Impact Wrestling 1/19/17 Recap – Moose vs. Galloway Grand Title Match

A recap of Lashley vs. EC3 starts things off before Race for the Case begins. The Broken Hardys, Eli Drake, Decay, Jessie, Shera, the DCC, Tyrus, and the Helms Dynasty all compete for a variety of brightly-colored briefcases. Eli gets the red case, Lee dives onto a pile after grabbing the blue case. Steve eats a spike piledriver from Kingston and Bram, and Jessie gets the yellow case – but Bram steals it. The Hardys grab the green case, which matches Jeff’s gear. The cases are apparently all numbered and number 1 gets to name the title they get a shot at. Even by TNA standards, this stip was quite poorly-conceived and explained even worse.

A Drew Galloway highlight video airs showing his debut in 2015. We see Moose and Lashley’s history at Destination X for some reason. Drew Galloway cuts a promo about wanting the Grand Championship to prove he’s the best in the world. Drew vs. Moose is up tonight for the Grand Title. EC3 vs. Lashley from last week is recapped once again. Lashley talks smack to Eddie and insults him, and then Eddie cuts a promo – and a fairly bad one, in response. God bless him, but talking is not his strong suit. Lashley basically calls him a coward, so Eddie accepts his offer for an iron man match and then Lashley slugs him. Davey makes the save for Eddie.

Maria calls Braxton and tell him to answer the next time he calls. Brooke meets with Maria, who sums her up as the girl who just shakes her butt. Brooke tells her to leave her alone and let her do her own thing. Deonna Purazzo comes out to face Brooke. Brooke shakes her ass, but the camera doesn’t get a good shot of it. While Brooke walks around, Deonna just rolls around for some reason. Brooke wins a fairly basic match, but her offense looked fine – outside of her face plant finisher, which looked deadly.

Sienna jumps Brooke and hits a tree slam before hitting a pounce. Braxton tells Maria that Allie is beautiful and doesn’t need to be surrounded by people like Maria. He tells her that she can’t boss him around, and she wants him to meet Laurel. Eli brings us to his goofy talk show that now has a laugh track. The DCC looks absolutely ridiculous in this setting – and they already look pretty silly. Eli gets case 4, which is bad for some reason that isn’t really explained.

The DCC all does comedy based on who will represent them by raising their hands at the same time. They get case 2, so…good for them? Trevor does some amusing comedy struggling to get the case unlocked, resulting in a DUMMY YEAH button. He got case 3, while Jeff has case 1. We see Matt go crazy and then Drew wins the World Title. Clips of Moose vs. Bennett are shown. Braxton meets with Allie and tells her they shouldn’t be together. Allie wants an explanation and cries while wearing an awesome I Donut Care shirt.

Rockstar Spud introduces Aron Rex doing a bad third grade play’s version of Liberace. Josh talks about him transitioning into…something. Something is a fitting term to describe this gimmick. Robbie comes out and insults Rex before bringing Swoggle out for a tag match. Rex says that Robbie got Swoggle for half price. Swoggle hands onto Rex and he tells Spud HE’S TOUCHING ME! E runs wild on Rex before Swoggle comes in and butt-butts Rex in the corner before stinkfacing Spud. Spud knuck shots Swoggle and Rex lays on him to win. Okay then.

Drew vs. EC3 clips are shown and we see Drew turn on Rex – reminding us of the peak of Rex in TNA…mere months ago. Josh hypes up the Genesis show next week, with Jade vs. Jade in a monster’s ball. Eddie faces Lashley for the title in an iron man match. Jade vs. Rosemary in the cage is recapped and we get some great camera angles of her cage dive.

Braxton drives away with LVN, looking rather sad. Drew comes out to face Moose, where they go back and forth with a lot of strikes and a few holds for the first round. Drew wins round 1 with a 1 point lead. Drew hits an AA on the apron from the floor – ouch! Moose hits a pop-up powerbomb and gets a senton for 2. The moonsault misses and he locks on the Iron Maiden. Drew lost the round somehow and they start off with a Frye-Takayama exchange. Drew SOMEHOW avoids the Game Changer twice, what with it having a giant tell and a huge opening window to avoid it. Moose dropkicks Drew in mid-air, causing Pope to seemingly orgasm in glee at this mundane move. Drew kicks him low before the ref stops the clock and gives him a point deduction – so that’s a thing you can do now. Not a bad idea, but it should have been established at the beginning. Drew hits the claymore kick and wins the title. Solid match – easily the best thing on this otherwise nothing show.

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