The NeelDown iMPACT Zone
For those wondering, the mysterious winner to the NeelDown trivia will be revealed next week. Thanks to everyone for playing.
Oh, and if you haven’t read The View From The Cheap Seats yet, get your ass over there and do it. InsidePulse-Wrestling-Columns-TVFTCS. Then, after you’re done, send feedback to TheViewFromTheCheapSeats@gmail.com, and praise Jed Shaffer, who owns you. I don’t see why you dumbf*cks are sending him hatemail. And yses, I’m too lazy to link you myself.
– The Ex-Dudleys are in the ring to start getting those insane TNA fan chants. Am I the only one who noticed the black guy spinning the t-shirts? That guy’s got to go. Anyway, they announce that the fans picked Team Canada for them to face for the titles at Against All Odds. Thankfully that happened, so we finally can have an AMW-less PPV.
Rhino v. Kenny King
Just in case you missed the Gore through the fake sheet metal cardboard wall last week, we get a replay. I’m sure it’s much more entertaining than this match will be. Rhino slugs him down and chokes into the ropes. King gets a boot off a blind charge but gets knocked down with a shoulder. King ducks a clothseline and gets a Pele Kick but it misses, Rhino gets a spinebuster then Gore. I guess that goes against all of you who say that TNA’s squashes are reasonable.
Winner: Rhino
-*
– Generation NeXt confront Larry Z, The Naturals confront Generation NeXt. They also say they are getting sidelined. Isn’t it a little ironic how TNA actually cuts promos about their own wrestlers not getting pushed? If only WWE had that same mentality. Larry Z announces a tag team tournament for the next two weeks on Impact.
AJ Styles v. Jay Lethal
Lethal gets chanted more than Styles to start. Just push the boy already. Styles lands a textbook dropkick to start sending Lethal outside. Styles goes to to do something to the outside but Lethal blocks it on the apron, which Styles then reverses into a suplex onto the apron. Pretty nice spot there. Styles has the Clash ready but Lethal blocks it by hanging onto the ropes and kicking him off, then getting a dropkick for two. Lethal ducks a kick and gets a schoolboy for two. Styles gets a double underhook into the Styles Clash for the win. That was surprisingly solid, just goes to show that if you put Lethal into a match that isn’t a squash he can excel, and working with Styles was a great way to show that. Only such a low rating because of how short it was.
Winner: AJ Styles
**1/2
In fact, let’s just see what boss Widro had to say about that match.
SuperMx123 [10:21 PM]: Hello Widro. You’ve been caught on The NeelDown iMPACT Zone Cam! What did you think of Jay Lethal versus AJ Styles? (If you’re watching Impact)
insidepulse [10:22 PM]: decent match
Don’t laugh, YOU could be caught next.
– Coach D’Amore is telling us how stupid it was to have voted Team 3D. Gail Kim comes up with the dreaded tape recorder of doom to give to D’Amore. D’Amore says that if he doesn’t get this taken care of there will be no more matches for any of Team Canada. And so the f*cking drama continues…
– Styles and Daniels get in a slap est backstage but it’s broken up.
Team Canada v. Sonjay Dutt & Chris Sabin
Dutt works over an arm bar on Petey to start, and jumps off the top for leverage and gets one. Well, so much for all that. Dutt goes kick crazy on Steak Sauce who was just tagged in but gets tripped up by Petey and he gets clothselined by Steak Sauce. Steak Sauce hangs him in the tree of woe and tags Petey in for Oh Canada. Petey whips Steak Sauce into Dutt for a corner clothseline, then gets a suplex for two. Steak Sauce drops a knee and puts Dutt back in the corner then tags in Petey who gets booted off a charge. Dutt dropkicks Steak Sauce. and makes the hot tag to Sabin who missiles Petey and headscissors Steak Sauce to the outsie. Sabin gets the tornado DDT on Williams for two after the Steak Sauce broke it up. Petey chop blocks Sabin to avoid Steak Sauce from getting the Cradle Shock and rolls him up for two. He sets up for the Destoryer but receives an enzigiri from Dutt. Steak Sauce gets dumpd again, Sabin blocks the Destroyer and gets an enzigiri then Cradle Shock for the win.
Winners: Chris Sabin & Sonjay Dutt
**3/4, not like it mattered that Petey and Steak Sauce lost in the tournament since Young and Roode already have a title shot at AAO.
LAX v. T3JX (The 3-man Job Xchange)
Apolo beats on Steele for a while then tags in Homocide who cleans house. Konan comes in for some cheap shots and Apolo lifts one of the T3JX on his shoulders so Homocide can hit a top rope bulldog.
Winners: LAX
-*, ‘nothin like a good ole Impact squash to ruin the momentum of a good show.
– The Best of Christopher Daniels is available now at “most” major retailers. That means it’s available at Best Buy and TNAwrestling.com
– Against All Odds press conference.
– Dory Funk Jr says that Jarrett holds the best title in wrestling.
– Christian Cage (representing Jeremy Lambert) says that this is the biggest match of his twelve year career.
– Jeff Jarrett (representing yours truly) says that Kevin Nash, DDP, and Rhino had nice and cute little speeches at their press conferences too.
– Jarrett talks about scaring Sting away and calls him a quitter.
– A fan wants comments on Jackie Gayda but Jarrett says no.
– Monty Brown wants a title contract.
– Christian guarentees victory at Against All Odds.
– Jarrett says he’ll send him down to mid-card where he belongs.
– The press conference turns into a Jarrett-Cage on stage brawl. Hey, that is a little more exciting than WWE’s I guess.
Roderick Strong & Austin Aries v. The Naturals
Stevens works on Aries to start with an arm wringer. Stevens gets a shoulder and hip toss. They both tag out and Douglas gets a neckbreaker on Douglas for two. Douglas with a high knee and tags in Stevens who bulldogs him into Douglas’ knee. The Naturals drop him into Aries, then back Stevens backdrops Douglas onto Generation NeXt to the outside. After some cheating Strong pins Douglas for one, then sets him in backbreaker position and Aries comes in with a leg drop for two. Strong in who chops Douglas down and gets a hip toss. Aries in who gets the pendelum elbow for two after Stevens pulled him off. Aries misses a top rope legdrop by a long shot and Stevens comes in to pummel him. Sandwhich corner whip and double team legdrop on Aries for two. They miss the Natural Disaster and Aries rolls Douglas up using the rope. That makes Sabin and Dutt against Strong and Aries next week.
Winners: Roderick Strong & Austin Aries
**1/2
– Planet Jarrett tells Alex Shelley to go get the job done and they send him off in a car. Jarrett and D’Amore argue that this plan better work and they all walk off but Erik Young, who tells the camera that “Sting isn’t gone” and that he’s worried…
End of show.
The NeelDown: Easy reccomendation for Impact this week. Solid matches up and down the card, surprisingly. In other news, catch VH1’s Web Junk 20. It’s horrible, but that’s what makes it funny.
– Have a good Super Bowl Sunday, NeelDowners. When are they finally going to make it a national holiday so I don’t have to get up early Monday morning? My prediction: Seattle Seahawks 31 Pittsburgh Steelers 17.
