So I go away for eleven days and the people finally come to their senses and kick Ace out. That of course is after Kellie stinks up the joint and puts the fear of the Pickle into her fans with her “I stunk it up” routine. Just think, it took a good performance by Ace and a real bad one by Kellie for him to get the boot.
Thanks to Josh for filling in, and check out In Hindsight for details about my trip… what, only Eric can do that?
Opening Credits.
We get a shot of Some Chick in the audience, and I’m sure Josh can fill me in on her identity. But here’s Ryan Seacrest, and he actually introduces the judges this week – Clotho, Lachesis and Atropos.
Because this week’s theme is love songs, we get a look at this week’s guest instructors, Andrea Bocelli and David Foster. They’ll be supplying comments throughout.
Katherine McPhee is told by Andrea that she could be an opera singer. Stevie Sky weeps, and the opera community is angered. She’s singing “I Have Nothing” by Whitney Houston – which was actually written by Foster.
First off, I have to say – damn Kat looks hot. With that out of the way, I’m not a huge Whitney fan, but I think Kat tried hard not to make it sound like Whitney. Pretty good control, and I think she really reached the audience tonight.
Randy – Way too big for you.
Paula – Spends 2 minutes trying not to say that she wasn’t great while saying that she wasn’t great. If that doesn’t make sense, then you know how I feel when trying to transcribe it.
Simon – By singing that song you’re saying that you’re as good as Whitney Houston. And you’re not.
Rating: 7/10
Why the song always needs to be compared to Whitney is beyond me, but whatever. Elliott is up after the
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Elliott Yamin is singing “A Song For You” by Danny Hathaway. David suggested some changes to get the audience excited. Elliott didn’t get it at first, but we’ll see how he does.
Elliott’s one of the few singers on this show who’s comfortable in front of a mic stand, and it helps him because he’s really showing some emotion just standing there. He loves this song, and it’s showing. I’m hoping that he doesn’t get booted this week, because this was a terrific performance from him.
Randy – I did not like the arrangement, but you are dope. You were the bomb tonight.
Paula – (Crying) You’ve moved me from the beginning.
Simon – Seven weeks ago I said in my opinion that you were one of the best male vocalists we’ve ever had. Tonight, in part, it was like a vocal master class.
Rating: 8/10
I think Paula’s on the meds again, but more about that after the
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Kellie Pickler doesn’t have a boyfriend, so no dedication to anyone, but she’s singing “Unchained Melody” by the Righteous Brothers, but the LeAnn Rimes cover version. David is trying to get Kellie to hit the high notes, but she’s sounding like Jordis Unga singing “Dream On”. David notes that if the song isn’t sung with passion, it can be boring. And somehow, Andrea guesses that Kellie’s a blonde.
Oh, my word. She’s worse than Ace would’ve been singing the song. Speaking of the lack of passion, well, that’s what we’ve got right here. It’s emotionless, and it’s showing on her face. And as David predicted, it’s boring as hell.
Randy – You think you butchered this one too, didn’t you? It was very strange. Wasn’t the right song.
Paula – At this point is about greatness, and I didn’t feel that from you.
Simon – It was so monotonous and so bland. There was no heart, no warmth from the vocal.
Rating: 0/10
Paris is up after the
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Paris Bennett is singing Streisand. Specifically, “The Way We Were”. Man, I hate Streisand. Andrea thinks she has an extraordinary voice.
Paris continues to amaze me with her versatility. She’s got the audience interaction down pat, and after the pain of hearing Kellie sing the fact that Paris doesn’t sound all that great is somewhat obscured. Still, a great performance, if not the best vocals ever from Paris.
Randy – I thought it was pretty good. I wasn’t blown away, but I liked it.
Paula – Best vocal tonight.
Simon – Very good vocal, a bit old fashioned for my taste.
Rating: 7/10
Good ol’ Southern boy Taylor is up after the
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Singing “Just Once” by Quincy Jones and James Ingram is Taylor Hicks David thinks that the song is a star in itself. Andrea chose the perfect song for him.
Taylor seems very tense for some reason. He’s really off key, and I’m wondering if staying still is cramping his style. He gets it together during the bridge, but I don’t think it’s enough to save the performance tonight.
Randy – I didn’t get it, it didn’t feel half as good for you.
Paula – I have no fricking clue.
Simon – You looked uptight tonight. You hear that every night, every week in hotel lounges.
Rating: 5/10
One more to go (Chris) after the
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Chris Daughtry is singing “Have You Really Loved A Woman” by Bryan Adams. Ah, Fromage de le Hoser. David and Andrea have Chris singing while lying on the floor to get him to sing properly.
The first verse has Chris staring like Marty Casey. Or a serial killer, take your pick. He of course adds his emo styings to the songs, and well, it works. The vocals aren’t the greatest (since Chris isn’t actually the greatest vocalist on the show) but he’s showing a lot of heart and emotion. Good job.
Randy – Amazing.
Paula – Love you, love you, LOVE YOU.
Simon – That was a very, very good choice of song. It was a great performance.
Rating: 7/10
Time to recap the singers, and time to start voting.
