodes. Obviously Miz wins this as this is one of his first matches back.
Winner: The Miztake
Mike Gojira: Does anyone actually care about this match? Neither guy is doing much of anything and the WWE insists on marketing The Miz as the second coming of kid-friendly John Cena through his media relations. With that in mind, I think the victor is obvious…
Winner: The Miz
Justin C: I honestly don’t know why this match is happening. To get the Miz back on TV and get a win that really doesn’t mean much in the end? Okay. At this point, Cody Rhodes is the heel worker who can have a solid match with anyone on the roster and looks good in the process, but doesn’t pick up the win in the end. Knowing that, Miz picks up the win here and starts to get himself back into the Intercontinental Title scene.
Winner: Miz
CB: Is The Miz trying to break a PPV Pre Show record for most appearances? This is just sad all the way around.
Winner: No One Cares, but at least Miz isn’t going to crash your house party in his underwear.
People Power: With a definite lead, The Miz wins the ‘People Power’s’ vote with 83% of the vote.
The Tally: The Miz – 5
No One Cares – 3
Cody Rhodes – 0
United States Championship
Kofi Kingston (c) vs. Dean Ambrose
Steven Gepp: I think this will be essentially a squash match, Kofi will hit the trouble in paradise kick, Ambrose will ,manage to kick out, then Kofi will be killed.
Winner: Dean Ambrose
BD: Cool, I didn’t even know this was happening. I dig Ambrose a lot, and I’ve always had a soft spot for Kofi. No way he’s getting out of this with the belt or anything, but it should be fun regardless.
Winner (and new United States Champion): Dean Ambrose
KON: Kofi receives his life force from mid-card title reigns, so he can drop the belt and live well until his manna reserves are depleted in 12 months.
Winner, and new US Champion: Dean Ambrose
Rhett Davis: I’m glad they added this match, and honestly this is the most intriguing matchup on the card to me with maybe the tag match as the only exception. Hmm, the matches involving The Shield. Well I don’t see any point in Kofi retaining here so I’ll say that Dean Ambrose wins this with a distraction courtesy of the other members of The Shield.
Winner (and NEW United States Champion): Dean Ambrose
Mike Gojira: Besides the allegations that Creative has soured on Antonio Cesaro, the transference of the United States Championship to Cannon Fodder…I mean, Kofi Kingston makes sense, given that you can’t switch belts between two heels in a one-on-one situation. Therefore…..
Winner and NEW Champion: Dean Ambrose
Justin C: When Kofi won the US Title a month ago, I wondered what the point was of having him do so. Now the answer appears to be clear. Kofi was to be the transition Champion. It appears that the WWE knows who the top star of The Shield is. They’ve decided to give Dean Ambrose a singles match on the card because they trust him and feel he is the best worker in the group. Ambrose wrestled a singles match with The Undertaker, and you have to believe he gave Ambrose his approval. Ambrose wins the US Title here.
Winner: Dean Ambrose
CB: This should be a very fun match to watch and I think Kofi is a great person for Ambrose to get the singles spotlight with. Make no mistake about it, Kofi is simply enhancement talent for Ambrose here, and this will be The Shield’s first of two golden wins tonight.
Winner: Dean Ambrose
People Power: Firmly in the lead, Dean Ambrose wins the ‘People Power’s’ pick with 86% of the total vote.
The Tally: Dean Ambrose – 8
Kofi Kingston – 0
WWE Tag Team Championship Tornado Tag Team Match
Team Hell No! (Kane and Daniel Bryan) (c) vs. The Shield (Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns)
Steven Gepp: Completely expect this to be match of the night. This tag team thing has done Kane a world of good, as he has been having good matches and seems to be enjoying himself and not half-arsing his work, has kept Daniel Bryan in the limelight and has made at least one part of tag team wrestling interesting again. Then add the Shield which is possibly the most interesting thing in WWE at the moment. Yep, match of the night.
Winner: The Shield
BD: This will be a fun little outing, I imagine. I figure Shield takes the belts here, and Ambrose takes another one. Have Kane and Bryan go their separate ways (but don’t let how popular Bryan is despite being mid-card interfere with the juggernaut that is Shaemus) but don’t have them feud or anything. Just a split of the tag-team is all it needs to be. They can reunite every once in a while and have some fun.
