InsidePULSE’s WWE Raw Report 08.02.04
Live from Cleveland
Announcers are JR & The King
Report done *EXCLUSIVELY* for InsidePULSE by PK
Welcome to the new InsidePULSE. I know many of you know me from 411mania, and you know that my RAW Report is plain and simple. If Orton nails an RKO, I will tell you. If Hurricane hits a shinning wizard, I will tell you. I will not make jokes, I will not give matches ratings, and I will not give my personal view on the show, for the most part. As of right now, the only exception to the rule is the HORRIBLE Diva Contest, don’t expect too much from that.
With that out of the way”¦
Intro”¦Matt/KANE/Lita contract signing, and Eugene/Benoit vs. Orton/HHH tonight
Coach in the ring, and he goes to eliminate one of the Diva’s, but Randy Orton comes down, and he does the honors to eliminate Chandra.
Orton then continues to run down Benoit, and says that he has Benoit’s number, and shows the clips of Orton nailing the RKO on Benoit last week. Orton calls it destiny that he will win, and become the youngest World Champion, at the age of 24. This brings out Benoit, and he says that since we are showing footage, we can show the clips of Benoit making Orton tap out. Orton realizes that Benoit has never done that, and gets in his face about it. Benoit then grabs Orton’s arm, and locks the Crossface on, and makes him tap out. They then replay that footage. HAHA.
Stacy, Victoria & Nidia vs. Molly, Gail & Jazz
Molly and Victoria start, they go back and forth with tie-ups. Victoria runs rampant, but Molly ducks a clothesline, and takes out Victoria. Gail in, Victoria up quick, headlock on Gail, Stacy in. Gail tosses Stacy to the outside, and distracts the ref while Molly attacks Stacy. Molly rolls Stacy back in, and Gail gets a 2 count. Jazz in, distracts the ref and Victoria while Gail and Molly double team Stacy. Molly in, whips Jazz at Stacy, but Stacy puts her boot up. Molly comes at Stacy with a clothesline, and then takes out Nidia and Victoria. Stacy with a roundhouse, Nidia in, and a melee ensues. Molly goes roughshot on Nidia, nails a nasty looking swinging neckbreaker. Molly is distracted with Victoria, then Nidia comes out of nowhere, and rolls up Molly for the pin.
Winners ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬” Nidia/Stacy/Victoria
Trish comes out, and talks to all 6 diva’s off mic, and they all walk out together.
Recap of Regal/HHH from last week.
Commercials. SummerSlam commercial of HHH doing the Hammer Throw, and spitting water to extinguish the Olympic flame.
In a hotel, Regal and Eugene are talking. Regal is planning on staying at the hotel until right before Eugene’s match tonight. Regal is in pretty bad shape. Regal sits Eugene down and tells him to watch TV, then walks away. Eugene then sneaks out of the room.
Cena defeats RVD, and will face Booker in a best of 5 series
Angle defeats Haas in his return match
Spike turns heel on Mysterio
JBL brings out a mini-UT, and the real UT comes out. UT goes to Tombstone JBL, but Orlando Jordan saves the day for JBL
Lita is sitting in a room alone, and Mattitude comes in. Lita reveals that they did a DNA test on the baby, and it didn’t match Matt’s, so the baby is KANE’s.
JR in ring for the contract signing. KANE comes out, apparently, JR is no longer afraid of being in the same ring with KANE. Mattitude and Lita comes out. KANE is laughing it up. JR goes over the stipulation. If Matt wins, KANE will forego any brutality to Matt and Lita, and Matt and Lita can marry if they choose. If KANE wins, Lita has to marry him. Lita signs, KANE signs, and Matt stalls for a bit, and finally signs the contract. KANE then taunts Mattitude, and Matt takes the metal briefcase the lawyer had and drills KANE over the head. Matt is fired up, and KANE sits up.
The Diva contestants try to sell us an ice cream cone”¦so, so bad. Has anyone actually voted for this?
Slam of the Week ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬” Edge and Jericho’s scrapple last week.
Edge vs. Chris Jericho
Non-Title match. Tie-ups to start, Jericho starts to work on Edge’s shoulder. They fire chops back and forth, then Edge pins Jericho to the corner, and nails 9 out of the 10 punches, but Jericho takes him down, and goes for a splash, but Edge puts his knees up. Back to a stalemate, and this seems to be a very slow paced match. Edge in the corner, Jericho charges, Edge dodges, Edge with a roll up for 2, Jericho with a running forearm, Edge to the outside. Edge is on the apron, and Jericho goes for his springboard dropkick, but Edge ducks it, and Jericho falls all the way to the outside. Jericho attempts to get up on the apron, but Edge nails a spear, and Jericho flies back to the wall.
