Well, I’m rushing it this week. I’ve been sick, almost became an amputee via the physical for the FDNY, and have shoveled so much snow I may just need a backeeotomy. So I’ll hit my major points and then be gone. On with the show…
He’ll Stick It In Your Kanyon
So it came out that Kanyon…err…came out. My immediate thought, said by the ever-fantastical Eric S was “Work”. Why would I think it was a work? Because there have been gay guys in wrestling before and who gives a shit. If Benoit were gay, would any of you care? No f*cking way! Also, who didn’t realize something was different about Kanyon. The Mortis costume? The Lisp? C’mon! So what comes out today? More Kanyon! He puts out a statement asking whether he is gay or Kanyon is gay. Now, in this statement he sounds like Warrior Warrior, so my thoughts are in bold:
CHRIS KANYON IS THE FIRST EVER OPENLY GAY ACTIVE PRO ATHLETE IN THE FIVE MAJOR MALE US SPORTS OF PRO BASEBALL, BASKETBALL, WRESTLING, FOOTBALL, OR HOCKEY. Now, the question is this: Am I, Chris Klucsarits, the person behind the pro wrestling character known as Kanyon, the person who wrestles as Kanyon, am I also homosexual? Is the Kanyon character partially autobiographical, a complete mirror image of Chris Klucsarits, or a total work of fiction? Well, that’s for you to think about, wonder, guess, ignore or whatever. I am throwing it out there. It is up to you to see how you react. What your knee-jerk reaction is. What your beliefs are. And, to figure out why you feel and think and react to this news as you have and will do. Pro Wrestling, in my opinion, has become too easy. It has become mindless. I offer you the opportunity to think past good guy, bad guy, heel, face, sport, real, fake and storyline. I offer you a “character” that makes you think not about the “creative team”, or the commissioner, or the owner, promoter, booker or even the wrestler. I offer you a “character” that forces you to look internally, at yourself, at your thoughts, beliefs and feelings. A character that can help you define yourself and how you think and what you believe. I offer you this: The first ever self proclaimed and titled GSBLT (Gay Straight Bisexual Lesbian Transgender) Champion of the World. Is this a joke? A scam? Reality? You decide.
Ok, when did someone start the GSBLTW? I thought Feinstein was in jail? He criticizes by saying he is offering a “character” that gets you to think about yourself. Well, I’m not gay so why would I look deep inside me? Basically, in his opening f*cking paragraph, Kanyon makes it well known that his character is nothing better than Chuck or Billy.
I have been wrestling professionally now for 14 years. Starting in 1992, I wrestled three years part-time and than in 1995, it became my full time profession working for AOL Time Warner’s WCW (World Championship Wrestling) based out of Atlanta, Georgia, airing many, many hours per week on WTBS, TNT, and in syndication. I worked for WCW and was consistently on TV from 1995 until 2001 (including a reign as WCW tag team champ with DDP, Diamond Dallas Page). Than, in 2001, Vince McMahon and the WWF (World Wrestling Federation) bought WCW. Soon after buying WCW, I was hired by Vince McMahon and quickly became US Heavyweight Champion and again, along with DDP, a World Tag Team Champ, as we won the WWF tag team championship. Since then the WWF became the WWE (World Wrestling Entertainment) and I was fired from the WWE in February 2004. I have continued to wrestle on and off since than on the independent wrestling scene throughout this country and in Canada. Last Saturday, in Sudbury, Ontario, Canada,  I wrestled for an independent group named BSE (Blood Sweat and Ears), where for the first time publicly, I announced that Kanyon was actually the first ever openly gay active Pro wrestler. Other things were said in the in-ring interview, and unless you get a transcript or a video copy of the interview, I would prefer you not try and report what was said, for I do not want anything taken out of context. I have already read a good bit of misinformation on what I said. For more information on that show, please check out www.bloodsweatandears.com . For more info on my career and on me, check out my official website at WWW.ChrisKanyon.net and my MySpace page at WWW.Myspace.com/ChrisKanyon.
Why do I need the to see his resume? This sounds like something he is going to put out to the AP and expect to be picked up big time. This, my loyal readers, is a ploy to get a f*cking job. Not to mention the fact that he wrestled for and announced this at an event for Blood, Sweat and Ears…what is that, a f*cking Canadian Mick Foley Tribute League? What an asshole this guy is…heh…
Now, some will say that this is no big deal. That there have been other gay characters, from Gorgeous George, to Adrian Adonis, to Adrian Street, to Lenny and Lodi, to the WWE’s “gay marriage duo” of Chuck and Billy. But there are many differences between them and I. I believe all of them, when asked out of character if they were gay or not, would say that they were straight. My answer to that question is, at this moment, what does it matter? Ultimately, you will know the truth, but the question now is less about me and more about you, how you deal with and perceive the question and possible answers. The question is less about my sexuality and more about our society and how homosexuality fits into sports, entertainment and our culture in general. This is so much bigger than me, my sexuality, and pro wrestling. This topic touches on individual beliefs, understandings and Perceptions, as well as religion, psychology and sociology. It is not often that a wrestling “character” can cover and cross that many topics and boundaries. And this is just the beginning.
Fag! No, seriously, there is nothing more different between Kanyon and Adonis or Street. The only thing that is different is that Kanyon is trying to make this a shoot to garner publicity. The others played characters and played them “well” enough to gain publicity.
One other thing I want to touch on. HAHAHAHAHA
I know there are some guys on the independent wrestling scene who play gay characters and some who I believe also claim to be openly gay and/or bisexual. And I do not want to take anything away from them. After the interview I did in the ring in Sudbury, Ontario and the reaction I got, I realize how hard it is to be “an openly gay wrestling character.” So for all the independent gay characters and those claiming to be openly gay or bisexual, I have nothing but respect for you. But, I feel if you have not made your full time living as a pro wrestler, that if you needed a “real job” or another job to pay your bills and help support yourself, that you are not truly a “Professional” wrestler. I would say you participate in Pro Wrestling as a hobby, and maybe make a few bucks at it, but that you are not really a “Professional Wrestler”.. maybe an amateur Pro Wrestler. If I enter a local bowling tournament and I win the tourney and a few bucks, I am not going to run around telling everyone I am a pro bowler. But, once again, that is for each individual to determine for themselves
I’m going to determine it for myself right now. If you are taking a bump in a ring in a staged contest, you’re a pro wrestler. Some don’t get paid shit. Kanyon is one of them. He used to get paid good money, now he doesn’t. Talk about looking for a way back in and being an asshole while he’s at it.
So what now? Well, I definitely want my career to continue, either on the independent scene, in the WWE or for the newer company, NWA TNA (Total Nonstop Action), which tapes its Television shows and airs its PPV’s live from Orlando’s Universal Studios. A very smart person recently told me that a wise man never makes promises. I was told to beware of those who do make promises. With that in mind, my promise is this: I promise nothing. But ultimately, and probably more sooner than later, I will tell the truth about the sexuality of me, Chris Klucsarits, the man behind the Kanyon character. I am hoping to do so within the next month, but again, I cant make any promises, and I am determined now to just go with the flow, like a twig in the current of a mighty river. See what life brings me and enjoy the ride.ÂÂÂ
The desperate voice of a man in need of a job…ridiculous. But I did giggle like a child when I read the “like a twig in the current of a mighty river”.
Well, that’s what happens…
Bob Orton has been released. That’s what happens when you give people blood born diseases. At the very least he can now go touring with Juvi.
And now for something completely hilarious
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
This segment is dedicated to the memory of Eddie Guerrero
EDITORS NOTE: I was just informed that the video above was not working. I checked YouTube to see what happened and the video has been pulled. So, as kind as I am at midnight on a Monday, I will recap the video, kind of.
The video is of a young Vince McMahon talking about how the superstars of the World Wrestling Federation have become larger than life and role models. Therefore the WWF has instituted a stringent drug policy to test for EVERYTHING. Even anabolic steroids. He then closes off his speech with something to the effect of: “When you see this logo, you can be assured of drug free sports and entertainment for the whole family.”
So, there is your recap…HAHAHAHAHAHA Vince you funny guy!
Once again, I dedicate this to Eddie Guerrero.
Fun Fact That Pisses Me Off
CM Punk is dating Maria
That pisses me off. Straight edge my balls.