Winners (and new Tag-Team Champions): The Shield
KON: The Shield gotta come out of this strong, right? It’s not like they’ve been jobbed out in a handicap match or anything.
Winners, and new Tag-Team Champions: Roman and Seth
Rhett Davis: This should be great as all of the other matches with the present company have been. If WWE is smart, they will put this well before their two main events as this will easily outshine them. Therefore, I can’t see Team Hell No! retaining here. It just looks like The Shield will take all of the gold in one fell swoop.
Winners (and NEW WWE Tag Team Champions): The Shield
Mike Gojira: It’s finally time to put the belts on the hottest team in the company. While I would have preferred a Freebirds-style team, I suppose it makes no sense logically to have a 2-on-3, given the way 3-on-3 matches have turned out when it comes to The Shield. This could be match of the night as far as I’m concerned.
Winners and NEW Champions: The Shield
Justin C: Team Hell No should have been broken up along time ago. At this point, they are just treading water. Nothing new has been added to the team in the last few months. I thought they were done at the Royal Rumble, then I thought they would be done at Wrestlemania. But they keep going. But they aren’t the hot act anymore, it is The Shield. They are the new thing in the WWE and I’m assuming will be the focus of WWE TV in the coming months. They pick up the win here after Reigns takes out Kane with a Spear.
Winners: Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns
CB: So who’s the weak link in this match again, Sanders? Sorry, couldn’t resist. The Shield will win this one and hopefully this will be the official end of the INCREDIBLE run that Team Hell No had as a team. I don’t want anything other than an amicable split, as we don’t need Bryan and Kane to really wrestle each other. Instead, let Bryan get back into the singles main event scene and have Kane keep working those high mid-card spots.
Winners: Rollins and Reigns
People Power: With yet another large lead, The Shield receives the ‘People Power’s’ pick with 91% of the total vote.
The Tally: The Shield – 8
Team Hell No! – 0
The Dancer Meets The Rocker Part II
Fandango vs. Chris Jericho
Steven Gepp: I hope this is a good match.
Winner: Fandango
BD: This match at WrestleMania wasn’t too bad, but it wasn’t all that good either. Johnny Curtis isn’t the most fun to watch, but he’s all right by me. Dude has a decent look, they gotta get him out of this dancing thing if they want anyone to take him seriously though, although it may be too late for that. Speaking of which, anyone who writes anything going beyond 2 weeks of dancing-related buildup for a match should be tried in the Hague.
Winner: Fandango
KON: I don’t really have an opinion on this. I’d like to see Fandango win, but i’d also like to see a lot of other stuff that clearly isn’t going to happen at extreme rules, or ever.
Winner: Chris Jericho
Rhett Davis: This is probably the hardest to call for me… Jericho desperately needs the win or else he looks like a total chump. However, I’m not sure this is the time to end the undefeated streak of Fandango. Granted, who better to lose it to than Jericho right? Therefore I’ll say Y2J wins here… that way these two collide so Fandango can get a little… ahem ‘Payback’ at the next PPV… Payback. See what I did there?
Winner: The Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla
Mike Gojira: Truth be told, Fandango bores me. His theme song is more over than he is and this is not a gimmick that will strap a rocket to your back and send you to the main event. Jericho COULD put Fandango over again like he did at ‘Mania, but the way their segment ended on Monday night leads me to believe that Curtis will be staring up at the lights.
Winner: Chris Jericho
Justin C: These two put on a good 10 minute match at Wrestlemania. I wish they would have gotten more time. I would like to think that would happen here, but there are more matches and one less hour of time to do so. So time may be a problem again. I really liked the opening segment between these two on RAW. It was a good way to gain some heat for Fandango. And Jericho’s serious promo at the end of RAW was solid too. We know Jericho is leaving again, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he has to lose here. I think Jericho finally gets a PPV win here with a roll up. After the match, Fandango takes out Jericho, giving an explanation for his next absence from WWE TV.
Winner: Chris Jericho
CB: “Dooooo do … Do do do do do Dooooo do …” yeah, the song’s catchy, but if Jericho is sticking around for a little while longer, I’d love to see Y2J win this one to set up a rubber match with Fandango, even if it’s on Raw tomorrow night depending on Jericho’s Fozzy obligations.
Winner: Chris Jericho
People Power: With a small margin, Chris Jericho receives the ‘People Power’s’ pick with 52% of the total vote.
