Random Thoughts: Total Divas – Episode 9

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{Ed. Note: If you missed my post in my “Raw Review”, I can no longer budget the time to complete a “10 Thoughts” style of column to HTC or Inside Pulse. Instead I’ll be reverting back to my old “Quick Hits” style of format, just rebranded as “Random Thoughts” since I’ll likely rant about one thing or another. I hope you enjoy these article as much as the “10 Thoughts” and any feedback would be much appreciated. – MJH}

SEASON RECAP: SummerSlam is nye and the Boyfriend Bellas (John Cena & Daniel Bryan) are facing off in the main event for the WWE Championship; Eva Marie is intent on being WWE’s resident bitch; JoJo is still around… I think; and Nattie is embarrassed on WWE TV again. Welcome back to WWE Total Divas!

– I forgot how much I hate the Funkadactlys. Thanks E! Network.

– Eva Marie being so excited for a Maxim shoot is adorable. Let’s see the sales numbers… oh wait, the print industry is dying.

– HA! So Eva’s big signing was at the merch booth outside the arena before the show’s taping? Yea, people were lined up to see you. Or maybe they thought Maria Kanellis had made a return.

– First farting and now peeing. The WWE really does hate the Harts.

– I remember John telling that story in one of those wrestling road stories books. Hey, wrestling is a damn physical, contact sport. If you’re not feeling well and get it in the stomach, you’re going to sh*t. It’s the human digestive system.

– You don’t think it’s important if John Cena just bails on a promotion appearance with no explanation?

– I’m excited for this Flintstones movie now, especially since Daniel Bryan looks like he could be in a live action version.

– “Well, when John became her boyfriend, he was already in the main event.” – Burn, Daniel Bryan. Burn.

– It’s a good thing these shows air so far after they tape them. Cena revealed the match finish to Nikki hours before the match. Just imagine if this was a few years ago and something like that was on WWE TV.

– Leave it to the Bellas to verbalize the homoeroticism in pro-wrestling.

– No Randy Orton cash-in? Well I guess they do need to pad out more episodes.

– Seems like there’s A LOT more drama this season (as if there wasn’t enough last season) but hey, that’s what people want to see. More segments in this episode revolving around the wrestling world, which I like to see but so did the first episode of the series. Stay tuned for the cat fights and scripted bitchiness!

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