It’s the first RAW of 2015, and it features the return of the Authority. So expect it to start the same way the early RAWs of 2014 did. Also advertised is an Ambulance Match between Dean Ambrose vs Bray Wyatt. What possible wacky way will Dean Ambrose find to lose this time? Follow along to find out.
Is This Really New?
RAW started with all of the roster in the ring. He said the Authority asked them to be there so they could talk to them face to face. Cena apologized and said that the health and well being of a friend is more important than the Authority being back in power. Cena talked about 2015 being a tough year but the Authority came out. Steph said they had a great new year because they knew they were coming back to do what they do best, entertain the WWE Universe. HHH said that less than two months ago they would be begging for them to come back, and made fun of all the crap that happened during their absence. HHH said that the WWE is back where it should be, and that’s because of one man, Seth Rollins. Rollins came out and said happy new year to Cena. HHH said that they owed Rollins a debt. He said they are going to give Rollins the chance to make history again. HHH said that match is now a triple threat match, because it includes Seth Rollins. Steph thanked Cena because she said that last week he showed his true integrity by breaking his promise to the WWE Universe, and deep down, he knows what it is best for business. Steph declared it John Cena Appreciation Night. Steph guaranteed to deliver. HHH said its a new Authority, and everyone will get out of it what they put in. And everyone will get what they deserve. HHH said Dolph Ziggler will defend the IC Title against Bad News Barrett next.
Oh Good Corporate Kane Is Back
IC Title match. Barrett backed Ziggler into the corner and landed some kicks. Barrett went for a backdrop but Ziggler landed on his feet and hit a dropkick and elbow for two. Barrett caught Ziggler going for a leapfrog and landed a kick to the gut. Ziggler escaped a headlock. Barrett went for a sideslam but Ziggler countered into a pin and got the three count.
WINNER: Dolph Ziggler, BUT…
After the match Barrett attacked Ziggler. He threw Dolph twice into the barricade then on to the announce table. Barrett threw Ziggler into the steps and then the ringpost. Back in the ring Barrett tossed Ziggler into the post a few times.
Kane came out and said that in all of this excitement, they forgot to mention this match is two out of three falls.
The second fall started right away and Barrett hit a boot followed by Wasteland for the three, to pick up the second fall.
Back from break Ziggler shoved off doctors but walked right into another Wasteland but kicked out at two. Barrett put Ziggler in the ropes then connected on a knee. Ziggler escaped an armbar but Barrett moved out of the way of a dropkick. Barrett continued to dominate until Dolph caught him with a neckbreaker. Barrett came right back with the Winds of Change. Barrett missed the Bullhammer Elbow and Dolph caught him with a superkick for two. Kane got on the apron but Dolph caught him with a superkick. Ziggler then walked right into a Bullhammer Elbow, giving him the win and the IC Title.
WINNER and NEW Intercontinental Champion: Bad News Barrett
John Cena Moment: His Debut.
Roman Reigns was interviewed. Renee Young asked him what Big Show can expect. He made some Superman references but then said Big Show can expect him, so believe that.
Bray Wyatt said tonight would be the end of Dean Ambrose.
The Ascension made quick work of a couple jobbers. Before the match, they cut a promo saying they were more powerful and destructive than Demolition and the Road Warriors.
Big Show: The Heat Vacuum
Big Show vs Roman Reigns. Show took control early with a shoulder to the gut. Show landed some shots to the back then a bodyslam. Reigns tried fighting back but Big Show continued to land body shots. Show stood on Reigns a couple of times then applied a bear hug. Reigns escaped and landed a few clotheslines before finally knocking him down with one. Reigns hit a Samoan Drop. He went for the Superman Punch but Show grabbed him and tossed him outside the ring. On the outside Show caught Reigns with a thrust kick then hit Reigns with the steps, causing a DQ.
WINNER via DQ: Roman Reigns
After the match Show went back into the ring, but Reigns recovered and hit a Spear on Show, sending the steps onto the head of Big Show.
Natalya beat Nikki in a non Title match. Paige took out Brie on the outside which caused a distraction, allowing Natalya to roll up Nikki. Nikki took out Natalya after the match but Paige made the save.
Luke Harper vs Erick Rowan, with Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury as referees. Rowan threw Harper into the corner but the refs blocked a splash. Rowan hit a spinning heel kick but Noble and Mercury didn’t make the count. Harper then connected on a clothesline and a fast count gave Harper the win. After the match Noble and Mercury took out Rowan. Rowan tried fighting back but Harper came back and hit a clothesline.
John Cena Moment: Being Drafted to RAW in 2005
Who Puts Tables and Chairs In An Ambulance?
Ambulance Match. Both men quickly went to the floor. Ambrose tossed Bray over the announce table. Ambrose dumped Bray over the barricade and the two brawled through the crowd. They got to the ambulance where Dean tossed Bray into the door. Bray ended up tossing Dean in the ambulance but Dean hopped out and kicked Bray. Ambrose hit a DDT then pulled some tables out of the back of the ambulance. Bray recovered during this and tossed Ambrose onto the ramp.
