The show begins with Senor Benjamin providing a parental advisory before we get a recap of the Hardys vs. Decay feud. We get an operatic rendition of “Obsolete!” while Senor Benjamin digs graves for Decay. Matt tells Senor Benjamin to prepare the personal zoo for visitation, and then Bennett and Maria come out. Bennett is in a baby blue shirt, yellow shoes, and black yoga pants, so he looks more ridiculous than Broken Matt Hardy. Bennett talks about the breakup with Moose, built up for a whole…two months? He says he has fired Moose, so how was he able to wrestle for TNA if he just worked for Bennett?
Dixie comes down and tells him to wrap it up – they want to watch IMPACT WRESTLING and not As the Miracle Turns. Dixie tells him that she doesn’t trust his judgment because of his inexperience in pro wrestling, but she has an idea that will help TNA – she has just signed a hot free agent, Moose – who faces Bennett at BFG. Moose goes to attack Bennett, but Maria tries a belt shot that distracts him, so Bennett escapes. We see clips of a Lashley vs. EC3 press conference with Corgan holding the title between them.
Bennett and Maria complain about facing Moose, and Dixie tells them okay – she’ll just breach their contract. Dixie is offended by how Maria won the title, and yet she does nothing about it. Dixie doesn’t strip her of her title, but takes her power away as knockouts leader. Jade and Gail team up against Sienna and Allie. Allie is being bullied by Sienna down the rampway. Gail lariats Sienna, who tags Allie and she gets knocked down. Sienna catches Gail and tosses her with a wonky fallaway slam for 2. Crowd chants for Allie. Sienna gets 2 off a corner charge. Sienna gets 2 off of Ryback’s finisher. Jade comes in and kicks away at Sienna. Allie accidentally axehandles Sienna, who pounces her and Jade wins. They’re doing a nice slow buildup for Allie’s official face turn – the fans want it before they’re actually doing it.
JB talks to Billy Corgan and he talks about changing the pro wrestling business forever next. Matt tells his crew that a great battle is coming, and they’re at his zoo to get in touch with his primal instincts. Matt’s animals are all inhabited by the souls of great people – his giraffe is George Washington, and Jeff will spar with a kangaroo inhabited by Smokin’ Joe Frazier. Finally, Matt meets with his spot monkeys – one is DJZ, the other is Everett, Mandrews, and then Matt and Nick the Bucks of Youth. Matt meets with his tiger, who tells him the ENTIRE FLEET OF DECAY ARE COMING.
Now, after the boxing kangaroo, we get a Smashing Pumpkin. Corgan says that the pro wrestling world is ever-changing and the KOTM Title is retired, and the Impact Grand Championship is born. Josh instantly puts this over as some giant ground-breaking thing because…why exactly? So far, he’s just talked about how it is historic and not saying why it is. Drew comes down and says there’s a new title, and the champion sould be six foot five, with 16 years experience who just turned 31.
JB talks about the Grand Championship having three rounds at three minutes apiece in an eight man tournament, and if matches need to, they will be decided by the judges and the first champion will be crowned at BFG. Rex comes out and wants to fight Drew now, while Corgan says their business will be settled at another time and Rex makes his in-ring debut in the tournament, while Drew’s tournament match is next.
Recap of the Grand Championship reveal, before Braxton Sutter comes out to face Drew. There’s a clock in the top-left of the screen and the crowd appears to be less-lit than usual. Josh says the judges are grading based on physicality, aggression, and controlling the action. We see a quick shot of the judges, and aren’t told who they are or why they are qualified to judge the action. Everything about this title reveal is just being rushed horribly. Drew chops his chest to death. Josh talks about how there will be a 10 second warning here like in boxing. Drew gets 2 off a snap suplex and pounds away to close out the first round. Round 1 goes 30-27 in Drew’s favor.
Drew chops away to start round 2. Sutter gets 2 off a superplex. Sutter gets 2 off a powerslam while the announcers talk about how he needs to bring it. 29-28 for Sutter in round 2. Sutter goes for a backdrop and eats a snap piledriver and the Iron Maiden is on and gets the win. Josh talks about fans of TNA being used to seeing action – so the press conference is next. During the break, Rockstar Spud beats up Sutter and bloodies him and we see Rosemary walking down a road before a redneck stops for her. Decay beats him up and steals his truck. Josh hypes up the press conference for the BFG World Title match – but he doesn’t want to overhype it. That was the most uninentionally funny line all show.
Josh brings out Billy Corgan, EC3, and Lashley. Corgan says that Lashley vs. EC3 is the kind of match you will remember in 20 years. EC3 talk about Lashley having way too many dick moves in his arsenal since this title reign began and at BFG, it will end. Lashley talks about how TNA is under fire by other companies and even “those little MMA guys” and as champion, he has to defend not only the title, but the company. EC3 says that isn’t him – he’s the guy you call when you need the ass kicked of the most dominant TNA World Champion ever and he will be an EC3-time champ. Lashley says everyone says the same thing and he’ll do to EC3 what he did to them and leave as champion. EC3 and Lashley go face to face and brawl up the stands, where all the clanking really does sound good. EC3 gets shoved down the steps and that’s it. Well, this was pretty good stuff – nothing amazing, but really good.
Slammiversary DVD ad airs. Recap of the press conference leads to clips of the brawl continuing. Josh says that everyone was frozen in fear to explain why no one did anything. Lashley opens up the sliding door and tries to toss EC3 into the ambulance, but instead tosses him into the dumpster. Jessie talks about how he’ll be able to shine in this Grand Championship Tournament and talks about being the captain of his wrestling team in high school, so he’s used to rounds and he’ll succeed in the tourney. Jessie usually shines when given the sliver of a chance, and that held true here.
Jessie faces Eli Drake, who comes out amid another explanation of the tournament. Josh explains the rules further after the break. Jessie does a mat-heavy match for the first time ever in TNA, dominating with armbars, arm locks, and mat-riding before taking him down and winning the first round 29-28. One judge gave Eli the round – so it’s good to see Cecil Peoples getting a second chance. Eli is more intense here and gets 2 off a slam. Jessie hits a Stinger splash and goes for the Adonis Crab, but Eli avoids it before eventually being locked in – but Eli is saved by the bell. 29-28 once again for Jessie. Godders gets 2 off a sunset flip, and the Crab is on again, but Eli gets to the rope. Josh says that “perhaps Jessie isn’t used to this Impact Grand Championship format”. Well no shit! Eli hitsBlunt Force Trauma and wins it. Josh says this is all fun and then Pope says it’s fun too. Josh hypes up Rex’s debut next week, and Delete or Decay is next! Ad for The Fixer, which is far better than Tyrus wrestling.
The Drew vs. Rex rivalry is run down alongside the Grand Championship reveal. Rex is all pissy at an interview guy and says it took half the locker room to pull them apart tonight. Rex faces Trevor Lee and Shera faces Eddie Edwards. Poor Eddie. Delete or Decay opens with the show-opening video before Senor Benjamin digs graves, is intimidated by Decay, and reveals DELETE on his shovel. Decay comes to the house and Matt says “I KNEW YOU’D COME!
Matt, Jeff, and Reby fire off fireworks guns towards Decay. Matt tells Reby to protect Maxel before DECAY TURNS SCARSGUARD AGAINST THE HARDYS by using it to avoid fireworks. Abyss holds them off and tells his cronies to get to the house. Matt stalks Rosemary while JOSEPH PARK RETURNS AND HUGS SENOR BENJAMIN! Senor Benjamin’s joy buzzer takes him down before a bulldozer whisks him away. Nero suplexes Steve into the pool while Matt stalks Rosemary and Benjamin moves the bulldozer. Jeff puts Steve in a sleeper underwater, but Steve hops up and pulls him down.
Benjamin buries Park, but Abyss pops out of the grave. Steve and Jeff fight out of the pool and then Matt and Rosemary hiss at each other. Abyss uses Janice to subdue Matt, before Nero takes the brunt of Janice and a piano rendition of “Obsolete” plays. Matt is on the run, and only V1 can save him. Vanguard One fires rockets at Decay before fire forms a beautiful Delete or Decay icon. Rosemary grabs Maxel before V1 tells her to put him down. The poison mist takes out V1! She wants Maxel, but gets Matt! Matt swallows the poison mist and burns her. Maxel returns to Matt, but Nero and Benjamin are down and Decay races away. This lacked the finality of Final Deletion, but was quite beautiful at times visually and it’s impressive to see Matt Hardy’s influence changing wrestling in a major way in 2016.
Tags: delete or decay, Matt Hardy