Hello and welcome to My Pinterest Is Piledrivers. I’m gonna dedicate this column to someone who gets a lot of shit on the Internet, even from me time to time (it was a solid joke, no regrets). Roman Reigns. He’s not the most popular guy in the WWE (though not for Vince’s trying) but he really doesn’t deserve to be the most unpopular, either.
Roman gets assaulted by both wrestlers and female fans
Okay, let’s put aside our “hurr hurr I wish I was him hurr hurr” reflexes and look at that as it is… something deeply creepy. That is a stranger that he’s never met before, stroking his arm and trying to hold his hand. And honestly that’s not even his most unnerving experience.
I’m all for gender equality, so this means I have to call out disturbingly forward female fans in addition to you creepy dudes. You know who you are.
Hands to yourselves, everyone.
The dude isn’t that bad on the mic
His main problems are inexperience, not being a natural prodigy like the always-good Rock, Punk or Ambrose, and maybe as a result of the previous two issues, having his promos scripted by failed soap opera writers. He’s perfectly fine going off the cuff.
His promos are getting more and more natural, maybe as he’s growing more confident both doing them, and in just ignoring their suggestions backstage and saying what he feels like.
You can’t honestly tell me he’s way worse than a lot of the roster. And he’s improving still.
He’s young, fresh and has some unique moves
Unlike a lot of the WWE’s big men, Roman hasn’t been around for over 17 years. He’s young and agile, instead of puffy and slow. He can do cool stuff like the Superman Punch, the Apron Dropkick and the assisted powerbomb.
We’re punishing him for not being Daniel Bryan or Dolph Ziggler
Vince probably saw the reaction the Shield got, and how the humidity of the arena rose every time Roman came within ten feet of a female fan
and decided to push him. This upsets many because Daniel Bryan is being seen as being held down… when according to recent news reports we oughtta be thanking Vince and Trips in asking him to take it slow and ending matches early, because if Daniel is this young and having this many injuries we’re gonna be lucky if he can wrestle at all soon enough. Yeah, after being sent home from the European tour, maybe it’s not so bad that Daniel didn’t get taken to Suplex City.
Yeah it sucks that largely, guys like Cesaro, Ambrose and Ziggler aren’t all near the top of the card, but then again, neither are guys like the Miz or Sheamus anymore. I’ll take a Roman over a Miz any day of the week.
What does the WWE need to do to help Roman? For one, stop scripting his promos. Stop scripting everyone’s promos. Also, the fact that he still wrestles in tactical gear, enters from the crowd and has the same theme as the Shield seems a little desperate. Mix it up a bit. You can keep the crowd entrance since it’s exciting for the live audience, just make sure security deals with these jackasses-
unless you give Roman carte blanche to knock his teeth out. Then… we have a new most popular face.
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Tags: Cesaro, Daniel Bryan, dean ambrose, Dolph Ziggler, miz, Roman Reigns, Sheamus, The Shield, Triple H, VInce McMahon