Welcome to the debut of Bob’s Amazing Thoughts column here at Inside Pulse. I wanted to take a second to explain the basic format of this column, being that it is slightly different from some. The concept is relatively simple, this is not a recap or a review, although it may contain certain elements of both. Basically, what I do is sit down right after the initial airing of The Amazing Race and write up my basic thoughts, hopefully in an enjoyable manner. These thoughts are always gut reactions. I do not read anyone else’s opinion nor do I check out insider video’s before writing these. Each week I pick a winner and a weasel based on their actions in that particular week, plus a line or exchange that stands out. I then give my final thoughts on the Philiminated team. After that I will tackle the various happenings during that leg of the race and my perceptions of them. I have been writing some version of this format for the past two seasons.
So be warned. If you haven’t watched the show, you won’t get much out of this column. This should be looked at as a compliment to the show, and not a true recaps of the events. So let’s begin…
Often, when the material presents itself, I like to put a little spin on the format. This week, due to such a plethora of great material I am going to be using some of the racers own words to introduce my various thoughts this week. Quite frankly, some times they just say it better than I ever could. So with that being said here are my thoughts on this past week’s episode….
1. Winners of the Week: “We did it right this time.” I haven’t been a big fan of our matronly ball and pin divas Linda and Karen. I never really like the team theme, cutsey, wutsey matching shirts thing. I don’t care if you’re a gutsy grandma or what your weird looking little dog’s name is, just run the damn race. Yet, for the first time since the race has begun I found the “bowling moms” somewhat interesting. They ran the race hard and fast, with very little whining this time. To be honest, I thought they would have been gone a while ago. I was impressed with their focus and attitude this week, even when they thought they were in last place.
2. Weasels of the Week: “I hate this kind of thing.” “Yeah, but I want a million dollars” Brandon, no matter how pretty she looks in her little modeling pictures, you’re not racing with a China doll here. While, I guess, it’s nice that your concerned about Nicole’s head bouncing off the rocks, for some reason I get the feeling that it was you who were intimidated by the whole sledging thing and you’re just playing “manly protective guy” to cover up your own fears. If not, then you just greatly underestimate your girlfriend, who seemed more than willing to take the chance. Either way, it’s all weasely. Yet, even if God answered your prayers and lead you right to the clue, you should have realized it was going to be tough. I mean, it was called, “Hell’s Gate.” For a good Christian boy, that should have been a big clue.
3. “Wouldn’t it be funny if we were going in the wrong direction again?” Yep, hilarious. I admit it, these twins just creep me out. They’re just two crazy eyed Chucky dolls with blonde hair. I must now carefully say good-bye to Kami and Karli.. It took me this long and I never really found out which one was the actual evil twin, but my money was on both of them. For the life of me, I just don’t get why you would choose to go to the mud puddle, than the much faster sledging route. Well, we’ll let the twins explain it, “I’d rather be in hot mud than in cold water right now.” Translation: We better keep our skin nice and fresh looking to maintain our cute features, because no way in hell are we going to win this million dollars.”
4. Line of the Week: Oh, there were so many. The material was great this week. I think the most amusing little line of the whole show was Linda’s “They are screwing the helmet to my head … This can’t be good.” It seemed to have just the right balance of humorous whining and plucky determination that highlighted the bowling mom’s performance this week.
5. “Ummm…are you the least bit excited about white water sledging?” It seems that ever since Egypt, there has to be a quota of at least one “Bad Colin” moment in each show, and here he gets annoyed with Christie when she told him he was going the wrong way, then when he realizes he was wrong, clumsily tries to change the subject. Yet, this was only a slight bump in the road in another well run and entertaining leg. I said it earlier, and I still believe it, Colin may be the best racer of all time. Yes, he’s a time bomb waiting to explode, again, but he does have skills. Colin was everything a good racer should be on this leg, smart, decisive and excited about the adventure and if he could control his temper, he would easily become one of my all time favorites.
6. “It may have been the stupidest thing I’ve done in my whole life.” I don’t know about his whole life, but in the game, it was pretty dumb. Yielding the twins should have been a no brainer. Both teams have been in the race long enough to know that you never assume you know where the other teams are. It’s getting down to the final legs and any chance at separation should be grabbed. Chip, while running a good race, now needs to run his own race, not worrying about entertaining the other teams, he doesn’t need to make friends or be the “jokester.”
7. “I’m gonna back hand you boy, you won’t be able to model again in this town.” After a week where she showed off ability to say to incredibly goofy things, Nicole was pretty funny this week. Her little Pre-K/Kindergarden exchange with Brandon, was the kind of sugary sweet, I love you more, sort of interplay we’ve seen before but with a little more wit and dark humor. She seems to becoming the comedian to Brandon’s straightman. I specifically found it humorous after finding the clue that Brandon was so desperately praying for she said, “Thank God…. literally.”
8. “I just lied.” So we are down to our final four, and the most unique final four of all time, in my opinion. While I think this may be one of the weakest group of technical racers we’ve had in this show, it’s been one of the most entertaining. I mean, seriously, did the twins actually think that the “reservation” ploy would work. Did they think the ticket agent would have said, “Oh, you had reservations. Well we must have screwed up. We don’t have any seats left, but you can sit in the aisles if you want.” Yet, it was amusing. The teams that seem the most physically threatening, one seems always on the verge of a breakdown and the other seems unwilling to take a risk. So right now it’s anyone’s game, and that’s how it should be.
Well, that’s all for this week. If this is your first time reading this column and would like to check out my thoughts on past episodes you can check out my blog at http://journals.aol.com/breiss319/BobsThoughts/