Ok…let me just get this out of the way and move on to other
pressing matters. Over at The Wrestling Blog we saw just how
far Tammy/Sunny has fallen. She looks like Cloudy now. So here,
in pictures, is Tammy’s career:
NAUGHTY NAUGHTY!
And now, my dear readers, the most downloaded celebrity on AOL at one point: SUNNY!
Yea, I didn’t know if that was Scott Hall either.
Now, some of you may have wondered about the picture at the top of your screen. Why do I have a
picture of Triple H and Stephanie? Is it because I want to break this one out?
No, its not that. But that is funny. It’s because I want to break this out: That’s right: Mini
Steph on The Crucifix! Blatt had his wrestling appreciation month. Now I will have my Stephanie
appreciation for the foreseeable future. Every now and then I’m just going to throw mini Steph in my
column so that we all know the driving force behind what we are seeing and enjoying. So SMILE!
Steph is with you! On with the show…
Raw 11.22.04
-Monday Night Football spoof that was hilarious. And it got some press too. Daily News in New York
-Chris Benoit is running the show this week. He announces Maven vs. Snitsky, Batista vs. Jericho,
Lita vs. Trish vs. Molly for the Women’s Championship, and puts himself in a cage match vs. Triple H
for the World Title.
-Gene Snitsky def. Maven with The Mourning After Slam
-HHH is pissed about last week and is even more pissed about being in a cage with Benoit. Batista
claims he’ll watch out for HHH, but Trips is none too happy with Batista for not protecting him last week.
Batista has a match with Jericho and can’t be bothered with the bullsnit HHH is spewing. Trips bets
$100 that Batista loses to Jericho.
-Stacy shills the ECW DVD. Simon Dean comes out and harasses her. Hurricane and Rosey make the
save.
-Some ladies backstage talk about hearing Triple H and Batista argue. Flair and Dave walk by, with
Batista saying HHH should back off.
-Chris Jericho def. Batista via DQ when Batista wouldn’t release The Tree Of Woe neck pull.
-Batista and Flair happen to run into Triple H backstage. HHH mocks Batista, saying he owes him $100.
Flair tells HHH to back off.
-Edge promo. He thinks he should be champion and stuff.
-Coach awaits JR. Benoit thought JR stood for Just Rhyno.
-Rhyno def. Coach
-Trish Stratus def. Lita and Molly by pinning Molly after Lita hit The Basinet DDT.
-Flair tells Batista that Triple H is just stressed from the loss at Survivor Series and all that and he
wants Batista to apologize.
-Shelton Benjamin took a gun to school once and he got expelled.
-Shelton Benjamin, Eugene and William Regal def. Christian and La Resistance.
-Muhammed Hassan in an airport. Seems he has a wee bit of trouble boarding a plane.
-Benoit hits the ring awaiting Triple H. Cut to the back and Triple H is down! Medics rush in
and so does Benoit. He wants Triple H’s carcass brought to the ring. A doctor (SMASHING WEATHER, SMASHING BEACHES?) tells him Triple H won’t compete. Edge makes fun of Benoit and GM Benoit
gives Edge a cage match against him…RIGHT NOW.
-Chris Benoit def. Edge when Edge speared Benoit through the cage door. DOH!
-Flair tells Batista that Triple H is pissed for the assault and he should run. DAVE tells him to tell HHH
to get in the ring. He also tells Flair to choose a side.
-HHH and Batista go nose to super nose in the ring. Triple H says he has one thing to say: “Good
going man!” They share a laugh and Triple H tells us it was so easy. Fake an argument, hire
a fake doctor , and now celebrate. But next weeks GM Randy Orton comes out and gives
Triple H two choices: Face him one on one with the stipulation where Orton can’t fight HHH for the title
on the line or…Triple H says no to number 1. So it’s DOOR NUMBER TWO and Triple H will defend the
title against all of Raw next week in a 30 man Battle Royal.
The Raw Membrane
Legally:
-Triple H betting $100 dollars on a Batista loss is illegal gambling. Gambling is illegal in New York.
-Simon Dean is guilty of verbal harassment with Stacy.
-Shelton Benjamin is guilty of weapons possession and possession with the intent to harm.
-Muhammed Hassan is guilty of being Arab in America.
-Triple H is guilty of intentionally breaching his contract to avoid competition.