The two worked their way back to the ring. Bray caught Ambrose with an uppercut then slammed Ambrose into the barricade. Back from break Bray hit a splash in the corner. Bray went for Sister Abigail but Ambrose escaped, then bounced off the ropes and hit a clothesline. Ambrose landed some punches but Bray came back with a clothesline of his own. Bray threw Ambrose into the barricade on the outside. They got near the ambulance. Bray sent Ambrose back on to the stage. Bray set a table up but Ambrose jumped off the stage and hit a clothesline. Bray put Ambrose in the ambulance but Ambrose threw a chair at him from inside. Dean put Bray into the ambulance but Bray came out and sent Ambrose face first into the door. Bray caught Ambrose with a right hand but Ambrose came back with a clothesline. Ambrose hit Bray with the stretcher board. Ambrose set Bray up on a table then went to the top of the ambulance and jumped off the ambulance and through the table. Both men tried to recover and Bray hit Sister Abigail into the ambulance. Bray put Dean into the ambulance. Dean fought out but Bray hit Sister Abigail on the floor this time. Bray put Dean into the ambulance and won the match.
WINNER: Bray Wyatt
This Crowd Is Bored
The Usos and Naomi vs Miz, Damien Mizdow and Alicia Fox. Naomi hit Alicia with a quick Lou Thesz press and a clothesline before Alicia tagged in Miz. Jey hit a hip toss on Miz then Mizdow did it as well. The distraction allowed Miz to hit a neckbreaker. Miz tossed Jey to the outside and tagged in Mizdow. Mizdow went for a dive to the outside but Miz tagged himself back in and applied a headlock. Jey escaped a headlock and there was a double clothesline. Jimmy got the tag and hit a Samoan drop. Alicia blocked a butt splash but Naomi came in and hit a hurricarrana. Jimmy went to go off the ropes but Naomi was there and Jimmy stopped himself. Miz rolled up Jimmy to pick up the win.
WINNERS: Miz, Damien Mizdow and Alicia Fox
Kane Is Very Forgetful Tonight
Ryback came out for his match with Seth Rollins. Kane came out and said it’s a handicap match. Kane caught Ryback with an elbow but Ryback came back with a Lou Thesz press. Ryback hit a shoulder tackle off the top then a handful of splashes. Kane backed Ryabck into the corner and Rollins tagged himself in. Ryback hit a few Flair chops. Rollins bailed to the outside. Ryback tossed Kane to the outside then press slammed Rollins off the top then sent him to the outside into commercial.
Kane and Rollins were still in control back from break. Ryback hit a belly-to-belly on Kane but Rollins made the blind tag and came in and hit a dropkick. Ryback escaped a headlock but Kane tagged himself in. Ryback eventually started a comeback. He hit a powerslam and spinebuster on Rollins. He went for the Meathook. J & J distracted him but he still hit it. Kane came in and Ryback hit Shell Shocked on him. But Rollins came in and hit two Curb Stomps to pick up the win.
WINNERS: Seth Rollins and Kane
Big E beat Adam Rose via DQ after Cesaro and Tyson Kidd, dressed as Rosebuds, attacked him and the rest of New Day.
And This Is Stupid…
Triple H and Steph came out to celebrate John Cena Appreciation Night. She said this has been a decade in the making and brought him out. They replayed the end of RAW last week. Steph said that Cena was her hero. Triple H said he told HBK that the first time he was in the ring with Cena he said he sucked. But then he changed and he started to see the greatness in Cena. HHH said last week maybe he saw something different in Cena. He said he may see a Cena that only knows what is best for business, and that he appreciates Cena.
HHH wanted to bring out some other people who should appreciate Cena. HHH brought out Ryback, Erick Rowan and Dolph Ziggler. HHH said that they have shown they have great admiration for John Cena. And when they won, they knew there wasn’t going to be consequences. But Cena threw that all away. HHH said Erick Rowan was thrown into it at the last minute. HHH suggested a 30 day suspension. Steph said that means Ryback should get 60 days. Dolph said that must mean Ziggler should get suspended for 90 says.
HHH and Steph went up the ramp to have their own conversation. Steph said that instead of suspensions, they are all fired. And they can all thank John Cena for it. Confetti, balloons and streamers came down from the ceiling as Hail to the Chief played as Cena stood in shock and disbelief.
FINAL THOUGHTS
I was willing to give the Authority coming back so soon a shot, but it completely backfired in their first week back. We started with the same old HHH promo to start the show, followed by the typical heel authority figure being bullies all night, then firing everyone from Team Cena. If they really wanted to do this, they could have just had Team Authority win at Survivor Series, then fire everyone, then have Sting come back and avenge the Authority and get their jobs back. But nope, we wasted the last six weeks away and they are now meaningless.
The rest of the show was nothing special. Bray Wyatt beat Dean Ambrose, and the WWE moved on like it was nothing. I guess Dean Ambrose will just never win a meaningful feud on WWE TV. But I guess Bray Wyatt has to look strong for the Undertaker or something. What’s next for Dean Ambrose? And will it even have any meaning at all? Tonight was the perfect example of the WWE’s short sighted booking and how they can’t plan ahead at all. Nothing about the show was good, and it wasn’t a good start to 2015. Show gets a 2.
Until Next Time,
Justin C
Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka
