This Week in ‘E – Spoiler Alert! Spoiler Alert

Columns, Features

SmackDown, ECW and Superstars get spoiled, Sheamus has the best week ever and Rey Mysterio looks to go under the knife once again.

Opening Witty Banter
The news was once again pretty light this week but thanks to the WWE crew heading over to Iraq after tonight’s RAW taping I get to spoil ECW, Superstars and SmackDown for you. This year’s Tribute to the Troops will once again be a one-hour special broadcast on NBC sometime before Christmas.

Let’s take some ‘E…

The News of the Week
Here are the spoilers for this coming week’s ECW, Superstars and SmackDown tapings:

Dark Match:
Kaval beat Paul Birchill with the double stomp.

Low Ki to ECW stat~!

ECW:
Abraham Washington Show where he makes fun of Virginia and hosts Zack Ryder and Rosa Mendes. Ryder reads a poem he wrote about Rosa, and Rosa reads one she wrote about Ryder and finishes hers in Spanish. The segment ends with Ryder hopping up and down on the couch Tom Cruise style.

Backstage Ezekiel Jackson apologizes to William Regal but refuses to apologize to Vladimir Kozlov. Regal attempts to get them on the same page before his match.

Goldust defeated William Regal with a rollup. Zeke and Kozlov both reach for Goldust’s leg at the same time and get into a shoving match outside the ring. Regal is distracted and is rolled up. Dissension ensues between the Ruthless Roundtable.

Backstage Paul Birchill begs Tiffany for his job back. The new tag team of Trent Barreta and Caylen Croft, who will debut tonight, interrupts him.

Trent Barreta & Caylen Croft defeated jobbers Bobby Fields & Tyler Hilton. Barreta and Croft won with a Hart Attack type move but with a kick instead of a clothesline. Their theme music is kind of a “Bittersweet Symphony” rip off.

Woo hoo! A new tag team. But no team name?

Backstage Vance Archer says he won’t demand an ECW Title shot like most people and he will savor every moment on his way to the top.

Christian & Shelton Benjamin defeated Ezekiel Jackson & Vladimir Kozlov. When Kozlov went to make a tag later in the match Zeke dropped off the apron and walked away. Shelton pinned Kozlov after Paydirt.

Superstars:
The Hurricane defeated Zack Ryder by disqualification when a masked Paul Birchill comes down and attacks Hurricane.

Burchill as Hurricane’s masked arch-nemesis? I’m digging it.

Dolph Ziggler defeated Matt Hardy with a backslide.

Looks like Dolph’s push isn’t quite done with yet.

SmackDown:
R-Truth defeated CM Punk by disqualification when Luke Gallows (the former Festus) grabbed Truth’s leg for the disqualification. Punk and Gallows laid out Truth post-match.

Kane defeated Mike Knox.

Mickie James defeated Beth Phoenix and Natalya in a Number One Contender’s Triple Threat Match. Michelle McCool and Layla were on commentary.

After the match Mickie cuts a promo on Michelle and attacks her at ringside. Maria makes the save for Mickie when the numbers game takes over.

Backstage, Teddy Long books Batista in a street fight with Rey Mysterio for next week’s show.

Drew McIntrye defeated John Morrison in a non-title match with his butterfly DDT.

CM Punk and Luke Gallows cut a promo backstage discussing Gallows’ transformation.

Vickie Guerrero comes out to address Eric Escobar. She says she wants Escobar to apologize to her. Escobar comes out as a face to apologize for meeting her so she books him in a handicap match against the Hart Dynasty.

Hart Dynasty defeated Eric Escobar following a springboard Hart Attack.

Chris Jericho and Big Show defeated Cryme Tyme in a non-title match. Show barely worked the match but got the win after his one punch to Shad.

Undertaker made his entrance to call out Batista. As he was making his entrance he was jumped by Batista with a steel chair. Batista wore Taker out with a chair all around ringside and finished it off with a spinebuster on a chair in the ring.

Looks like the chair match is set up for TLC.

Post-show Dark Match:
Undertaker defeated Batista and CM Punk in a Triple Threat Match to retain the World Heavyweight Title. Taker continued to sell the beating during the match. Chris Jericho came down to make it a three-on-one until Kane made the save. Taker and Kane delivered stereo chokeslams to Batista and Jericho and Taker gave Punk the Tombstone for the win. After the match Kane chased Punk and Jericho to the back while Batista left. Taker got to do his curtain call posing to end the taping.

Rey Mysterio is expected to have surgery very soon for a nagging knee injury. Mysterio is planning on having a less-invasive surgery than is normally performed on his damaged ACL to allow him to get back into the ring quicker, perhaps as early as the Royal Rumble. This surgery will just be a quick fix as he will still need the full invasive surgery down the road to repair all of the damage. Having missed two of the three WrestleManias due to injuries he isn’t keen on missing another one. His knees are understandably tore up from all of his high-flying tactics over the course of his career.

I can see why Mysterio would want to get back in the ring as quick as possible. He is definitely in the twilight in his career and the long term surgery shouldn’t be too far off anyways.

Speaking of injury, Big Show is also looking at some knee surgery in the very near future as well. It is expected Chris Jericho will carry the workload of the feud with DX and Show will work the TLC pay per view.

Is Jericho getting a tag team partner curse? He and Show have been on fire as Tag Champions and have brought the level of the Tag belts up to where they haven’t been since 2001. I mean the tag belts are more than likely about to main event their first pay per view over the World Championship ever.

Lauren Mayhew, the chick who has been doing the ECW announcing duties in the wake of Lillian Garcia’s departure has already left the company. She had only been working under a short-term deal and left when she and the company couldn’t come together on a long-term contract. She apparently left WWE on good terms and that the door is open for her to return in the future. Tony Chimel will be covering ECW and SmackDown while Justin Roberts takes care of the ring announcing on RAW.

That’s too bad. I was kind of digging her announce style. But now let me say it again…BRING BACK THE FINK!

In sad news, Alexis Pillman, the stepdaughter of Brian Pillman passed away this past weekend following a car accident. She was only 26. No information was surfaced on what happened, but regardless it is very unfortunate. She had worked on the independent circuit though 2008 as a manager under the name Sexy Lexi Pillman and made an appearance at a TNA house show in Cincinnati in June of 2008 where she worked as a ring girl.

My condolences go out to all of Pillman’s loved ones…

Referee Scott Armstrong suffered a legit concussion at Survivor Series when Sheamus accidentally kicked him in the back of the head.

That was a vile kick. I figured it would figure into the story of the match, but turns out that sometimes accidents do happen.

According to azcentral.com, John Cena has been selected as the grand marshal in the Fort McDowell Fiesta Bowl Parade, which will take place on January 2nd.

Damn…that guy really is Captain America isn’t he? On the way to the parade he is going to save a busload of young kids from a burning inferno and save a kitten from a tree.

Speaking of good news, the WWE crew, including Tommy Dreamer, Hornswoggle, Beth Phoenix and Maria teamed up with the Marine Corps. to deliver over 4000 toys for Toys for Tots on Monday.

It’s always nice to report good, heart-warming news for a change.

The Road to…TLC
TLC Match for the Unified WWE Tag Team Championships
DeGeneration X (Shawn Michaels & Triple H) v. Chris Jericho & The Big Show (c)

Tables Match for the WWE Championship
John Cena (c) v. Sheamus

World Championship Match
Undertaker (c) v. Batista

Ladder Match for the ECW Championship
Christian (c) v. Shelton Benjamin

rumored matches:
Kofi Kingston v. Randy Orton

Wrestler of the Week
Week of November 23 – 29: Sheamus
Yeah no one really had a bigger week in WWE this week than the pale Celtic Warrior. After surviving his elimination match at Survivor Series he dominated last week’s three hour RAW. He destroyed Finlay in mere minutes, won the eight-man Breakthrough Battle Royal and then dropped John Cena through a table en route to earning a his first WWE Championship match at the upcoming TLC pay per view. Sheamus definitely got the proverbial “rocket up the ass” push this past week, all in the presence of Jesse Ventura and Vince McMahon. Pretty good week for a guy who just showed up on TV in June of this year.

RAW’s On Tonight!
Actor and stunt man Verne Troyer will be guest hosting RAW this coming week in Baltimore, Maryland. Troyer is best known as “Mini Me” in the Austin Powers movie series. He has also recently in the abysmal Love Guru and will have a part in the upcoming The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus that will be released in September. He also had memorable moments as part of the cast of Vh1’s Surreal Life back in 2005. After wildly successful episodes of RAW hosted by Rowdy Roddy Piper and Jesse “The Body” Ventura, this coming week’s show looks to be full of a plethora of short jokes and bad sitcom humor. Already announced for the show will be DeGeneration X (Shawn Michaels and Triple H) attending “little people’s court” for assaulting WWE’s diminutive performer Hornswoggle two weeks ago.

On Last Week’s Episode…
Eison gives love to a pretty solid edition of SmackDown featuring some solid in-ring action and the evolution of Festus into something actually marketable.

Eison also covers Superstars.

This past week’s three-hour RAW was arguably the best show since the Donald Trump three hour show from back in June and ranks right up there with RAW XV. Innarelli brings the 10 thoughts love, Wheeler continues his awesome series of RAW rants and Marshall has the straight recap.

How They Rated
SmackDown! (11.13.09) –

Superstars (11.19.09) – 1.0

A.M. RAW (11.22.09) – .7

RAW (11.23.09) – 3.3

ECW (11.24.09) –

This is Boring, What Else is There to Read?
Perillo finishes up the last two editions of Pulse’s fantasy draft. Now prepare for the awesome that will come thereafter.

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For more relevant, interesting and exciting wrestling information from your truly, check out my gig as the Pro Wrestling Examiner over at Examiner.com.

Mark was a columnist for Pulse Wrestling for over four years, evolving from his original “Historically Speaking” commentary-style column into the Monday morning powerhouse known as “This Week in ‘E.” He also contributes to other ventures, outside of IP, most notably as the National Pro Wrestling Examiner for Examiner.com and a contributor for The Wrestling Press. Follow me on Twitter here.