The Tally: Chris Jericho – 6
Fandango – 2
Strap Match
Mark Henry vs. Sheamus
Steven Gepp: At least they’re in there with one another. Despite what Blair says, I have never been on the Sheamus bandwagon, and the smiling doofus is really getting more and more on my nerves. Also, despite what Blair says, I think the Henry monster thing could work. It won’t, but it could. But I think this match will be like that episode of Days Of Our Lives where Hope and Bo weren’t together, but pretended they were together and yet were having pretend-real arguments so they could mess with the minds of everyone around them and make Stefano (who had only died 4 times at this point) divorce Marlena (who was with John Black, but Roman was still around, causing issues), because what happened was they had a fight, which was supposed to be real (because they were faking liking one another, but really hating one another, remember), but everyone saw through it and thought it was ridiculous and overstaged, but it was real, and it forced them to actually like each other and hook up again. So what I’m saying is, after this match expect ‘Red Licorice’ to be a new tag team.
Winner: Sheamus
BD: First of all, let me just say that this match should be at the top, not anywhere near the bottom. This is the true main event right here. Two years ago these two were the great white hope for many of you, and now I see NO one excited for this. Come on people. That match 2 years ago you all thought was a thing of beauty and that these guys would do great things, so why aren’t you equally excited this time around? I said their 2011 PPV match was horrible AND that these guys were horrible, and that a push for either of them would never work, because they suck… and a bunch of you yelled at me. Now it’s 2 years later, and now neither of these guys caught on, just like I said would happen, and everyone is making excuses, also just like I said would happen. “Oh, Shaemus’ character has been watered down.” What? Shaemus is doing the EXACT same thing he was doing when you all were excited. NO one has said I was right. So you can all imagine how excited I am for this. This is much more than a wrestling match. It’s about right vs. wrong. It’s about oppression vs. freedom. It’s about tyranny vs. democracy. Most importantly, it’s about me being right. I’m not even kidding. If I watch any part of the PPV, it’ll be this match. Also, the ONLY way to improve upon the match from 2 years ago would have been to make it THIS kind of match. A STRAP match. Are they serious? ARE THEY FUCKING SERIOUS. These two have enough trouble working a regular match, so how did these poor guys get saddled with THIS gimmick? Has ANYONE enjoyed a strap match, ever? Sanders and Leonard told me on Classy Ring Attire that the buildup consisted of Henry’s doctor advising him against wrestling any actual matches wherever possible, so he’s been doing random feats of strength… that Shaemus will then interrupt. That’s the match. If the buildup for this match was HOW in the world they got THIS stipulation for the match, I’d have watched every second. Who did they piss off? When 2 guys are slow and easily winded, you want them to not be able to distance themselves? Jesus, why not just put them in a ladder match or Ultimate X or that TNA Birdcage thing?
Winner: Shaemus, before he goes on to main-event by SummerSlam, or WrestleMania at the latest…
KON: Fella’s done nothing but rain on Henry’s parade, so it’d be nice if the face came out on top. Wait, Fella’s the face? For real? What about all those cheap shots? What about cheating during the tug of war? What about- ah, fuck it.
Winner: Fella
Rhett Davis: Yeesh. Sheamus has gone the wrong way about being entertaining. He should’ve followed the CM Punk trail instead of the John Cena trail. And this entire feud has solely been about how much of dick Sheamus can be. He takes a ton of cheap shots on Henry, he takes every advantage he can. Seriously what’s the point? Anyways, Mark Henry wins because Strap Matches are used to give heels cheap wins. Then again… if Sheamus won very cheaply, it’d give Henry a reason to whine until he got a rematch… ugh… so the Red Headed Step-Face-of-the-Company.
Winner: That Red Headed Fella
Mike Gojira: Anyone give a shit? Honestly? I’m going to make a bold prediction here.
Winner: Mark Henry
Justin C: I actually had some interest in this match, and then they added a terrible gimmick to it. A Strap Match is just about the worst match you can think of. It is very slow moving and doesn’t hold much interest. I’ve still been a fan of Mark Henry’s work for the last couple years. He’s effective in his role and doesn’t lose a lot of heat even if he loses. And I think he is a decent worker for his size. Sheamus, on the other hand, has gotten worse ever since winning the World Title at Wrestlemania 29. He’s gone from an ass kicker to a joke maker. WWE officials may still see him as a top star down the line, but he is in dangerous territory right now. If it gets any worse, he may get into John Cena like levels. He needs to go back to his roots. I’m picking Sheamus to win here and start building back up to a World Title program.