-Batista is guilty of coercion with the intent to breach contract, as is Ric Flair.
-The “Doctor” is guilty of falsely practicing medicine and violating several HIPPA (These are medical confidentiality laws) standards.
Personally:
-The Monday Night Football spoof was awesome. Shelton can act too!
-I’m considering renaming Snitsky’s Mourning After Slam to the Scott Peterson Slam…what do you
guys think?
-Why is Simon Dean harassing Stacy? She’s like AN pound.
-Good show of Batista’s psycho streak with the Jericho match.
-The Batista/Triple H segments were done well. Had me tricked for a little bit.
-What kind of Canadian does Benoit speak? How could JR mean “Just Rhyno” Was he thinking about
who was left in ECW before it died?
-Lita is still looking hot! Trish too! And Mol…Nah I’m just f*cking with you.
-The only reason they are bringing up Shelton Benjamin’s criminal past is because he’s black. Can’t
you just get someone over on his or her talent?
-Eugene is retarded. They should hire Tammy/Sunny and have her manage him. It could be like a new
Oddities.
-Muhammed Hassan…in an airport…ok let me rant…Sorry Muhammed/Shaun, but when it comes down
to it, it was 19 Muslims on 9/11. So if you think us American’s are just a little wary, you’re spot on.
Now I read on your website that these are things that happen to you on a daily basis. I’m sorry it
happens, but I’m pissed 9/11 happened. I know you didn’t do it, but unfortunately you happen to look a
lot like some of the guys that did. Sucks, but it’s true. I’d have a beer with you anytime and tell
you straight up I know it sucks and sorry, but it’s something that people will be very defensive of for a
long time. Besides…I’m Cuban and Irish…small penis jokes have hounded me my entire life.
-The only person who didn’t know Triple H wasn’t really hurt was Eugene.
-When Triple H said “Ya pay off a doctor” one thing popped in my head: Learn from the best
baby!
-I don’t really get the logic of a 30 man Battle Royal for the title. Orton could’ve just been crazy and
made Triple H run the gauntlet and try to get through Benoit, Jericho, Maven, Batista, Flair and
Snitsky. If he loses, then the stipulation would be lifted. But ok…have a battle royal.
Sorry folks but I missed Smackdown (Capital letter hereby reinstated) because of Turkey Day so I can’t
say much about it. Gordi stepped up huge doing the recap though.
I want to do something special with some pictures this week. So consider this…
Hevia’s Pictoral Opinions:
NWA:TNA: do you really think you’re going to get anywhere by bringing in Randy Savage to fight Jarrett
and THESE TWO?
He’s oozing with something
Big Sexy?
Now to Kane. I admire Glenn Jacobs for the character transformation he has gone through with the Lita
angle. But remember when he was a mere child?
What about when he pulled Jerry Lawler’s cavities?
How about when he was Kevin Nash’s replacement?
Through all that laid the man we know now as Kane. First a masked beast:
Then apparently void of a respectable haircut and with some shoe polish in the wrong place:
Now that is character progression. Some of Glenn Jacobs best moments have been recently. When
he gets back from shooting that movie, I expect him to turn it up a notch and really go crazy on
Snitsky.
He should be careful though…too many makeovers and you wind up like this:
What was The Rock thinking?
Speaking of The Rock, anybody want him back as bad as I do? Almost all of the few times I mark out
per year are for his appearances. COME BACK ROCK! Even with your Hawaiian thingie!
Maybe Steph will get him back.
Time to plug some people:
PK blew his load last week with his figures column, so this week is short. But never fear, because PK
and his Raw Report is load enough for Inside Pulse’s wrestling zone!
Katie returns and it seems the MTV’s new Battle Of The Sexes is heating up!
Evanescence came out with a DVD/CD set on Tuesday which you can buy here .
I never get pimped by Sculzewski so maybe I’ll start a trend by PIMPING HIM
Biscuiti has arrived with some Counterfeit Pennies
Goforth returns to the zone with Heroes and Villians.
Blatt is a man-whore.
Gordi brings The Beautiful Thing. How about this as a beautiful thing!
Triple H was recently on CBS’s morning show and hate him if you will, the guy and the company show
class: Check out the video here
Ok folks I’m out of here. Next week we’ll be bigger with every membrane and more Stephanie!
