Yes, RAW was taped last week. But I’m here to give you the live results! Remember, every time you read the spoilers instead of my live report, a little kitten dies.
Did Triple H Take Over Vince’s Mind?
After a video recapping last week, Vince McMahon came out with Brad Maddox. Vince said they were going to have some fun tonight. He handed the mic to Brad Maddox. He apologized for his decision to let John Cena pick his opponent at SummerSlam. Vince said last week, Brad Maddox called Daniel Bryan a troll, and that he was under sized and didn’t have the aura to be a WWE Champion. Vince asked Maddox how he really felt about Daniel Bryan. Daniel Bryan came out.
Bryan said that while those words did come out of the mouth of Brad Maddox, he believes they were dictated by Vince. Vince said interrupting him shows a lack of respect. Bryan said that respect was a two way street. He said that despite years of working for his company, Vince never has shown him respect. Vince asked if Bryan respected Cena, which he said he did. Vince said Cena didn’t mean anything he said when he gave him all those compliments on why he picked Bryan, and asked if Bryan was a fool. Vince said Bryan couldn’t beat John Cena, and he couldn’t beat Kane tonight. Vince said it was because Bryan doesn’t have any ruthless aggression. Vince said it would be the biggest embarrassment possible for the WWE if John Cena lost the WWE Title to Bryan. He said his dream scenario is that when they are in the ring at SummerSlam, both Cena and Bryan spontaneously combust. Bryan said if Cena is lying, he has hell to pay. Bryan said Vince is always honest with him, but in Vince’s own words, it doesn’t matter what he thinks. It matters what the WWE Universe thinks. Bryan asked them if they want a new WWE Champion. They chanted YES as the segment came to an end.
Segment Analysis: I liked that exchange between Vince and Bryan. Anytime someone gets a long segment with Vince in the ring, it has to be good for them. Bryan didn’t take any of Vince’s insults and he didn’t look out of place or nervous with Vince in the ring. I don’t know where this whole Vince burying Bryan is going. Does Vince pick someone to take out Bryan as his guy? Good start to RAW. Survey Says: 3/5
The Usos Teaming With Their Dad? Oh Wait, It’s Just Mark Henry
The Shield vs Mark Henry and The Usos. Henry threw Ambrose around the ring early. Ambrose tagged in Rollins, who was tossed around the ring as well. Roman Reigns eventually came in. Henry slammed Reigns into the turnbuckle then tagged in Jey Uso. Jey landed some kicks then tagged in Jimmy. Reigns took out Jimmy and The Shield gained the upper hand. Jimmy took out Ambrose with a clothesline and he tagged in Jey. Jey hit some clotheslines then tagged in Henry. Henry missed a splash, but he blocked a double team attempt and clotheslined Rollins and Ambrose over the top. He then tossed Reigns to the outside, and the Usos hit dives to the outside.
Back from break, The Shield had control. Reigns applied an armbar on Jey. Reigns tagged in Ambrose who also went to an armbar. Jey escaped. Ambrose charged at Jey but he moved and Ambrose went into the ringpost. Ambrose tagged in Rollins, who stopped the tag from being made and knocked Jimmy off the apron. Jey backdropped Rollins and tagged in Henry. Henry cleaared out the ring, but Reigns hit a Spear on Henry. Reigns was taken out on the outside. Jimmy Uso hit a dive off the top, then a Samoan Drop on Ambrose. He went for a splash off the top, but Ambrose got his knees up. Ambrose hit his finisher for the win. After the match, Mark Henry cleared the ring of The Shield.
Match Analysis: I’ve seen better Shield matches but this one wasn’t bad. I’m surprised they did this on RAW. Maybe at SummerSlam they put all of the Titles on the line. The Usos and The Shield do have good chemistry in the ring though. Survey Says: 2.5/5
They showed Ryback bullying someone at catering earlier. He put the poor guy through a table.
A Wyatt Video aired. Kane came into Brad Maddox’s office after and said he wanted the Wyatts.
Rob Van Dam vs Fandango. RVD caught Fandango with a kick to the head, then a moonsault off the apron. Fandango hit RVD in the head while getting back up the apron. RVD went for a spinning heel kick but missed, and Fandango hit a kick of his own. RVD started a comeback with some kicks of his own, then Rolling Thunder. RVD springboarded Fandango away, then hit a kick to the face. Fandango bailed to the outside. RVD wanted to hit a dive, but Summer Rae got in the way. Fandango bailed and was counted out. After word, Fandango pronounced his name.
Match Analysis: Match was too short. These are two guys who currently have no direction whatsoever. Survey Says: 2/5
Yes AJ, We Do Like To Watch You
A.J. complained to Big E about having to fight Kaitlyn again, and always getting speared, and him just watching. AJ says he does that because he must like what she does in the ring. She skipped away.