Winner: Sheamus
CB: WWE has booked this so poorly that Mark Henry is the guy that has been doing face-like things like breaking fake world records and getting cheap-shotted by Sheamus during Arm Wrestling contests. Therefore, I hope Mark Henry DOES WHAT HE DOES to Sheamus, whatever that is. Besides, you can’t have a pale white Irishman whipping Henry with a strap, right? That would make Michael Hayes mark out way too much.
Winner: Mark Henry
People Power: In yet another close contest, Sheamus picks up the ‘People Power’s’ pick with 52% of the total vote.
The Tally: Sheamus – 6
Mark Henry – 2
Extreme Rules Match
The Big Show vs. Randy Orton
Steven Gepp: I like Big Show. I am bored completely stupid by Randy Orton. He has been phoning everything in as of late, even as he runs roughshod over the midcard. I don’t care about this match unfortunately.
Winner: Randy
BD: If I spent my entire life searching, I don’t think I could find anyone to care about this match.
Winner: Randy Orton
KON: I predict lots of rest holds and other pointless bullshit from Orton. If they cut his entrance, maybe half of these other matches will stay on the card.
Winner: Big Show
Rhett Davis: Ugh… this and the previous match just are not interesting at all… I’ll say that Big Show wins just because.
Winner: Big Show
Mike Gojira: Ugh. These two will probably just go through the motions. There’s no drive or desire on either guy’s part.
Winner: Randy Orton
Justin C: This is an Extreme Rules match, but I just don’t care. Randy Orton’s character is very stale and in desperate need of a heel turn. And I really haven’t cared about Big Show for the last few years. I’ll go with Big Show after a KO Punch into a chair, knocking out Orton.
Winner: Big Show
CB: Can JBL stop saying that “if you built a wrestler from scratch he’d look like Randy Orton” already? Sorry, just had to vent about that. Meanwhile…
Winner: Big Show as Randy Orton loses re: the Curse of Wrestling in your Hometown
People Power: In a large lead, Randy Orton receives the ‘People Power’s’ pick with 71% of the total vote.
The Tally: Randy Orton – 4
Big Show – 4
#1 Contender’s I Quit Match for World Heavyweight Championship
Alberto del Rio vs. Jack Swagger
Steven Gepp: Now I had high hopes for the last match between these two and was underwhelmed. I still think they have the ability to hit one out of the park, but with the presence of Zeb and Ricardo I think story will overwhelm action. I also expect Big E to make his presence felt, and maybe even Ziggler, leading to the 3-way next month anyway.
Winner: Double DQ
BD: So, this is taking place because Ziggler is injured? People seem to have given up on Del Rio, which makes me sad because I really like the dude. And Swagger is terrible, the one thing he’s been successful at over the years is proving how worthless he is. Del Rio could pull a good match out of him though, if the dude can work with Shaemus he can work with anyone. And this is actually better than having Ziggler, because it will hopefully lead to Del Rio and Ziggler one-on-one somewhere down the line, which is much better than having Jack Swagger there to gum up the works.
Winner: Alberto Del Rio
KON: After this, Swagger will team with Iron Sheik. Vince loves himself an odd couple.
Winner: Alberto Del Rio
Rhett Davis: I’m pretty exhausted with both of these two characters. Not their in-ring matches, just their personas. So this is pretty dull. I’ll say that Alberto del Rio will win so we can have the one on one rematch at Payback. So Alberto can get his… okay too much.
Winner: Albert of the River
Mike Gojira: What was once a promising title match is now a throw-away “I Quit” match, which all but makes the outcome rather obvious: Dolph Ziggler is a heel; therefore del Rio will become number one contender. Faces don’t say “I Quit” unless you’re tricked into it like Mick Foley.
Winner: Alberto del Rio
Justin C: There is potential for this match to be good, the problem is that no one really cares about the wrestlers involved. Swagger has fallen flat the last couple of months. His character hasn’t gotten over like the WWE would have liked. Part of it is probably because they don’t want to push him too hard after his DUI arrest. Alberto del Rio, meanwhile, hasn’t gotten over the way that the WWE has liked. Hell, I think if it wasn’t for Ricardo, he would have absolutely no heat whatsoever. Similar to Sheamus, if the WWE wants him to be their top Mexican star, they need to act quick. With Dolph Ziggler being World Champion, you would’ve assumed Alberto del Rio would win. When it was made an “I Quit” Match, it guaranteed Del Rio would win. Faces don’t lose these matches. Barring a double turn that Matt Harrak suggested, which could work, Del Rio wins.