Back at it, Edge had a neck wrench applied. Jericho fights his way up, gets out, hits the ropes, then hits Edge’s knee. Edge goes to the top, he flies off the turnbuckle, but Jericho nails a dropkick on Edge’s way down. They both get up, then go toe to toe. Edge sends Jericho off the ropes, Jericho reverses it, and nails a leg lariat. Jericho then dropkicks Edge, and is draped over the 2nd rope, and then nails a running ass splash. Jericho off the ropes again, goes for a bulldog, but Edge dodges it, and nails a big boot for 2. They fight back and forth again, Jericho lines up for a spear, but Edge puts his knee up, then goes for the Walls, but Jericho wont let it happen, so Edge catapults Jericho into the turnbuckle, then nails the Edge-o-Matic for 2. Edge goes for a dropkick, but Jericho slaps it away, and goes for the Lionsault, but Edge gets the knees up. Edge goes for a spear, but Jericho gets out of the ring, only for Edge to baseball slide right into him. Edge goes out, and sends Jericho back in the ring. Edge goes to the top, but Jericho crotches him, and goes for a SUPERPLEX. Edge counters, and drops Jericho face first on the mat. Edge then with a missile dropkick for 2. Edge goes for a side headlock, but Jericho fights out, goes to lock on the Walls, Edge then rolls him up for 2. Edge off the ropes, but Jericho with a grabbing neckbreaker for 2. Jericho goes for a bulldog, but Edge grabs him and guides him, crotch first, into the turnbuckle. Edge goes for a spear, Jericho leapfrogs it, Edge goes shoulder first into the turnbuckle, and Jericho rolls him up, and used the ropes for the pinfall.
Winner ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬” Jericho
Batista runs out and nails 2 huge spinebusters, and the big clothesline on Edge, while Jericho just watches from the outside.
Eugene arrives at the arena.
Eugene comes out to the ring. He is yelling for HHH, but he doesn’t have a mic. He finally gets one and he wants HHH to come out because he hurt Regal. HHH appears on the tron, and tells Eugene that he is mad at the wrong guy. He should be mad at himself. HHH tells him that he doesn’t belong, but he came back, and cost HHH the World Title. He said that he sent a message through Regal with a sledgehammer. He said that maybe he needs to be a little more clear. He then tells Eugene that he didn’t listen to Regal when he told Eugene to stay put at the hotel, but he is in the ring, calling out HHH, whereas HHH is in his hotel room, and he has taken out Regal again. HHH says that at SummerSlam, he will personally make sure that Eugene gets out of the business. Eugene runs up the ramp crying, it looks like he might be headed back to the hotel.
Rhyno & Tajiri vs. Rick Albright & Chris Cage ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬” 2 Minute Challenge
If R&T defeat the jobbers in less the 2 minutes, they get a title match at SS. La Rez comes out right at the bell. Rhyno hits the GORE GORE GORE with 15 seconds remaining, but La Rez distracts the ref, and he doesn’t make the pinfall.
Vote for your favorite Diva.
Commercials. SummerSlam Commercial with Eddie gluing the runners feet to their starting blocks. Best one yet.
Diva’s in bikini’s and the voting is open now. All the WWE Diva’s from the first match come out and get in the ring. Oddly enough, it’s 7 on 7. Trish said that she had an idea for SummerSlam, and the actual Diva’s will take on the RAW Diva contestants in a game of Dodgeball. HAHA.
Cole and Tazz join us for the SS Card
Booker T vs. John Cena (First out of Five Matches)
Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle
Dudley Boyz vs. Rey Mysterio, Paul London, & Billy Kidman
JBL vs. Undertaker (WWE Title)
Chris Benoit vs. Randy Orton (World Title)
Edge vs. Batista vs. Chris Jericho (IC Title)
Matt Hardy vs. KANE (Death Do Us Part Match)
Triple H vs. Eugene
HHH is back in the arena, and his taped up hands are a bloody mess. He says that Eugene got the message, and Orton says that if not, Regal got it for sure. HHH says that Benoit is next, and they walk towards the ring with Flair.
Randy Orton & Triple H (w/ Ric Flair) vs. Chris Benoit & Eugene
Benoit tells us that Eugene went back to the hotel, so this is now a handicap match. Benoit says that it doesn’t matter to the Wolverine. Benoit runs wild on both members of Evo. He hits the Trifecta of German early on HHH. Orton on the apron, but Benoit takes him down. Benoit goes up for the Swandive, but Flair distracts him, and HHH crotches him. HHH tags in Orton. Orton goes nuts on Benoit, slugging away, HHH back in. HHH stomps away on Benoit in the corner. Orton back in, more punching and kicking, HHH back in. HHH with a knee, gets 2. HHH puts Benoit into Evo’s corner, but Benoit starts to fight back, only for Orton to get involved. Orton tagged in, Orton locks on the rear chin lock. HHH back in, Benoit fires up, and they go toe to toe. HHH sends Benoit off the ropes, then nails a HUGE Spinebuster for 2. Benoit rolls to the outside, Orton and HHH distracts the ref, and Flair beats down Benoit a bit. Orton tagged in, sends Benoit to the ropes, but Benoit puts the brakes on, and rolls up Orton for 2. Orton up first, goes to the top, but Benoit crotches him. HHH runs in, Benoit gives him a German. Benoit gets up the turnbuckle, and gives Orton a SUPERPLEX. All 3 men are down. HHH and Benoit up first, HHH off the ropes, Benoit with a back body drop, then a back suplex. Benoit then chops away on Orton, but HHH gets to Benoit, and goes for a Pedigree, only for Benoit to back body drop HHH to the outside. Benoit locks the Sharpshooter on Orton, but Flair distracts him, and Benoit lets go. Benoit then KO’s Flair, and locks the Crossface on Orton. As soon as Orton is about to tap, Flair comes in and causes the DQ.
Winner via DQ ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šÂ¬” Benoit
Benoit fights off Flair and Orton, but HHH hits the Pedigree. Eugene then comes running down, and attacks HHH. HHH leaves quickly, and he takes turns using Flair and Orton as punching bags to end the show.