THE RAGER! Wrestlemania XXX And Ultimate Warrior

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First off, I do apologize for not having a 10 Thoughts column go up yesterday. I’m going out of town today and the only time Joel and myself could record this week’s Classy Ring Attire (follow us on twitter @CRAttire) before then was right after Raw. I promise to return next week with your regularly scheduled Raw 10 Thoughts

Wrestlemania XXX

Kick-off Match: Usos vs Real Americans vs Ryback & Curtis Axel vs Los Matadores
First off, I was relieved this was turned into an elimination tag match instead of making it one fall because that would as hectic and pointless as a 14 person single fall match instead of a battle royal…you know, just as an example. However, the match seems kind of secondary when you consider Real Americans broke up and the fans getting so behind Cesaro. Personally, I was convinced WWE threw those plans out of the window weeks ago after they seemingly gave up on the angle. I’m glad they didn’t.

Daniel Bryan vs HHH
That might have been my favorite HHH Wrestlemania entrance ever, firstly. Secondly, I’m sort of glad they didn’t go with a big elaborate entrance for Bryan (you know they were tempted to do so). The only real surprise here was that post-match beat-down was way shorter than I was expecting but then again, that chair shot onto the arm on the ring post pretty did the trick. Also, I haven’t realized how much I’ve missed having Stephanie ringside for HHH’s matches, she’s not quite the entertaining ringside heel manager that Paul Heyman is but then again, who is?

The Shield vs Citizen Kane & The Old Age Inlaws
So we made the mistake of watching on a PS3 and this was the first moment the Network decided to screw us in the mouth. The video cut out right when Shield’s music hit and by the time we were able to get it to work again, they were showing replays of the end of the match. I’ve since rewatched and even though I thought this match was a waste of a Shield appearance, I am glad Shield stayed together and even more glad to see that they’re also working out well as faces.

ARMBAR Match
So many Andre nods and the match itself was way better than what I was expecting. I now feel spoiled because we got an extra “Royal” spot out of Kofi, I’m still partial to the hand-walk spot but I really did like the stair one here. Obviously I’m a huge fan of Cesaro winning and I’m excited to see where all that leads because they guy definitely deserves to be pushed to the freaking moon. And the winning elimination, as if lifting Big Show wasn’t enough of a big moment but to do so with such seeming ease, all 15 people in my apartment were on their feet and the poor elderly couple downstairs were probably awakened. But who cares?

John Cena vs Bray Wyatt
So what if the Bray band played on a pre-recorded track, the moment was super cool (wasn’t really digging the voodoo lady but whatevs) and perfectly fitting Bray’s character and the tone of the moment. The match was a little slow at points but I’m okay with that because the story of the match was compelling enough to distract you from it. Clearly the best moment was the surprise spider that made me almost crap myself just as much as Cena appeared to have done. This match was an immediate rewatch for me because Bray does so many small things that sometimes it’s impossible to pick up, plus I was watching with some loud mofos and I couldn’t hear everything that was going on. I’m okay with Bray not winning because, as clearly told during the match, that wasn’t Bray’s objective. This match entertained the crap out of me.

Brock Lesnar vs Undertaker
And the other match that PS3/Network ruined for me. I got to see most of the match but it cut out about 15 minutes into it and came back as Brock was walking back up the ramp with his music playing and Taker obviously losing the match. That’s right, I was unable to see the moment the streak ended, a streak that has lasted since I was 3 years old. I sat there as a 26 year old feeling pretty damn cheated. I think I’m more angry about that than I am about the actual streak being broken because obviously, this was Undertaker’s decision and apparently wanted to do this a few years ago but Lesnar couldn’t get out of certain UFC obligations. A lot of people are feeling a good bit of hostility about the streak being broken but you had to have known this is what it was going to be like whenever it finally did happen, right? Would we have wanted Undertaker’s streak being broken at the end of a better match than this? Probably, yeah but nobody could’ve predicted Undertaker was going to get badly injured a few seconds into the match. It took me awhile to gather how I feel about this whole thing and I’m still working on it but at least I’m finally able to acknowledge that most of my aggression is due to the Network issues. For the record, I’ve yet to make myself go back and finally watch the end of the match.

14-Diva “Invitational”
Meh. It wasn’t terrible, just a lot of damn tassels all over the place. Glad AJ won but it would’ve been so much better if Cameron hadn’t botched the tap. AJ literally making Cameron tap out without the ref noticing she was moving her hand was such a great heel move. Color me impressed.

Daniel Bryan vs Batista vs Randy Orton
Well done, gents. Well done all around. The match was a good balance all of 3 guys that you didn’t notice much when one was taking a breather. That table spot looked brutal for both DB and Orton and whoever idea it was to give DB the Mick Foley “comeback from the stretcher” spot deserves a cold beverage of his or her’s choosing. THAT is how you build a popular face into a super hero. If this whole build was by design, so many kudos to everybody but if it wasn’t (it wasn’t) then congrats to WWE Creative on capitalizing on a happy mistake. All three wrestlers worked for me in their own way and the finale was one of the coolest wrestling moments I believe we’ve ever witnessed. If you told me that somebody would be able to bring the crowd back to life after they saw the streak end not even an hour earlier, I would’ve slapped the hell out of you and told you to go apologize to your parents because they didn’t raise you to be such a terrible person/liar.

In Disbelief
I woke up earlier than usual this morning with the intention of tacking on my Raw 10 Thoughts since I had missed it earlier in the week. However, the first thing I saw was the news that Ultimate Warrior has passed away and now I can’t really bring myself to talk about anything but that.
I wasn’t necessarily a huge Warrior fan, I was barely two years old when he defeated Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania VI but still, it’s impossible to be a wrestling fan today without seeing the impact of his iconic persona. Of course, it’s incredibly jarring for everyone because he passed less than 24 hours after we saw him on Raw. I do find solace in the fact that he was able to finally make peace with WWE after all these years and they were able to acknowledge his career and though many may debate whether or not he deserved it based on his ability or whatever, the penetrative cultural impact of his character and persona made him an undeniable candidate for the Hall of Fame. 54 is much too young. Same age as my father. May parts unknown welcome you with open arms, Warrior.

Don’t do anything I wouldn’t twice,
Chris

The Answer

Chris is a writer from Fayetteville, NC. He's the co-creator of Irrelevant But Awesome Productions which produces podcasts you all know and love like Classy Ring Attire, Trashy Ring Attire and The Disney Magic Podcast. You can keep up with everything on twitter by following @IBAStudios and @CWSanders39