Winner: Alberto del Rio
CB: Part of me wants there to be some wonky finish where Swagger and Del Rio both don’t win in exchange for a fresher matchup for Ziggler once he comes back. Could they throw in Big E Langston, perhaps, and make this a Triple Threat I Quit Match?
Winner: No Contest due to shenanigans
People Power: With a larger lead, Alberto del Rio wins the ‘People Power’s’ pick with 79% of the total vote.
The Tally: Alberto del Rio – 6
Double DQ – 1
No Contest – 1
Steel Cage Rubber Match
Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar
Steven Gepp: Because the first two were such classics that we needed a third one. This will be the end of it, right? Right? No. See, I remember the classic series between HHH and Scott Steiner, and this one feels like HHH is telling himself that what was lacking in those amazing bouts was more of them! [/sarcasm mode… normally I wouldn’t do that, but some in the comments section seem to not have a sarcasm detector]. Anyway, I think the result will lead to another match.
Winner: No contest due to outside interference (CM Punk, Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels, the entire defensive line from the Dallas Cowboys and North Korea’s standing army will probably all somehow get involved)
BD: The first match they did had some good buildup, but the match was terrible. The second match they did had some terrible buildup, and the match was even worse. The third match seems to be an odd de-escalation from a blood feud with careers on the line and wife insults, to messing up someone’s office even though there’s no way that Triple H doesn’t have people to fix that for him. I’m not a guy who often thinks that losses will really hurt a guy if he’s worth anything to begin with, but with the year Brock has had… yikes. I like Brock and all, but wow. And if the last 9 months should prove anything to Triple H, it’s that no one really cares at this point whether he wrestles or not. No idea why they’re doing this again – the ONLY correct thing is for Triple H to lose, so I’m going with that, but I wouldn’t be surprised (although I would be amused) to see it go the other way.
Winner: Brock Lesnar
KON: PISS!
Fucking going over: HHH, because Brock is only there to make Vince think his circus is on the same level as UFC.
Winner: HHH
Rhett Davis: I’m just so tired of this feud and it helping with absolutely nothing! It’s time for Brock to fight some people that actually wrestle from week to week. Help elevate some talent why don’t you! Same goes for Triple H. Brock will win this to maintain his ferocity.
Winner: The Next Big Thing
Mike Gojira: Thank Cthulhu this is it for these two. It’s time for Triple H to put Brock over so “The Beast Incarnate” can get his heat back for his next feud. Having the match in a Steel Cage allows Lesnar to win without resorting to Pinfall or Submission.
Winner: Brock Lesnar
Justin C: Why are these two fighting again? Because Brock Lesnar ruined HHH’s office? Because their series is tied 1-1? Honestly, the first two matches have been below average, and I don’t expect this one to be any better. If the WWE is smart, they will have Brock Lesnar go over here. If Lesnar loses, who the hell does he move onto that would matter? Hunter winning makes no sense. My guess is that Brock Lesnar wins here after pinning HHH. After the match, HHH gets beatdown by The Shield, and we end up getting HHH/Undertaker/??? vs The Shield at SummerSlam. Meanwhile, Lesnar moves on to CM Punk after Heyman has Lesnar take out Punk at Payback for leaving Heyman high and dry. And the best thing of all? We hopefully never see HHH and Brock Lesnar in the ring together ever again.
Winner: Brock Lesnar
CB: This feud is still going on? Honestly, some people think they’ve sold this one pretty well the past two weeks. I say this one could not be salvaged from being anything other than anti-climactic regardless of what they do to each other. As for the result, Brock HAS to win the rubber match, right? I hope so.
Winner: Brock Lesnar
People Power: With a big lead, Brock Lesnar wins the ‘People Power’s’ pick with 67% of the total vote.
