Extreme Retro Review #010: ECW HCTV 06/01/93

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EXTREME RETRO REVIEW #10:

Eastern Championship Wrestling

HARDCORE TV 06/01/93

Hosts: Sulli & Stevie

Location: Cabrini Field House, Philly

Attendance: 175… Maybe

-Hosts recap last week’s tag title change and the format for this week. Paul E. comes out and suckers Stevie out of the color seat. Paul is on color for this episode.

-Replay of the tag title match.

Super Destroyer #1 (w/ HQR3) vs. “Wildman” Sal Bellomo

Early ECW referee Jim Molineux sighting. Lockup around the corners, THE REF BREAKS THEM UP. Paul E. is sewing the seeds of the refs relaxing the rules. It feels like Paul is trying to ease the viewer into his vision for wrestling. The match is the shits. Couple of kids in the crowd with “chili bowl” haircuts. Bellomo tries to unmask #1 and I guess #2 has already been unmasked. (I guess I missed that.) #2 comes in and they beat up Bellomo for the DQ. (-1000) Cairo runs-in but they no-sell him. They beat up Cairo and now Bellomo/Cairo clear the ring… Bellomo then turns and DECKS CAIRO and powders… That’ll teach Cairo for being a Goof.

Tommy Cairo & Glen Osbourne vs. Hot Stuff International (TV Champ Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka & “Hot Stuff” Eddie Gilbert)

Gilbert dumps Osbourne early and gives him some chair shots across the back. Gilbert hits Osbourne with the timekeeper’s hammer. Gilbert pours pop (I’m from Ohio… Its pop) on Osbourne and hits him with the can. Osbourne with the comeback with wrestling moves. Cairo in the ring with wrestling moves, but its an extended squash with some face shine. Gilbert hits Osbourne with the can again (LOL.) Cairo with the quick comeback but is cut-off by Gilbert with the “Hot Shot” FTW. (DUD)

J.T. Smith vs. Max Thrasher

Pre-Match, Thrasher has a hockey mask on. Quick start to the match, but we’re interrupted by a special announcement. Sulli shows clips of the first show from the “ECW ARENA” It’s about 25 people in the crowd. The ring apron has a GOD-AWFUL banner that has “Eastern” on it. The clip is from the Battle Royal to crown the first Pennsylvania State Champion… Oh boy. Final 3: Cairo, Stetson and Larry Winters. Stetson gets dumped by Winters (Breakup angle of Les Mullets) Les Mullets is gonna explode at the Sizzler.

-Clip of the Super D’s vs. the Suicide Blondes which furthers the Bellomo angle. I’m sure Bellomo unmasked Super D #2 here. Chris Michaels is added to the Blondes to make it a Freebird group. At least Michaels is a blonde.

-Clip of Snuka vs. ROAD WARRIOR HAWK. Muraco with a piledriver. Of course, Hawk no-sells that. Dark Patriot with a run-in.

-Clip of Dark Patriot (Doug Gilbert) throwing J.T. Smith off the Eagle’s nest.

Back to Thrasher/Smith. Smith gets punched in the corner. Thrasher with his feet on the ropes for the pin. Ref sees and interjects. Smith then does the SAME THING FTW. (-Billion)

-Funk promo for the Sizzler. Moving On.

ECW Heavyweight Title Match: “The Magnificent” Don “The Rock” Muraco (w/Paul E. Dangerously) vs. Mr. Sandman (w/ Peaches)

Quick roll-up for 2 by the champ. A bunch of nothing in slow motion happens afterwards. Clothesline to the gut by Sandman. The challenger powders and has a pow-wow with Paul E. Back in the ring, snug heel work but Muraco powders again. WTF does Peaches have on? I thought it was a “skort”, but its just as hideous. Sandman with small packages and backslides is LOL. Muraco finally takes over. His tighty-whiteys are showing under his tights. (SMH.) Sloppy comeback by the champ. Paul E. run-in, followed by Peaches, FOLLOWED by The Rockin’ Rebel, who grabs Peaches. Sandman gets Rebel. Ref bump. Sandman with a sleeper hold, Paul E. with the phone to Sandman’s head. New Champ (DUD) The rest of the “Hot Stuff Alliance” get into the ring to celebrate.

-Sulli and Stevie wrap-up with “Dangerous International.” Muraco cuts a promo like he won an Academy Award. He doesn’t know where he is. Snuka interjects talking about TCB. He must have been around OMC at this point in his life. See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya.

Overall: Bad Show but I lol’ed at some stuff. Thumbs Down.

Listen to the audio version of this episode via Youtube:

Peace.

Scourge of the IWC. 49 issues away from a complete run of Uncanny X-Men (1963). Critical Thinker; GI Billed-College Grad, Gen-Xer Parent and Libertarian in theory, Arm-Chair Anarchist in Execution.