And now it’s Kaitlyn vs AJ. AJ gained the upper hand with some slaps and applied an armbar. Kaitlyn got to the ropes. AJ kicked Kaitlyn a couple of times, but missed a splash attempt. Kaitlyn tried a roll up but AJ escaped and hit a knee to the face. Kaitlyn escaped a chinlock and caught AJ with an elbow. Kaitlyn hit a clothesline and went for a Spear, but AJ caught her with a knee. AJ hit a drop armbreaker for two. AJ went for a clothesline but Kaitlyn caught her with a Spear for the win.
Match Analysis: There is almost no one else to throw in there with AJ, so might as well keep Kaitlyn. Wasn’t the best match these two have had, by a longshot. Survey Says: 2/5
Ex’s Be Crazy
AJ started throwing a fit, but Dolph Ziggler came out. He said she could cry on Big E’s shoulders later, and Big E could cry on AJ’s later because he wants a match with him right now. Big E accepted.
The match started back from break. Big E caught Dolph with a power takedown. Big E hit a powerslam for two. Big E applied a bearhug. Big E transitioned into a chinlock. Big E speared Dolph in the corner and hit a couple of shoulders in the corner, but Dolph ducked out of the way of one and Big E went into the ringpost. Dolph landed some punches then a dropkick. Big E charged at Dolph but he moved again and went over the top. A.J. jumped on Dolph in the ring and scratched and clawed at Dolph, causing a DQ. AJ screamed and complained after the match. The distraction allowed Dolph to sneak in and hit a ZigZag on Big E.
Match Analysis: Another short match. I’m assuming they will still have one at SummerSlam, hence the non-clean finish. AJ once again played the crazy card well. Survey Says: 2/5
Backstage Daniel Bryan asked John Cena if what Vince said was true. Cena asked if he was calling him a liar, then walked off.
Being World Champ=Being The New IC Champ
Christian vs Alberto del Rio. Both men locked up and Del Rio applied a headlock takedown. Christian escaped and hit a right hand then a headlock takedown of his own. Del Rio broke the hold in the corner, but then landed multiple kicks on Christian. Christian went for his over the top rope punch but Del Rio bailed. Del Rio caught Christian with a kick but missed another and Christian sent him to the outside. Del Rio moved out of the way of a baseball slide, then tossed Christian into the steps and dropkicked him into them heading into commercial.
Del Rio still had control back from break. Del Rio worked over Christian’s arm with some kicks. Del Rio put Christian on the top but Christian elbowed him off, then hit a tornado DDT for two. Christian started a comeback and hit a missile drop kick and a roll up for two. Del Rio jumped right up with a clothesline and some headbutts. Del Rio dumped Christian over the top but he hung on the apron and hit a kick to the head. But Del Rio immediately caught Christian with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Del Rio missed a back dive off the top. Del Rio bailed on a Spear attempt. Christian chased him outside but Del Rio caught him with a kick to the head for a two count. Del Rio missed an enziguri kick. Christian went for the Killswitch but Del Rio countered into a cross ambreaker, which Christian countered into a roll up for the win.
Match Analysis: Even with this being a taped show, there were some clear botches that they tried to edit out early on. The match was a bit slow paced for my liking. These two are definitely capable of better. Survey Says: 2.5/5
Cody Rhodes vs Wade Barrett. Wade clotheslined Cody over the top early, then slammed his head into the barricade. Wade hit a slingshot backdrop on Cody for two. Cody caught Barrett with a couple elbows in the corner then a moonsault dive off the top. Cody hit a kick to the gut then a knee to the face for two. Wade ducked a Disaster Kick then caught Cody with a kick to the gut. Wade went for a pump handle slam, but Cody reversed it into Cross Rhodes for the win.
Damien Sandow came out after the match. He said he filed a complaint to WWE management about Cody tossing his Money in the Bank briefcase in the Gulf of Mexico. Sandow said he comes from a family of scholars, and Cody comes from a family of clowns. Sandow said carnies are beneath him and left.
Match Analysis: At least this mid-card feud has some legs to it. Even if you didn’t know, you could tell this show was taped with the short matches and barely any storyline advancement so far tonight. Survey Says: 2/5
Kane is No Antonio Cesaro
Daniel Bryan vs Kane. Bryan hit a dropkick then landed some kicks, but Kane hit a hip toss. Bryan applied a half crab which Kane powered out of. Bryan ducked a clothesline but Kane caught him with a boot to the face. Kane hit a couple of chops then a suplex for two. Bryan fought out of a chinlock and hit some punches, but Bryan jumped right into Kane’s arms. Kane hit a bodyslam them a sit down dropkick for two. Bryan came back with some kicks and a clothesline. Bryan countered a chokeslam attempt and dumped Kane to the outside. Bryan then hit a knee off the apron into commercial.