The Tally: Brock Lesnar – 6
Triple H – 1
Draw – 1
WWE Championship Last Man Standing Match
John Cena (c) vs. Ryback
Steven Gepp: After watching Hulk Cena on Raw defeat the Shield single-handedly, it’s like 1996 WCW all over again. Look, he tends to bring the goods in PPV matches, but his character is boring me and it is annoying me and the way his character acts is actually driving me further away from the product. People say Ryback is Goldberg v2.0. Sorry, I disagree. Watch Goldberg’s Halloween Havoc match against DDP in 1997 and tell me Ryback could ever be that agile and perform that well. Ryback is a Goldberg-wanna-be. The match could well end up being a good one, but I am going to have to overcome a lot of personal prejudice to probably enjoy it. And to all those out there who say “Why don’t you have people who like wrestling on this site”, I don’t care what you think. I like wrestling and have done so for more than three decades. I don’t have to like everything. If I did I’d be a fan-boy and who wants to read gushing commentary about a product that is lame? Sorry. [/rant]
Winner: (as if there’s any doubt) John Hogan
BD: This show is confused. It was confused enough already. Ryback has lost most of this year, and now he gets a title shot, then turns evil even though most people already hate Cena. I am fairly certain this will suck, aside of course from the element where the crowd will be screaming out for Cena’s blood and will love everything Ryback does, even though Ryback sucks and he’s supposed to be the heel. Last Man Standing matches tend to favor Cena, and the only way he’s losing is by shenannigans, and who cares then anyway. I don’t care for either guy and I don’t care who wins, but I don’t see Cena having beaten Rock for the belt just to lose it to this inbred doorknob.
Winner (and still WWE Champion): John Cena
KON: Cena doesn’t really have anyone else to quarrel with after this, so I imagine his dodgy heel will play some sort of role in the match.
Winner and new WWE Champion: The Ryback (to extend the feud)
Rhett Davis: I’m not sure if Ryback is ready for a title run. Plus it would be kind of ridiculous for John Cena to lose his belt only a month after spending a year gaining redemption. John Cena wins it after totally burying Ryback and no selling his Shell Shocked.
Winner (and STILL WWE Champion): John Friggin’ Cena
Mike Gojira: Last Man Standing match? More like “Last Person to Stay Awake” match. The build has been HORRIBLE, the heel turn was unnecessary, and a once-promising feud was ruined by Ryback’s repeated jobbing over the past few months. Since we’re slated to continue this one after Extreme Rules, I’m gonna call for a controversial ending; say, double KO.
Winner: Nobody, but John Cena remains WWE Champion (and that means if Cena retains, it still counts as a winning pick for me, Rhett!)
Justin C: The WWE got this one right. I never want to see a one-on-one regular singles match between John Cena and Ryback. That match would be absolutely dreadful. Ryback can’t work in the ring and Cena is only as good as his opponent. The Last Man Standing gimmick allows these guys to move around the ring and use various weapons as distractions. It also gives them time to catch their breath during the long ten counts. So it was a smart move by the WWE. We are supposed to believe that John Cena’s bad heel injury is going to limit his chances here. But we all know that isn’t happening. Super Cena doesn’t go down without a fight. The only way he is losing here is if Ryback does what Big Show did in Cena’s LMS Match with Edge and throw him through an 8,000 WATT SURGE LIGHT!!!! Plus, I don’t think the WWE trusts Ryback enough to put the most important title in the company on him. John Cena retains after putting Ryback through the announce table with the AA. If he wins via duct tape, get ready for my Twitter rant.
Winner: John Cena
CB: There is NO WAY Ryback wins this match. I’m sure they do something stupid like Cena wins, then Ryback destroys him afterwards to get his heat back. For me, the ONLY thing that can save this one is if CM Punk comes back 8 nights earlier than anticipated and does something like take out Ryback backstage early on in the night, then go to the ring and beat Cena for the title. Afterwards, he cuts a promo about how he couldn’t sit back and watch Cena and Ryback ruin everything he worked to build over 434 days, and now he wants the title for 434 more. I also hope said promo leans to Punk turning face again, because honestly Cena is the biggest heel the company’s ever had these days, he’s just disguised as their biggest face as a marketing ploy. As for what will ACTUALLY happen, I’ll go with the former.
Winner: John Cena, then Ryback gets his heat back afterwards
People Power: Also with a large majority, John Cena wins the ‘People Power’s’ vote with 79% of the total vote.
The Tally: John Cena – 7
Ryback – 1
Well this concludes the Extreme Rules 2013 Rasslin’ Roundtable. Be sure to check out Inside Pulse’s Live Coverage of Extreme Rules tomorrow! Thanks for reading.
