Monday Morning Critic – 2013’s Seminally Bad Idea: The Entourage Movie – Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Awesomeness and Predator on DVD Reviewed

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You know what kind of disappointed me this past week? The fact that the Entourage film is a go, now, and sometime in either 2014 or 2015 we’ll be seeing more adventures of movie star Vinnie Chase (Adrian Grenier), his agent Ari (Jeremy Piven) and Vinnie’s hangers-on (Kevin Dillon, Kevin Connolly and Jerry Ferrara). After the show concluded in such unspectacular fashion the idea of a movie has been kicked around by all involved. It worked with Sex and the City, twice even, and there’s something to be said about the limits of a 30 minute time slot.

Getting two hours to tell a story in one fell swoop, as opposed to breaking it up over two to three hours in 12 episodes, can be a blessing or a curse. And most times it’s a curse.

I enjoyed Entourage immensely, despite it being a six season show that ran for two more seasons that it should, but we have to be honest. It didn’t end on the highest of notes, to be frank. We got the happy ending but everything about the series had essentially been resolved. Vince met the love of his life and was getting married, Ari gave up his agency to be with his family, E was about to become a father and every other major storyline had been resolved.

There was the after credits scene, of course, with Ari being offered the chance to run his own studio, but everything else of note was wrapped up. The show ended, albeit in rushed fashion, but it ended in a way that didn’t warrant any more stories to be told. We got the requisite happy ending for everyone involved and they flew off into the sunset. It’s not like our last image of Vinny Chase was as a lumberjack; he walked off into the sunset with the girl and his buddies.

I just keeping one thing: What else is there to say?

I keep thinking that any attempt to try and continue the tale is just going to be awful in the same way the Sex and the City films were. That series wrapped up in a similar manner, with everyone going into the sunset, and came back for no real reason other than to try and make money. And that’s what bothers me most about the Entourage film: there’s no new story to tell.

It’s why it might be 2013’s worst idea.

Stuff for General George S. Pimpage, Esq

From elsewhere in the Inside Pulse Network:

On Inside Fights we covered Bellator 106 all weekend. So give us some clickage if you want.

Travis Leamons had thoughts on Ender’s Game

And then Tommy Toe Hold had some awesomeness for Halloween

And now on MMC … we DANCE!

If you want to pimp anything email it to me with a good reason why. It helps to bribe me with stuff, just saying ….

A Movie A Week – The Challenge

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This Week’s DVD – Predator

So I was actually going to do Olympus Has Fallen but something awesome happened. Arnold Schwarzenegger did something on Reddit where he would do the lines from his films if you asked him to. I asked for my favorite line from this film and he did it.

Thus this week’s film is Predator, one of my favorite films of all time.

It’s a simple film. Arnold Schwarzenegger and a team of yolked up badasses are dropped into the middle of the jungle on a rescue operation. They’re the best special operations team in the service and are called on to rescue a Cabinet Member on the wrong side of the border. Bad people have them and it’s up to Arnold and his team of improbably muscular commandos to rescue them.

All the while something is hunting them … and it’s not human.

I reviewed this on Blu-Ray three years ago (which I thought was six months ago … thus time flying and whatnot) and it’s a film that definitely deserves another look. Besides … it’s Predator. It’s a film that if you haven’t seen you could probably figure out what happens in it based purely on people quoting it. It’s like Napoleon Dynamite in that regard; you can kind of figure out both films by just listening to people quote it for like an hour or so.

I’ve always thought of Predator as a modern samurai film. In any other movie it’d be a bunch of guys not knowing what to do, et al, when it comes to this threat. Any other film and it’s a horror film, with the Predator as a slasher villain killing teenagers/villagers/whatever. He messed with a bunch of badasses, though. How do they deal with it?

It’s a great scene set up. Billy admits he’s scared when Anna talks about how the jungle just came alive and killed Hawkins. Poncho is incredulous; Billy can’t be scared. No man scares. Billy tells him “There’s something out there waiting for us, and it ain’t no man. We’re all gonna die.” Anna mentions how they must’ve wounded it, as she saw its blood.

“If it bleeds we can kill it.”

There isn’t freaking out. There isn’t a plan. It’s a base instinct. This thing has bled … and thus not invulnerable. Thus if they’re going to do anything … they’re going to kill this monster once and for all. It oozes testosterone, of course, and is one of the best lines of the decade. But it goes to something bigger, I’ve always thought.

They may be dead men walking … but they’ll be damned if this thing will walk away from a fight alive as well.

It’s why the second half of the film is such a turn in the right direction for the film. After the big action sequence that marks the end of the first act we’re given such a different change in tone and direction that a lot of films would sink. Predator soars.

Highest recommendation ever.

What Looks Good This Weekend, and I Don’t Mean the $2 Pints of Bass Ale and community college co-eds with low standards at the Alumni Club

Thor: The Dark World – Hammer time?

See It – Hammer time!

Scott “Kubryk” Sawitz brings his trademarked irreverence and offensive hilarity to Twitter in 140 characters or less. Follow him @ScottSawitz .

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