Alternate Reality by Vin Tastic


It’s finally happening. Captain Charisma is on the cusp of superstardom. At the upcoming Vengeance pay-per-view in Las Vegas, Christian will roll the dice as he faces WWE Champion John Cena and Y2J Chris Jericho for Cena’s WWE title (bling, bling). The Peepulation awaits; we want to see Christian crowned champion. The Christian Coalition stands firmly behind the Captain. The time is right, and I for one hope it happens.

TODAY’S ISSUE: Christian’s shot at the WWE Championship

As you may have guessed, I’m a fan of Christian. More accurately, I’m a fan of Jay Reso, the performer behind Christian’s character. I like a guy who defies the cookie-cutter stereotype with which McMahon is so enamored. Reso isn’t hugely muscled, and his arsenal in the ring is based on speed and skill rather than “clubbing forearms” and one overused “power move”. Christian is his own man, and like The Chairman of the Board said, he did it his way.

Sometimes when a character is portrayed by the right wrestler at the right time, he strikes a chord with the audience. Mountains of evidence have indicated lately that the crowds dig Captain Charisma. Signs and chants in support of Christian tell the story. The Peepulation grows every day, and it’s clear the fans are ready to support Christian in a larger role, ’cause that’s how he rolls!

He’s brash and overconfident, with a distinctive look and a somewhat unique style. Christian is much more than your average hulking ‘roid freak; he has personality and charisma, hence the nickname. He offers something different than the likes of his “Problem Solver” Tyson Tomko, who embodies Vince’s prototype: big, impressive looking, and not a whole lot of athleticism.

Reso brings a lot of depth to his character. It’s easy to overdo a gimmick like his and play it way over the top. Instead, it’s almost feasible to imagine Christian acting the way he does all the time, and living like he thinks he’s a rock star. There’s just enough reality in Reso’s portrayal of Christian that you think of Christian as a real person with an overly healthy self-esteem, rather than a caricature.

Christian’s recent interplay with Ric Flair and even Vince himself on Raw have shown he’s ready to reach up to the next level. The title match at Vengeance and the draft lottery make this the ideal time for Captain Charisma to break through the glass ceiling.

The only flaw in the ointment is that Y2J has been added to the mix. I’d love for this to be a one-on-one environment, almost a coming out party for Captain Charisma. But as long as Christian wins it’ll work for me.

In fact, I don’t care if it takes 7 chair shots to Cena’s skull, 3 low blows, 5 ref bumps, Tyson Tomko’s flagrant interfering or if Jericho does all the work, as long as Christian walks out of that match at Vengeance as the new WWE Champion. Then he needs to be drafted to SmackDown immediately, bringing the title back home with him. On SmackDown, I see him feuding with Booker T again, recreating their lengthy Intercontinental Title rivalry from a while back. Also, I can visualize a natural kinship between Captain Charisma and tag team champions MNM. That foursome could comprise a new Superstar Stable. It would be good to free Christian from Tomko; I think that partnership has run its course.

Draft Lottery thoughts: Wow. John Cena, Chris Benoit, Kurt Angle and Randy Orton. It really seems like WWE is taking the draft lottery seriously this time around. I keep waiting for the Funaki and Maven drafts to happen, but Vince continues to deliver impact players. I was concerned that with Cena as the first pick, Vince might take it easy for a few weeks before switching another main-eventer, but the hits just keep on coming.

The draft itself is making for some good television while planting the seeds for intriguing feuds, high quality matches that are NOT done to death, and a fresh start for the rest of the year, and that’s precisely what the draft should do. Kudos to WWE creative. Wow, when was the last time somebody wrote THAT line?

We now return you to your regularly scheduled reality.

p.s. – I’m sure you’ve heard the advice “just act naturally”. If you’re acting you’re not being natural, are you?

Master Sergeant, United States Air Force