I have been licking women’s asses for more than 30 years.
“W.R.Ã¢â‚¬Â Ã¢â‚¬â€œ Playboy Adviser, Playboy magazine Ã¢â‚¬â€œ November 2002
Just trying to make you feel at home on Monday good morning!
Welcome to The Monday Edition, I’m Flea, once again filling in for Hyatte on a PPV Monday and doing another double shot for the weekend. Did you like the PPV? I haven’t surfed yet for “opinionsÃ¢â‚¬Â of the No Mercy, but I think the show was top notch. Speaking of Hyatte, his stuff is at the bottom. I’m wondering how anyone can say anything bad about him. Do you know he told me that Tony Orlando was on Dave the other night?!?! Now, there is a nice guy, and I ain’t kidding. So don’t call him a cocksucker.
Come on, let’s go
WWE Title Hell in the Cell Match – Brock Lesnar vs. The Undertaker
This would be a Hell In The Cell match and presumably the blow-off between these guys. I’m a little peeved that they would make this the UT’s signature match, seeing as the best angle over the last 2 years was Cactus and his retirement match Ã¢â‚¬â€œ IN THE CELL. But I won’t let that stop me from wondering just how brutal they are going to make this one. An absolute massacre of UT is in order, compete with tons of BLOOD and all the goodies that supposedly go along with a good old fashioned blow off. The issue on Smackdown is that UT CAN wear his cast, which didn’t make all that much sense, seeing as all the cast issue did was make Brock look like a big ole scardy cat. I’m assuming this is going to be used as “psychologyÃ¢â‚¬Â during the match, but I think having the two of them beat the snot out of each other would work just as good. By the way (and I thought they would do this) UT is planned to take some time off so I think that means look for a UT injury angle. Any way you slice it, Brock should be dominant in victory, continuing his reputation as a legend killer.
With all due respect to HBK, this is THE Match of the Year. You can have all the midget technicality and all the flipity flops you want, if you give Flea brutality he is happier as a clam. Fucking BLOOD all over the place and just extreme ass-kickings to from one end of the Cell to the other. Paul E even got into the act and sported the old “crimson maskÃ¢â‚¬Â all the while selling Brock’s doings in the match as if they were life and death themselves. UT just wiped the floor with the punk for the first 15 minutes, culminating in Brock opening a gash on his head and squirting BLOOD all over and Heyman being on the wrong end of a UT ass whuppin. Innovative moves included UT strangling Paul E with his own tie and punching him in the face. With the cast, no less. While Paul E is out bleeding, Brock coldcocks UT with the stairs, opening a hole in UT’s head that SPEWS BLOOD. Now, these Net people say it’s a 1.0 Muta, but I always go to a southern colloquialism, STUCK PIG! UT is just a mess and Brock mauls his casts off him. More intense brawling a highlight being UT giving Brock the Last Ride, then falling backwards on top of Brock for a pin and the BLOOD just gushing all over both competitors. Fucking awesome. Finish came when UT attempted a Tombstone and Brock reversed into a heave Ã¢â‚¬â€œho F5, complete with BLOOD splatting all over the place. Brock celebrates by ascending the cage and standing atop like a King that has slayed another Dragon. Which he has Ã¢â‚¬â€œ Hogan, Rock and now UT. The final was the most brutal and hopefully all the UT detractors will see him for what he is Ã¢â‚¬â€œ a true professional and an expert at his craft. Five Stars, ten Hal Jostsky jokes and a bottle of Crown Royal to the best match of the year and living proof you don’t need someone to fly off the cage like a jackass to keep the Hell in The Cell gimmick alive.
World Heavyweight & WWE Intercontinental Title Unification Match – Triple H vs. Kane
For all of you HHH lambasters Ã¢â‚¬â€œ think about this Ã¢â‚¬â€œ he has SAVED this angle. I think most everyone (except for all the new viewers enthralled with this story) let me rephrase this: everyone on the Internet hates this angle. Maybe some of the people backstage, that has yet to be confirmed. What I do know is this was going down the tubes when Kane was talking, and HHH made the best of a bad situation. Give the guy some credit. H will also make this a decent match, but it ain’t gonna be a classic by any stretch of the imagination. It makes perfect sense for HHH to win here Ã¢â‚¬â€œ if they continue they feud. It will also be marvelous to hear everyone bitch and complain that HHH used all his “powerÃ¢â‚¬Â to “go overÃ¢â‚¬Â. Let me ask you this Ã¢â‚¬â€œ do you think Kane would make a good champion? Me neither. Back to H for a second I mentioned last week that a good feud involves a “faceÃ¢â‚¬Â chasing a “heelÃ¢â‚¬Â. I think everyone is in agreement on that (unless they are blinded by the “HHH EFFECTÃ¢â‚¬Â ha ha ha). I see absolutely no reason for Kane to win here, except to appease the Internet and we all know how good THAT works!
Well, HHH did win in the screwiest circumstances possible, Flair interferes, a few ref bumps and a sledgehammer does the trick. But this was a very good match, good psychology and established HHH once again as a first rate cheater. Which is what you need to be when you are a heel. As far as I know, anyway. But if you put the unfair hatred directed towards H aside, you will find that this match did a perfect job in continuing a feud without Kane being made to look “like a loserÃ¢â‚¬Â. My head hurts just trying to think what the smart crowd is going to say about his match so I’ll just leave well enough alone. I liked it, that’s all that matters.
WWE Tag Team Titles Match – Some Other Guy / Christian vs. Booker T / Goldust
I’m surprised they didn’t throw some kind of goofy stip in her like ladders or a cage, but I guess THE CELL is the only game in town. Should be a solid match by all four guys, Book and Goldust have been doing this team thing for months now and Christian always seems to work better with a partner. He and Some Other Guy is the wild card here as he seems to be the person with the least amount of direction as far as long term plans go. Go ahead and keep the Tag Titles on the bad guys and let them fight amonsgt themselves for another month or two until a singles opportunity opens up. And those are getting fewer and far between it seems. What will kill this match (and the RAW brand in general is the OTHER tag team match, which includes two of the best in the world, a future superstar and a midget who has hound a new lease on showmanship and marketablitly
This match was chugging right along until Some Other Guy had a mishap and broke the middle rope. Before that, all guys kept a quick pace and hit their signature stuff, with Goldust looking exceptionally good tonight. Booker was just Mr Popularity in a state that just recently recognized his type as “reglar folksÃ¢â‚¬Â, so maybe there is something to be said for Vince and his finger being on the pulse of society. When the middle rope broke, all guys improvised in beautiful fashion, the best of which being Some Other Guy doing a MOONSAULT off the top for the pin and the win. He should do that rather than the Lionsault, as the latter of which looks like shit and never seems to work anyway. Another good match but nothing compared to
WWE Smackdown Tag Team Titles Match – Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit vs. Edge & Rey Mysterio
I haven’t looked, but knowing people like I do, everyone is creaming their pants over this one, and for good reason. Angle and Benoit are phenomenal as a team, using the “one up-manshipÃ¢â‚¬Â gimmick in a way that hasn’t been seen since the drinking contest in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Edge has been tremendous over the past few months, while Rey seems to invent new stuff every show. Was he always this entertaining? It’s weird what an upgrade in production values combined with a marketing strategy NOT written in crayon will do for a fellow. I would be remiss not to mention that Benoit was at his best on Smackdown standing there like a POST while people cut promos around him. I think he has found his niche. As opposed to the other tag match, this one needs no gimmick Ã¢â‚¬â€œ what it needs is about 45 minutes sandwiched in between the two ladies matches. That should keep everyone happy.
I don’t know how long it went but this match was stronger than Ajax. Total non stop by all four men, including some new innovations from Rey (something Mexican off of Edge’s shoulders to the floor outside sweet) and a great reversal sequence with Edge and Angle trading AngleLocks until Edge got the worst of it and quit. Perfect ending which will lead to more tag matches between Eddie and Chavo and Edge and Rey and sounds good to me. Gives Angle and Benoit a reason to get pissed off and then beat the shit out of each other at Survivor Series. Let me know when any of this sucks. Better yet, tell GRUT.
WWE Women’s Title Match – Trish Stratus vs. Victoria
This should be a good match between two of the best women wrestlers currently in the company. Backstory is that Trish cheated Victoria out of divadom. Rumor has it there is more to it than that, but I ain’t saying a word, whirly bird. Oh and thanks! Apology accepted wholeheartedly.
Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie
I can’t think of a better eye candy match unless they went back in time and brought back Ms. Elizabeth. The backstory is Dawn Marie is fooling around with old man Wilson and Torrie doesn’t like it. Works for me.
Another good match.
Rob Van Dam vs. Ric Flair
Why do they do this to me? People can complain all they want about “soap operasÃ¢â‚¬Â “lousy story linesÃ¢â‚¬Â “bad bookingÃ¢â‚¬Â “HHH sucksÃ¢â‚¬Â but nothing busts my balls as much as seeing Ric Flair like this. I’ll say this once just to let the cat out of the bag Ã¢â‚¬â€œ RVD sucks. He always has and always will. Sure, he is fun to watch, but he is like a really hot chick who is bad in bed Ã¢â‚¬â€œ all flash and no style. As far an “innovationsÃ¢â‚¬Â, he has been doing the same five moves for the last 6 years. Flair on the other hand, has been doing the same stchick for 20 years, but he has STYLE! Oh f*ck this match is going to suck dog dick. I hate to say that about a Flair match but he is no good around a schmuck like RVD. I’m listening to RVD’s shoot interview from 97 and oh lord he talks like he is the f*cking greatest thing since air conditioning. Meanwhile, while he was doing bong induced bingo hall flip-flop spots, Austin and Cactus were reinventing wrestling. Go figure. Fuck him and f*ck anyone who thinks Flair should be relegated to a punishment like this. Flair has gotten a good match out of everyone, but it ain;t going to happen here. I think I will take the time from this match and go give a pillow a stiff chop and then strut around like I’m Ghengis Fucking Khan. Then I’ll go smoke a bong and try to do a split legged moonsault off the staircase. Then I’ll get up, have a drink and wonder which of those two I could do for the next 30 years. You know what’s scary? Flair really didn’t get good I’ll take that back Flair didn’t really get LEGENDARY until he was almost 40. Think RVD will make it there? Me neither.
Well, this match wasn’t all that bad, I guess. Flair cheating always gets me pumped up but I was in no mood to see this match, so I guess they call that preconceived notions or something similar if not the same. Hey E.C. ? What’s with the Latin? Do you know how hard it is to find a Latin Translator nowadays? S.PA.N.I.S.H! The language of the future, as opposed to a dead language for dead people. You don’t believe, ask Art Martinez, when he ain’t rhyming or smoking pot. Or ask GRUT. Nah, don’t ask him he’s Jewish. There was another Mexican on staff here but I can’t .CARLOS! Over in the 411 FORUM! Yeah, he knows Spanish. RVD needs to stay away from a f*cking microphone
CRUISERWEIGHT MATCH Ã¢â‚¬â€œ Knoble vs. Tajiri
This one stuck up on me. Hell, if they can’t make their minds up by the time I do the Saturday News, then I can’t be bothered to watch or give a relatively coherent description of what happened, much less provide a result. Way to push the Cruisers JR.
So that’s your No Mercy PPV. It takes place in Little Rock, Arkansas where rumor has it that tickets are not selling very well. Estimations say around 5,000 have paid but I think they can add another 3-4,000 to that once showtime rolls around. Even if it isn’t sold out, I would rather hear an enthusiastic hillbilly crowd than a bunch of to smart for there own good Canadian goofballs like I got on Raw. Oh geez, did Hebner REALLY screw Bret? TWWWOOOOOOOOOO! Fucking morons. I’m not to sure how this PPV is going to come across on TV but everyone (meaning all the Internet crowd) is preparing for the worst. But don’t let that influence you decision to purchase the show and enjoy yourself.
Well, the place looked full to me and they were loud and rambunctious all night long. I would suggest ordering the replay as the Brock / UT match is an instant classic and well worth the price of posterity. The whole damn card was good, making this one of these shows that people look back on and say “Wow! That’s wasn’t so bad!Ã¢â‚¬Â, forgetting the words of ill refuse that were heaped on the one and only powerful Wrestling organization’s intentions during this time period.
HAVE YOU HEARD?
Bowing out to the newsline, the next feature is pretty long and I think very interesting. More interesting than me telling you about Mike Awesome, that’s for sure if you enjoy the following half as much as I did, then that means I enjoyed it twice as much as you
IT IS ALMOST TO MUCH TO BEARER
Over on BOB’s premium site there is a marvelous interview with Percy Pringle / Paul Bearer, who was recently released from his WWE contract. The whole interview is promoted as Percy’s FIRST INTERVIEW WITHOUT HAVING TO GET PERMISSION in “over a decadeÃ¢â‚¬Â, so the idea here is to get Percy to spill his guts and hopefully confirm that Vince is an “out of touch powerless old manÃ¢â‚¬Â and HHH is a “menaceÃ¢â‚¬Â. Interview was conducted by Buck and Dave and is a hoot, to say the least .
First of all, Percy’s voice never fails to crack me up. It has for almost 20 years now and still to this day I laugh when he gets all excited and his voice rises to dog whistle octaves. I love that. Unfortunately he gets off on the wrong foot and mentions that he is a big fan of BOB’s site and the premium section (he is a member) which, actually, there is no shame in that. But naturally horns get tooted and egos get inflated with the comment from BOB’s fine staff members “ha ha we know A LOT of people in the business that read but won’t admit itÃ¢â‚¬Â. Yeah, whatever. I don’t remember DDP wearing a 1wrestling T-shirt. (by the way, if you can tell me what website’s shirt Page was wearing I’ll make you famous next week). So ha ha the laugh is on all of us and YOUR site is great. Let’s get on with it
Percy is out of the WWE because his contract expired on 10.14.02. His wife had breast cancer in July of 2001, which at that time Vince and company renewed his contract for another year and allowed him to sit home (with pay) and take care of her. That’s old news and I think it was a top notch thing for Vince and Co. to do (which I mentioned a couple weeks ago), but when renewal time came around again the offer was for Percy to take a pay cut while WWE find something for him “to doÃ¢â‚¬Â. He takes exception to this, but does admit that he no longer has the “passionÃ¢â‚¬Â to perform, due to the changing nature of the business and his own outlook on life in general has changed during his time away from wrestling. It was a mutual agreement “to part waysÃ¢â‚¬Â, so I am wondering why there is an underlying bitterness. Percy goes on to mention how much he enjoyed his “talent developmentÃ¢â‚¬Â duties and he came to the conclusion a while back that is on screen time was “overÃ¢â‚¬Â. He does consider himself “the last of the old school managersÃ¢â‚¬Â, which is a very good point. Tits and Ass ruled the day and on a major level, Bearer was the last of a dying (dead) breed.
Percy “hatesÃ¢â‚¬Â the Brand Extension and had the inside view when Vince bought WCW. The longtime guys saw “impending doomÃ¢â‚¬Â because “paint don’t mix wellÃ¢â‚¬Â, which I don’t get that analogy but I think I know what he means. Percy says lots of folks told Vince it was a dumb idea, which I have always thought is easy to say when you are not the Boss, or a meglomaniac for that matter. Anyone else in Vince’s position would have purchased their competition, especially for the bargain basement price at which he paid for it. Based on his history with WCW, I’m shocked he didn’t kill it that evening instead of waiting all Summer.
Dave brings up the long standing “factÃ¢â‚¬Â that Vince never had any intention of making WCW equal to the WWF and Percy confirms that. Again, this is nothing new or exciting, anyone with have a brain knows that WWF/E is Vince’s baby and why people like Dave and Buck make such an issue about it is beyond me. The fact of the matter was Vince won and he can do what he wants. Besides, the WCW name was long dead before Vince came in and picked the carcass clean.
Percy Ã¢â‚¬â€œ ” He (Vince) had a hard time getting TV for a company called WCW nobody wanted to see it anymore Ã¢â‚¬Â
And everyone knew that, so sayeth The Pringle. He doesn’t act like it’s all that big of a deal except for the fact that when the Brands got “mixedÃ¢â‚¬Â it didn’t work out. Now I know where he was going with the “paint mixÃ¢â‚¬Â analogy a few paragraphs ago. Right on. So far this interview is not divulging the evilness that Buck and Dave are obviously wanting / expecting Ã¢â‚¬â€œ “Geez, that f*cker Wade Keller gets these guys to shoot all over the place, why can’t weÃ¢â‚¬Â. You can almost here their teeth grinding.
Dave goes off about how the Brand Extension is failing and that with “all the top talentÃ¢â‚¬Â going home, it’s an “odd time for “brand extenstionÃ¢â‚¬Â, seeing as he can’t keep one brand afloat, much less two. Percy agrees and then goes into a LENGTHY explanation about how “Vince is the BossÃ¢â‚¬Â and the “final say soÃ¢â‚¬Â etc. , which that fact is only disclosed when convenience and truth outweigh gossip, innuendo and jealousy. All the rest of the time the ills of the company lie in the backstage political doings of H, UT and their ilk.
Percy Ã¢â‚¬â€œ “If he don’t approve it, it don’t go on the airÃ¢â‚¬Â . ” So people can scream and holler and whine and cry all they want to about the writers about how horrible Brian Gerwitz is but if Vince don’t give his seal of approval, it don’t go on the air.Ã¢â‚¬Â
Everyone got that straight now? Good. (“But Flea, they are whispering in his ear and he is an out of touch old man!Ã¢â‚¬Â HHH is a bad influence! Stephanie is spoiled!). Well, believe what you want. Hell, even Buck and Dave do a little revisionist history and yell about how they have been saying “Vince is in chargeÃ¢â‚¬Â and it’s the other creeps on the “net that say those bad things. Oh and by the way
Dave: “Do you think that now that he is 57 years old he is losing touch with what the younger fanbase wants to see?Ã¢â‚¬Â
HA HA HA Way to hedge that bet, Catfish.
Percy: “I have the biggest respect for Vince McMahon and I’m in a position now where I don’t have to kiss anyone’s butt he’s a genius (which then Percy adds an aside “even you guys know thatÃ¢â‚¬Â. More teeth grinding in the background! HA!) Percy: he’s great guy .his whole life is WWE businessÃ¢â‚¬Â. I don’t think this is the “shootÃ¢â‚¬Â these guys were looking for. Not that it will ever be admitted that way, but just an observation.
Dave with more Vince bashing as the failures of the WBF and XFL are mentioned and the question is “Why can’t Vince be happy with only wrestling?Ã¢â‚¬Â
Percy brings up an old quote that Vince uses all the time about “wanting to die with all the toysÃ¢â‚¬Â. Percy says pretty much says he can “do what he want’s, he has all the toys.Ã¢â‚¬Â Dave pretty much says (jokingly?) that wasn’t the answer he was looking for, as it is becoming apparent that Percy is just too nice of a guy to pull and Zenk or Honky. Nevertheless, we continue
Buck tries a different Vince bashing alleged question but Percy goes on and on about how much Vince loves wrestling and wrestling is his life. As this topic ain’t working for the ! BOB gang, we segue into Percy’s past
Yes, he was a real mortician (and still is licensed) when he got into wrestling. He originally was a wrestler, considers himself the “original UndertakerÃ¢â‚¬Â and delves into some funny stories about the past concerning Robert Gibson, Michael Hayes and the World Class territory. Now THIS is what one of these interviews should be about, not all this negativity and spleen venting bullshit. Especially from a storyteller like Percy. I LOVE these old road stories
Percy tells about The Freebirds and their legendary party reputation, which didn’t go over well when they went into the WWF. It’s all going good until Dave twists the whole story about how tough his life is that he has to “write aboutÃ¢â‚¬Â a shitty product and THE GLORY DAYS OF TIME GONE BY all of which Percy no-sells. Good for him. Buck saves thing by segueing into Rick Rude and Fritz Von Erich pulling out of the NWA and doing his own thing in Texas. Percy loves Fritz and really loved Rick Rude and was happy for the opportunity, especially when Brody did the j.o.b. for Rude. Business was good and Percy was happy.
Buck Ã¢â‚¬â€œ (after briefly bringing up the tragedy of Brody and the Von Erichs) “Do you dink World Class .could have made themselves (into) a National promotion?
Percy goes on a heart-wrenching spiel about how many people (especially the Internet) are so disrespectful to people like Kerry Von Erich and “the curseÃ¢â‚¬Â and how HE knew them and the “criticsÃ¢â‚¬Â didn’t and how it just disgusts him to hear bad things about the guys he knew and loved
And AW FUCK! Once again, Dave takes it upon himself to make it all about him and ALSO goes into a little rant about “the netÃ¢â‚¬Â and how out of line people can get. We don’t understand. I can see his interview tactics and how he is attempting to integrate some negativity into the conversation, but it still is not working. Percy “I don’t have time to get into all of this I just thank the Lord, etc.Ã¢â‚¬Â. Good for him. He does manage to get back to another nice story about Rick Rude without interruption. This story MADE the interview and I’m thinking how great other interviews will be if someone will just let Percy talk instead of having an agenda.
Dave gets back on his high horse and turns it back into A STORY ABOUT HIMSELF and how he and BOB are so “misunderstoodÃ¢â‚¬Â somehow comparing Percy’s indictment of web people and their “badÃ¢â‚¬Â stories about Rick Rude into “oh woe is me and woe is BOB, people just say such bad things about usÃ¢â‚¬Â. Hey here is something: When you have someone like Percy Pringle willing to come on your site and talk for an hour, keep your f*cking trap shut. Besides, the world revolves around Bob Ryder, not you. We (meaning the people who are PAYING to hear this interview) don’t care about you (or Buck for that matter) or your f*cking agenda; I want to hear what Percy has to say. And if it doesn’t fit into your mass conspiracy theories about the business (in which you are not even a part of) then find a guest that isn’t as nice a guy as Percy Pringle.
Percy gets into the story about how he became “Paul BearerÃ¢â‚¬Â, a character which he had complete “creative control overÃ¢â‚¬Â due to his background as a mortician. He came up with the “funeral parlorÃ¢â‚¬Â segments as well as his “spooky voiceÃ¢â‚¬Â, which is just funny as hell to hear. Tells a little more about some road stories and the time when he and UT were roped into having to do the “pre-recordedÃ¢â‚¬Â birthday greetings years ago. Again, his imitations here of both UT and his “Paul BearerÃ¢â‚¬Â character are priceless. Buck and Percy are having a good old time talking until
“Do you talk to Mark a lotÃ¢â‚¬Â
HA HA HA HA HA HHA .oh man. To smart for your own good?
Buck and Dave think they are onto something and that Percy is going to spill his guts but Percy has nothing but nice things to say Ã¢â‚¬â€œ they just don’t get to talk to each other all that much anymore. The guys are at least decent enough to “respect his wishesÃ¢â‚¬Â meanwhile, I hear them there teeth grinding again .har.
Percy feels that the UT gimmick played itself out and he didn’t fit into the updated “American BadassÃ¢â‚¬Â gimmick. He also goes into a few stories about Cactus and his stint as the manager of Mankind. Then the get into Vader and then all hell breaks loose
Percy: ” God help you if you are fat in the WWFÃ¢â‚¬Â
Dave: (like a bolt of lightening just shot up his ass, waking him up from his trance when the topics did not revolve around him) : “OH WE KNOW THAT!Ã¢â‚¬Â No shame whatsoever.
Dave tries to wonder where the idea that “you must lose 20 poundsÃ¢â‚¬Â comes from, and Percy politely reminds him that he told him a mere minutes ago that “everything comes from VinceÃ¢â‚¬Â (so pay attention dumbass) and that there was a lot of ribbing on him due to his weight. He mentions losing 100 pounds in eight months and instead of going to a fat farm, he just adjusted his diet. He tells a hilarious story about how “every time he would try to get a piece of Pecan Pie, Vince would walk in and make him feel guilty about gorging himself.Ã¢â‚¬Â But naturally, he looked at it all in jest and eventually started making “fat manÃ¢â‚¬Â jokes about himself. Oops, no great big “conspiracyÃ¢â‚¬Â here either, Dave. Keep trying. Maybe Vince just wants his athletes in shape? The mind boggles and I ponder the evilness behind Vince and his fetish with healthy performers. Booga Booga.
Percy does badmouth the Ross Report as a “report from the Pope in the VaticanÃ¢â‚¬Â which come to find out the reason he is bitter is because Ross didn’t give him a public goodbye in said report. No phone calls from anyone in the company (as of this interview) and some “Woe is meÃ¢â‚¬Â stuff, but I guarantee this rift will not last all that long. Still, nothing all that shocking.
More stories about the past and he gets into the time they had to put Kamala in the casket, (which Kamala called a “casketetÃ¢â‚¬Â) and how he was scared to get in the damn thing. So naturally the “boysÃ¢â‚¬Â NAILED THE LID SHUT ON HIM! Ha ha ha! However, Percy didn’t find that too funny and Dave gets very sanctimonious about the evilness of anything resembling “hazingÃ¢â‚¬Â. Another good story shot to hell.
Some stuff here about the Kane angle which are not much but Dave’s bullshit opinion and ravings. Percy does mention that he thinks that Kane is “too nice a guy to have to be involved in an angle like thisÃ¢â‚¬Â but “won’t say anythingÃ¢â‚¬Â. Dave, of course has heard the same thing off the record. Whatever. In Mick Foley’s book “Have a Nice DayÃ¢â‚¬Â he describes the whole “Montreal IncidentÃ¢â‚¬Â and how he (Foley) was ready to walk out, but Kane refused, having found a “bankable gimmickÃ¢â‚¬Â. Five years later, same thing. I don’t need a gossip monger to tell me the guys demeanor. Besides, not everyone is in Austin (or Foley’s) position to just get up and walk away whenever they damn well feel like it. Dave just rambles about the stupidity of the whole thing. This, having been beat into the ground, the interview has taken a turn for the worse as Buck and Dave are tired about hearing about happy road stories and want some dirt
Buck brings up the UT comic. Percy has nothing to say about it because he doesn’t really know. The keep going with this but Percy “doesn’t knowÃ¢â‚¬Â. Onto the HHH subject Ã¢â‚¬â€œ
Ha ha ha! Percy has been off the road for a year in a half but the HHH he knows “is a first class guyÃ¢â‚¬Â. I have determined that anytime Dave (or Buck) says “you’ve got to respect thatÃ¢â‚¬Â means that it damn sure wasn’t the answer they were looking for. And oh the teeth are grinding again, as they are realizing the tiger they had by the tail for this interview is just a big ole kitten who won’t say a damn thing bad about anyone. Irony is great sometimes, do you think?
Moving along to Austin and once again, Percy wasn’t around so he doesn’t know the details. He does think that Austin will come back, just for the “love of the businessÃ¢â‚¬Â.
On the topic of whether or not he will be back Ã¢â‚¬â€œ “most definitely, in one form or anotherÃ¢â‚¬Â. Percy talks a little more about his wife and gives a nice little PSA about Breast Cancer and the need to check for it. Good for him as you can tell in his voice the sincerity and the goodness in his heart that he means it. He also is grateful to Vince for letting the contract continue so that he could get paid for staying home. That wraps it up, Percy was great.
I doubt that they will ever admit to it, but I think Dave and Buck went into this with a lot “higherÃ¢â‚¬Â expectations, seeing as this was Percy’s first “off the recordÃ¢â‚¬Â interview. What they got was a nice guy who has a penchant for storytelling and a voice that, although it makes me laugh, will transfix you when he is given the time to let a story unfold. Unfortunately, the interviewers (well one of them anyway; Buck did a fine job, even marking out several times) try to get themselves over seeing as the content being disclosed to them was “just not controversialÃ¢â‚¬Â enough. That’s a shame because Percy Pringle / Paul Bearer is interesting enough without having to dig through dirt or garbage for entertainment purposes. If you want that crap, listen to Joey Styles. Same site and same amount of money.
Good luck to Percy and I look forward to hearing his next interview. At another site, preferably.
ANOTHER WEEK OF THIS CRAP
RAW is in Nashville, TN and Smackdown will be in Memphis, TN, completing the last few days of good location for all the nice people in the WWE. Looking at the schedule, some people are going to have to go to Finland and Ireland, while some others are going to Tokeka, Kansas. It’s up to you where you think would be the least appealing to go, I’ll just ponder why in the world I will have to be relegated to Lawler two nights this week.
THE LINKS ARE ON ME
They stuck a Rasslin Roundtable in on me and Vanderhost has a few things to say as well. Heat, Velocity and Confidential are available. Don’t forget Music and Games and Movies and the Forum and the list goes on and on
Also check out .whoa! The sniper left a phone number! 202 867-5309!
Hope Jenny changed her number! Who needs Patterson jokes! OH HYATTE! Please tell us about the time Remy did some creative editing!
Also check out ME! The Saturday Matinee is their as well as some EXCESS archives!
OK, thanks for hanging in there for a couple of days with me. Lookout for ERIC S. tomorrow and The Man Who Knew Too Much, GRUT next week until then here is your fix
Quick Note Ã¢â‚¬â€œ I found THE BREADLESS HORSEMAN extremely funny, but humor is not my cup of tea, so I hear
THE PARANOID HOOLIGAN
Not sure if you noticed… actually, I know you did ’cause I told you about it.
The following is about me:
Nutbag? Eat Shit and Die, You Asshammer
First, you are an emotionally stunted f*ckwit. I’m so sorry someone broke your heart TWELVE years ago, why don’t you take your own advice and get over it? After all, I’m sure your personality had nothing to do with it at all. [rolls eyes until the whites are showing]
Second, I will swear on all I hold holy that I had ZERO interest in you at first, Mr “So do you love me yet”?
Third, you mocked one of my best friends. News flash, ass, he’s ten times the man you could ever be.
Fourth, “planning revenge”? You are not worth the time. Letting you live with yourself is better revenge than I could ever plan. Go “cry like a prison bitch” some more.
Fifth, I faked every f*cking time.
Sixth, you will “humiliate me”? Pfft. One word and I send out those AIM logs I saved. Yes, I saved THOSE. The ones that prove you a liar? I have them. I figure they’re my insurance policy.
I told the mark the truth. Set us both free, if you will. He’s on to you, but who isn’t?
In conclusion, I’d like to point out your other faults, but I just don’t have the time. You’re dead to me.
Five days ago, this gal was seducing web guys for me.
Fun stuff like this is what makes life worth living sometimes!
Why are you here Flea? Didn’t you retire last week?
* * * * *
No, I didn’t retire that ain’t until 12.1.02.
Thanks for reading THE MONDAY EDITION, I’m Flea.