Back from break Kane it a clothesline in the corner. Bryan then hit a drop toe hold on Kane into the corner. Bryan hit a missile dropkick off the top then a dropkick in the corner, and two more after. Bryan went to the top again but Kane caught him with an upper cut. Kane hit a side slam for two. Kane hit his clothesline off the top. He went for a chokeslam but Bryan tried countering into the Yes Lock, but Kane powered out. Bryan landed some kicks but Kane caught him on one. Kane went for a chokeslam but Bryan countered with a roll up for the win.
After the match, Kane hit a chokeslam on Bryan. The Wyatt Family came out. He went after Bray but Harper and Rowan stopped him. They took Kane out in the ring. Bray came in and hit his finisher. He said he heard Kane calls himself the Devil’s Favorite Demon. Bray told him to be careful who he says those things around, because you never know who is listening.
Segment Analysis: Obviously after Bryan/Cesaro last week, this was a bit of a step down. Kane is obviously more focused on the Wyatt Family now. It was good to see them back on TV this week. Match again could have been a little better. Just the basic stuff. Survey Says: 2.5/5
Brie Bella defeated Natlaya with a roll up after Nikki distracted Natlaya on stage with a duck kazoo.
How Is One More Perfect Than Perfect?
Curtis Axel came out to fight R-Truth. Paul Heyman said he is the most wanted agent in all of wrestling. He said Lesnar will end the career of Punk at SummerSlam. He then said it was great being a Paul Heyman, just like his client Curtis Axel. Axel said he was more perfect than perfect. Truth got some offense in early and hit a spinning heel kick. Axel caught Truth in the back of the head with a punch and landed some kicks. Truth tried fighting back but Axel caught him with a dropkick then a neckbreaker. CM Punk came out and he took out Axel and went after Paul Heyman. Axel got back up and him and Punk brawled, allowing Heyman to escape.
Segment Analysis: With no Lesnar, and again with the show being taped, there wasn’t much to build on here. You know Punk won’t be getting his hands on Heyman until SummerSlam. Look for Punk to fight Axel next week to fill a show until SummerSlam. Survey Says: 2.5/5
Triple H talked to Vince backstage. Vince said he wants someone to beat John Cena, just not Daniel Bryan. He wants someone like HHH, just a little younger. Stephanie came in and suggested a corporate makeover for Bryan. HHH said it’s worth a shot. *bangs head*
These Guys Main Evented A PPV?
Main Event time. Ryback caught a charging Cena with a kick to the gut. Cena started fighting back and clotheslined Ryback over the top. Cena threw Ryback into the barricade and got a table from under the ring. But Ryback surprised Cena from behind and threw him into the ringpost. Ryback charged at Cena with a table but he moved and the table broke on the ringpost.
Back from break Ryback hit a belly-to-belly on Cena. Cena got out of a powerbomb attempt on the outside, but Ryback tossed Cena into the steps. Ryback put the steps in the ring, but Cena recovered and backed Ryback into the barricade and ring apron. Cena set a table up on the apron and one of the steps left outside. Ryback blocked a suplex attempt and hit one of his own. Ryback tossed Cena back in the ring, but he took his time and allowed Cena to lock in the STF. Ryback broke the hold by choking Cena with the ropes. Cena went to throw a table on Ryback but he went under the ring. Cena went to look for him, but Ryback caught him with a spear on the outside. Ryback then hit Cena with the steps. Ryback also set up a table in between some steps and the apron. Both men blocked attempts to be put through tables. Ryback went for a powerslam but Cena went over the table. Both men grabbed a set up steps and threw it at the other. Cena backdropped Cena on the steps and hit the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena went for a table but Ryback recovered and hit a jawbreaker. Ryback hit the Meathook clothesline. He went for another, but Cena moved and hit the AA on Ryback, putting him through the table set up in the corner.
After the match, Daniel Bryan came out and handed Cena the WWE Title. He pulled it back and said it was going to be his. Cena grabbed it away and said he had a long way to go as they stared down to end the show.
Match Analysis: Slow. Plodding. Whatever you want to use to describe that match. A boring end to a boring show. Survey Says: 1.5/5
I kept a lot of my analysis short, but that is because there wasn’t much to write about here. No match went very long or was particularly good. There was barely any storyline advancement on the show. Getting the McMahons involved in the Bryan/Cena story may end up being just as bad as if the Bellas had gotten involved. CM Punk was on the show for all of three minutes. There just wasn’t a lot to like about this show. Bryan was entertaining in the opener and held his own against Vince in the opening promo segment. I’m giving the show a 2 overall. Not a lot of good wrestling, short matches, and barely if any storyline advancement.
Until Next Time,
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Tags: alberto del rio, christian, cm punk, Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, john cena, kane, Raw, ryback, sheamus, Summerslam, The Wyatt Family, WWE