Pulse Flashback 12/15/2004: Shawn Michaels, Smackdown Spoilers, Tons of Great Columns

Inside Pulse launched on August 9, 2004, and has covered the world of wrestling for over a decade. Every day, we take a look back at what was happening in the world of wrestling 10 years ago, as reported right here at Inside Pulse!

The Beatiful Thing presents: My Story Part III

As I sit down to write this column, I’m watching a fantastic custom DVD I got from Rob at Golden Boy. It’s got some of the greatest matches in AJPW history on it, including Misawa vs. Kawada from ’94, which is a legitimate contender for Best Match Ever. The matches on the disc represent, in my opinion and in many other fans’ opinions, much of what is great about being a wrestling fan. The matches are intense, the wrestlers are obviously dedicated to their craft, and the fans are completely into it. Perhaps more importantly, this is wrestling that doesn’t insult our intelligence in any way. It’s necessary for me to have this disc handy to wash away the bitter taste of what I’m about to write. For, you see, * dramatic pause * there was a period of time where I fell out of love with wrestling.

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A Wrestling Tale: Pop. Snap.

The following is a work of fiction. It is not based on any person living or dead.

Pop.

Jump off a ladder onto two masses of muscle and bone and then through the table.

Snap.

Don’t put up the hand to block the chair shot that will knock you over the top rope 8 feet to the floor.

Pop.

But whatever you do, don’t hurt yourself.

Snap.

Gotta love those two words. Pop. Snap. Like the cereal slogan. Scat words. Pop. Snap. Money money money. No more money. Two words. Two sounds. All gone. Career and future and you should of taken that job! You were offered a job and you didn’t take it. Oh well. Pop snap. Nothing to fall back on now. Maybe they’ll hold a charity show in your honor.

Pop.

DAREDEVIL! So daring. So devilish. What a guy what a guy what a guy. Pop. Snap. Ain’t nothing but a call to your woman now. “Baby, baby, we’ll get through this. Gotta spend all the money money money I made wrestling, acting, entertaining, play fighting, on my pop snap. No medical. No dental. Look at Benoit. You can get a job as a nurse and I’ll sign autographs on autodrive for fifty, forty, thirty, twenty, ten, five, hey you want an autograph no okay bucks a pop. We’ll beat this pop snap.” /p>
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Puroresu Pulse, issue 14

Section 1- Important results & Title matches

New Japan: A trio of notable shows. On Wednesday they had a series of matches with New Japan vs Chono’s stable as the theme. New Japan won overall, but Chono’s team took two of the biggest. Chono debuted his FTS finisher (STF/rear naked choke, first done by NOAH’s Shiga) to down Nishimura. Nakanishi took advantage of Tenzan’s war with Kawada a few days earlier to get an upset victory. Nagata debuted a variant of his Nagata Lock III to best gaijin powerhouse Scott Norton.

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HTM Comments on Foley vs. Flair

When will WWe get enough of Saggy Boy’s antics and 86 him? He is long overdue to be fired. His latest outrageous conduct against Mick Foley should be the last straw. I was in Singapore when I heard about the match of the decades that smartened the world up on the fakeness of wrestling. The one I am referring to is the Flair/Lawler match shown around the world. I heard this match was so horrible Dave Meltzer could not rate it as 1/2 a star. But matches do not make the man. Being a man makes the man.

I guess Flair is right. To be the man, you have to beat the man. Is that why he sucker punched Mick? The dirtiest player in the game was trying to be the man so he wanted to beat the man. I say Foley is the man because he found his niche outside the business. He does not have to have sh*tty matches such as Saggy Boy and Kink. Foley writes books. His books have outsold all the wrestling books written to this day. His books aren’t about his bragging rights of being the man or being the Kink

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More Detailed SD and Velocity Taping Results [Spoilers]

Orlando Jordan started the Smackdown night welcoming JBL to a ring trimmed with presidental red, white and blue while baloons and confetti rained from the rafters. JBL ripped on the Titans and would later talk about how he’s not going to Iraq for the WWE show. A half the size of JBL and scrawny looking, 2004 TNA Macho Manesque Kurt Angle hits the ring.

Angle channels Ron Howard from Happy Days, or little Opie Cunningham as Eddie Murphy used to call him, and offends JBL by calling him “Bucco.” I think it’s Angle’s right arm that has caught the Mr. Wonderful/Swamp Thing disease. Teddy Long gets the biggest pop of the night by making the match while Paul London wonders why he heard all those pins drop during his Velocity match. Angle is back to the comedy heel again.

A decent, better than average house show takes place between the opening promos and the main event. I have this theory that a comped crowd pops for everything and they did, save the early Velocity matches. The crowd was into everything on Smackdown and that made for a much better live show than I’m sure it will come off as on TV.

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Opinions, Etc. 12.15.04

I’m writing this on Wednesday afternoon, so it counts. Couldn’t get any prepwork done on Tuesday for it because the pills got to me again. Another twelve-hour nap, and it was up to go look at live cows at five in the f*cking morning. Well, it’s easy overtime, I must admit.

As per subjects today, I still haven’t watched Armageddon (too terrified to do so, but I’ll have to do it prior to doing the Short Form or I’ll be lost), so no comments on that. I’d only bore you with a dissertation on what lactic acid does to knives (nothing good, let me assure you), even though it’s a problem I have to deal with on a daily basis. I guess I’ll have to stick with what’s in the news. However, I don’t care about hostages on a bus in Athens (Who the hell hijacks a goddamn bus? Oh, yeah, Albanians. They’ve never been the sharpest knives in the drawer), so that’s out. And I’ve got to stop using parentheticals in the middle of a sentence. It tends to drive people crazy. Therefore, I’ll just knock out some quickies and go to sleep. More live cows to look at tomorrow morning.

On with the show…

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RAW News: Shawn Michaels To Return In MN?

The Target Center is advertising the following lineup for the 1/14/05 WWE Raw house show in Minneapolis, Minnesota, including the first public announcement that Shawn Michaels will return to action next month:

*Shawn Michaels vs. Ric Flair

*Randy Orton vs. Batista

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