I’m rather fortunate to own two TVs one on top of the other, as it gives me the chance to watch the Emmy’s as I do this week’s review. Now if only I could get a decent V.C.R.. Just a quick live Emmy thought before I review this weeks episode-
I am absolutely furious at what they did to Jeffrey Wright, who was giving a stirring speech on the devastation of the AIDs virus and its effect on Africa. They started blaring the loud music as he was talking. I find this to be absolutely tasteless, but reflective of the general consensus on the issue. That’s enough of that. You know what your here for-
The Surreal Life Episode 3- “Battle of the Bands”
Sundays at 10:00 P.M. on Vh-1
Previously on the Surreal Life- Don’t trust the people who made the show to tell you what happened, just read my review!!
Intro- Same as it ever was.
We start off in the morning at 8:57 A.M. Everyone is sleeping except Dave. He wakes up Flav, who wakes up Charo. He looks at her in her robe and asks “got milk”. It takes her a minute to get the joke, but once she does, she immediately crosses her arms over her “timbales”.
Flav visits with Briggite and they lie down together. Briggite is wearing a zip-up sweater. That’s certainly a change.
Ryan picks up the Surreal times at the front door. Once again it’s EVENT TIME!! This week’s event puts our housemates in a battle of the bands. Three teams of two, competing against each other. Whoever wins gets a thousand dollars for their favorite charity. Brigitte is worried about the event since she doesn’t sing or perform. What about the first episodes fun fact about her touring as ‘Gitte’?
Each team has to choose from one of these three songs- Born To Be Wild, Wild Thing, and that timeless classic, White Cherry’s Play That Funky Music, White Boy.
And the teams are-
Flava and Jordan
Dave and Brigitte
Ryan and Charo
Nine musicians will be available, and each team must add three a piece for their band. Whoever wins the battle gets 1,000 for their favorite charity.
Ryan wants to do Born to be Wild. Charo doesn’t want to do it. She wants to do a song called “Mississipi Sisters” despite the fact that it would break the rules of the contest and basic decency. They start singing, and they show Charo’s dog sadly looking at the camera, more embarrassed than I am, if that’s possible
Dave and Brigitte are going to do Wild Thing. Brigitte is in a cheetah print one piece bathing suit. Thatâ??s more like it.
The musicians are knocking at the door. Who are they? Come back and find out!
First Commercial Break
The bandmates come in, and their all….Kids!! It’s School of Rock 2!!
The teams now choose their musicians. Everyone is picked except the accordion player Rosie. Poor girl. Learn to write song parodies, or get a new instrument. The ever-charitable Flav picks her when no one else will. I was always picked last. And now I’m here. Umm, moving right along…
Ryan and Charo gather up their musicians and begin playing Charo agrees to learn Born To Be Wild because of her love for kids and music. Their musicians are a drummer, guitarist, and a singer. Charo goes all wacky on a speedy acoustic guitar solo. You rock it Charo!!
Flav is ready to play that funky music. He’s got a trumpeter, Rosathe accordionist, and a guitarist. Flav is on drums, and has a giant digital clock around his next this week. The musicians jam out, and Flav brings the kids in for a lunch break, where Brigitte happens to be. She mentions in confessional how big Flav’s heart is. He is good with those kids.
Brigitte and Dave try to conduct a drummer, a saxophonist, and bassist in Wild Thing. Dave’s really into the dad role of being band leader and doesn’t approve of Brigitte’s revealing swimsuit. As they’re practicing Brigitte disappears, and Dave is angered by Brigitte’s sudden urge to take a nap, with only so much time to get organized. The shows going to start in a few hours.Or five minutes. After these messages naturally.
Second Commercial Break
Ten minutes to showtime. Or ten seconds. Gotta love that TV magic!
Everyone’s rushing to get together. The show starts with our host Barry Williams!!!! Awesome. If he couldn’t be in the house, it’s at least cool he was on the show in some capacity.
First up is the Surreal Deal. Brigitte is wearing a green wig and glasses. They do okay. Just okay.
Next is Ryan Starr and the Madison Ave. Rockers- Drummer vocalist, and guitarist. They might as well call this born to be cacophonous. It’s all over the place.
Finally we have King Kold Cuts and the Bolognas. Notice how they didn’t change the spelling in “Cuts”? Would’ve been interesting- Rosa’s rocking out on the Accordion. Jordan thinks she’s really funky. Flava’s in a wig and goggles. Easily the best performance of the three, which makes sense considering that they’re both musicians.
It’s voting time, and things are judged by a scream meter. King Cold Cuts and the Bologna’s wins. Everyone’s still screaming, and Barry Williams falls in a pool. Gotta love that guy.
Jordan enjoyed playing with kids. Jordan and Flav give cheers and thank each either for a good job and we end the episode on a light note.
A very fast-moving, enjoyable episode. Flav still hogged all the screen time, unsurprisingly it worked this time. I could see him hosting his own kids show. Of course he’d be spending more time with the child actors than his own children, but that’s neither here nor there.
