Break The Walls Down: Top 10 Things On Chris Jericho’s List


Top 10 Things On Chris Jericho’s List

Chris Jericho was been left frustrated in recent weeks, and aired his grievances to key culprit, General Manager Mick Foley, on Raw. Initially making a list of problems with the Hardcore Legend himself, The List began to escalate and include a variety of people and issues that Jericho has taken exception to. The Ayatollah Of Rock N Rolla didn’t elaborate much further. Luckily for one and all, I’ve managed to find his notes and compiled the most prominent purveyors. While you might think Triple H, CM Punk and even the whole of WCW might feature, let’s see who, or what, makes… The List. Drink it in maaaaaaaan…

These two did not get on. Jericho has always had a smidgen of small man syndrome, which is ridiculous considering his size compared with the normal diaspora of human gelatiny. Add to that the fact that massive dudes look down on the supposedly diminutive Canadian and sparks can fly. That’s exactly what happened with Bill Goldberg. After reportedly refusing to face Jericho on PPV during their WCW days, on Goldberg’s very first day in WWE they locked horns, and somehow the smaller man came out on top with a choke hold. Classic heel.

He loves a waistcoat. He loves a scarf. Hell, he loves a big ass light up jacket. But shirts? Hates them. Won’t wear them. Burns them on sight.

Kevin Nash
Another big man that Jericho has had beef with, and not the good type of beef with a Yorkshire pudding and some horseradish on the side. Big Nasty has never liked cruiserweights, probably because a moonsault to Nash is like intelligence to Trump. Impossible to achieve. He once termed lighter wrestlers, “vanilla midgets”, which, aside from being hilarious, is a bizarre backhand. Having bracketed Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero in that mould, Nash claimed that “wrestling died” when they were on top, understandably incensing close friend Chris Jericho. They had words on Twitter, which these days is tantamount to a world war.

Being A Babyface
Out of 6 World Title reigns, 6 were as a heel. The maths is indisputable.

Brock Lesnar
Putting Brock Lesnar on any list other than ‘Leave Well Alone’ is potentially stupidly idiotic. However, Jericho, by definition, is no stupid idiot. When The Beast unleashed rivers of crimson from Randy Orton’s noggin at Summerslam, our hero apparently stormed to Gorilla Position to demand whether or not the spot was scripted. When he wasn’t given a straight answer, like an utter madman, Jericho accosted the former UFC Champion, who laughed in his face. A scuffle ensued. Awesome. Like a loyal pitbull, Jericho stood up for himself, his friend and his business against a man who he thought was taking advantage of it. Lesnar, consider yourself… Listed.

That’s right, The Best In The World At What He Does despises an entire nation, like a big old racist xenophobe. Taking his natural talent for heeling the crap out of a room to extreme levels, Y2J incited the wrath of Sao Paolo when he denigrated the Brazilian flag at a live event. In a hilarious call back to the genuine days of kayfabe, police actually halted the match and forced him to apologise or face incarceration. Sadly, Jericho said sorry. He should’ve thrown that green and yellow monstrosity in their faces in an ultimate act of douchebaggery and been dragged off to a hole in Recife, never to be seen or heard from again.

Superstar Billy Graham
Jericho is understandably prickly upon the subject of Chris Benoit’s death. When Billy Graham, amongst others, weighed in with what Jericho considered unsubstantiated claims and opinions, he spoke out. Superstar’s response was a gloriously unnecessary diatribe. “Jericho… You have the face of a choirboy, but you’ve got the heart of a devil. One day, someone will walk across your skull on the floor of hell. If you walked by right now, I would beat the living hell out of you, then spit on your grave for trying to destroy my reputation.” I mean, fuck.

Thumb Tacks
Not sure if you heard, but Dean Ambrose caused Jericho to have 69 tacks surgically removed from his body after their Ambrose Asylum match at Extreme Rules. Having not taken a tack bump before, it’s safe to say it’ll be a first and last for the Sexy Beast.

Dean Malenko
The Jericho and Malenko feud is stuff of WCW legend. From the classic match ups, to the Man Of 1004 Holds, to the masked Ciclope, this type of writing in a man v man programme is sometimes lacking in the modern day product. If in character, Jericho would likely have Malenko as one of the first names on The List. In reality, this rivalry effectively made him, plus they’re good buddies. Lame.

Finishing Lists
Jericho initially found fame for his first list, and having mastered 3 more holds than nemesis Malenko, he wrote them all down and started reading them out on an episode of WCW Nitro in 1998. He didn’t technically finish that list until last year. That’s an 18 year wait, which clearly indicates that he hates finishing lists. Expect him not to finish this one until circa 2034.

Jericho List

Tags: , , , , , ,