I’m So Bitter and So Lonely
I really don’t like Test. I’ll be honest. If the only person that can carry you to a good match is the bosses real son, you just suck. Now Test thinks he is Scherer because he doesn’t get comped and can write anti-WWE messages. At least he didn’t say he was gay, but this is just as stupid. Again, I’m BOLD
Hey everyone..what’s up? Well just when I think the WWE can’t get any lower and I don’t mean attendance and payoffs…..What I have seen of the handling of Eddies death wants to make me puke. You know? When Eddie past away, I said to a friend of mine that instead of mourning I betcha Vince is thinkn of how he can make money out of this? Not to say I said so but to be honest I didn’t see the burning of Eddies low ryder..I heard about it which was enufff to make me sick then…and now I see Randy Orton saying ” Eddie is in hell”…is that how desperate this company is right now…I wonder what does Eddies wife and three beautifull children think when they hear people saying that their husband and father are in hell? According to reports, they think “DINERO!” because they’re coming to No Way Out. Is there no boundaries to this…disgrace..this…CHEAP heat. I wonder how Eddies kids feel when they go to school{and we all know how cruel children can be} and get ridiculed and made fun of because their dad is supposidly in hell? I wonder how Eddies wife feels when the man she stood by for so long and changed his life around is being told to MILLIONS of people that her husband is in hell? Well if Eddie was in hell Vince would know because he’s the one who would have to let him in and I guarnateee that’s not where Eddie is! Ohhhh, Tests’s BIG LINE! Vince let Eddie into hell! Because Vince is…ALIVE…you dumb f*ck. Classy guys..real FN classy! On a positive note isn’t great to see Stacy dance? SNIFF SNIFF She’s is so so talented and now she gets to showcase what she was always the greatest at…dancing…she’s gonna win the whole thing and please, please everyone vote for her, she has worked so hard for this and as you can see. she deserves it! I HAD A LIFE! I COULD’VE BEEN WITH HER! WAAAAAAAHHHHH! She looks like a real pro out there and I’d love to see here go on to better things and on that note, I see how there was no mention of her PERFECT scores on Raw they were to busy showing some girl I have never seen before in a superbowl comercial…oh that’s right it’s the girl who is doing playboy not the most talented girl they have who is on one of the most popular shows and kicking ass at it too!! This is my open letter begging Stacy to take me back. Why would you wanna showcase Stacy?Maybe because she has stood by her morales and turned playboy down several times!! Gee, I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that her contract is up soon and I’m sure they offered her a hell of a deal I’d say right about now the wwe needs Stacy more than she needs them. I always said she didn’t belong in this business and she was meant to do better and bigger things and by the looks of it she is well on her way! Stacy is a good person and a good friend. Don’t forget to vote for her guys and go get em Keibs!!! You deserve it! Just because you have the phone number of the girl you want, it doesn’t mean you are her friend, you f*cking loser. Now to confirm my statement that he is a f*cking loser, read the rest of his “blog” I just got back from Italy and had a blast! It was a short trip, I had 2 matches. My first was with Mark Jindrak no I’m just kiddin, Mark is a hell of an athlete and a funny guy, he just never realy got a chance to showcase that in wwe. Thanks for doin the J O B Mark…lol. My 2nd match was with Matt Morgan. We had a pretty good match especially considering the fact Matt has only been working for 2 years. Is it just me or do they just bring up guys who aren’t ready yet and give them about 1 week to get over and if you don’t, back to OVW. Matt with a little more experience will be very good but hey they did give him a great gimmick, let’s take this physically impresssive athlete and make him…stutter..now that’s money. not! I want to thank everyone at NWE in Italy, you guys treat me like royalty 20 dollars a night and free head from a woman with a goatee is “royalty” and I want to thank you all for all your kindness..this company is no joke, it’s not an Indy fed it’s the real deal! Very very professional! Thankyou guys for making me love wrestling again and remember why I got into in the first place beacuse it was fun and thanks for not making me wear a suit and paying for my food and hotel..lol..Thanks Kish, Roberto, Fabrizio, Puka and my buddy Stene. anyways that’s all for now..take care and guys thanyou for all your positve comments, you guys make my day even the negative comments make laugh as well…that’s all for now”¨Andrew
Again folks and wrestlers alike, stop f*cking putting up stupid blogs.
By Any Means Necessary
– WWE is trying to enter into a working relationship with NJPW. If they want Brock back so bad, offer him something decent. Believe me, I don’t like Brock at all. But if WWE is pushing this hard to get him back, they should just offer him the moon.
Ok…I’m done for this week because I am done for this week. Next week I tackle Warrior, Goldberg, Christian and MTV among other things. Until then, click X, go back to wrestling.insidepulse.com and click on me again! I need hits bitches! Adios
PS: I slept with your mom last night. Thanks.
