[NFL] Pancakes In the Age of Enlightenment- Get Yourself Some Robot Pants

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Today we finish our draft recap a little later than I thought. I’ll be back next week here on the wonderful pop culture mecca that is Inside Pulse to bring you your next NFL fix.

AFC SOUTH

INDIANAPOLIS COLTS
JOSEPH ADDAI, RB, LSU (1ST ROUND, 30TH PICK)
TIM JENNINGS, CB, GEORGIA (2ND ROUND, 62ND PICK)
FREDDIE KEIAHO, LB, SAN DIEGO ST. (3RD ROUND, 94TH PICK)

Draft day trade speculation was particularly intense regarding the Colts. They couldn’t possibly actually be planning on going into 2006 with Dominic Rhodes as their feature back, could they? Perhaps a deal was in the works for an established feature back, like the Bears’ Thomas Jones. Or maybe even there was something cooking that would bring Reggie Bush to Indy to replace Edgerrin James. Oh the possibilities!

Well, as it turns out, the Colts answered the question of whether Rhodes is their guy next year not with a yes or no, but with a maybe. They drafted LSU running back Joseph Addai late in the 1st round. Addai has good size and quickness, and averaged 4.9 yards a carry in Baton Rouge last year. He probably will be given a chance to compete for the starting running back job in training camp. If somebody is going to step up and replace Edge, it looks like it will have to be somebody who has heretofore not distinguished themselves as a big time pro running back.

In round 2, the Colts drafted a munchkin corner, Tim Jennings. He’s 5-8, 181 pounds. As you might expect somebody of that stature who is still good enough to be drafted in the second round to be, he is very fast. Still, 5-8 is pretty small. He will compete with Jason David, who’s also 5-8, for a starting corner job.

Freddie Keiaho started only one season at San Diego State, but the Colts like his sideline to sideline pursuit ability, which is a necessity to play linebacker in the Tony Dungy defense. He’ll likely get broken in on special teams this year, and continue to develop into a well-rounded linebacker.

JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS
MARCEDES LEWIS, TE, UCLA (1ST ROUND, 28TH PICK)
MAURICE DREW, RB, UCLA (2ND ROUND, 60TH PICK)
CLINT INGRAM, LB, OKLAHOMA (3RD ROUND, 80TH PICK)

Are you over 6-5 and under 275 pounds? If you are, you probably got drafted as a tight end on Day 1 of this year’s draft. Big Tight Ends are like this year’s Lance Armstrong bracelets, everybody’s got one. They can’t ALL turn out to be good though, it’s just not possible. Some will wash out, and then there will be a new fad, probably failed European soccer goalies as wide receivers. Lewis did score 10 TDs as a senior at UCLA last season, so he knows how to find the end zone. He will likely see a lot of playing time this year, as the Jags other tight end, Kyle Brady, has the receiving prowess of a shopping cart.

As I mentioned in Friday’s column, the Jags’ selection of Maurice Drew in the second round probably spells the end of Fred Taylor’s injury-marred tenure in Jacksonville. The Jags will likely go into 2006 with Greg Jones and Drew as their top 2 running backs, and there is every reason to feel comfortable with that. Drew is a powerful back with a low center of gravity. He twice scored 5 TDs in a game at UCLA, and he had 13 last season. By 2007, he will be the Jaguars feature back.

Clint Ingram looks like a pro linebacker, now he just needs to play like one on a more consistent basis. The line on him is that he looked really good in spurts at Oklahoma. He has a penchant for making big plays, as indicated by his 5 interceptions last season, which is a lot for a linebacker.

TENNESSEE TITANS
VINCE YOUNG, QB, TEXAS (1ST ROUND, 3RD PICK)
LENDALE WHITE, RB, USC (2ND ROUND, 45TH PICK)

So I think you may have already heard of the two guys the Titans drafted on day one. I, personally, salute the Titans. When it comes to the NFL Draft, I like big time players who did big time things at big time schools. You can keep your Alex Smiths and your David Carrs and your Mario Williamses. Give me Vince Young and LenDale White, because I already know they can play.

Given that statement, it’s hard to say if this was a draft day home run for the Titans. It’s a pretty poorly kept secret that Jeff Fisher wanted the Titans to select Matt Leinart with the third pick. GM Floyd Reese wanted Young, and guess who won? In my world, I trust the coach over the GM. I especially trust the coach when he’s somehow managed to stay employed by the same team for over 10 years like Jeff Fisher has.

While we’re talking about Vince Young, let me pose this potentially controversial question. Why is having a running quarterback a good thing? If you want to run the ball, hand it to the running back and pick up your 4 yards. That’s what they get paid to do. What my quarterback gets paid to do is find the open man and throw it to him, and get me 7-10 yards. Byron Leftwich is boring, but his team went 12-4 last year. Warren Moon wasn’t as fun to watch as Randall Cunningham, but Warren Moon had a much more successful career.

Let’s say Michael Vick rushes for 90 yards in a game. Sean Salisbury and Chris Berman then start gushing and throwing out breathless platitudes and tell you how revolutionary he is. My question is, if Vick had chosen to pass the ball on those plays instead of tucking and running, how many yards would they have gotten on those plays? I bet you it’s more than 90. The only place a quarterback needs to move is left, right, backwards, and forwards in the pocket to avoid the rush. I don’t want a wide receiver playing linebacker, and I don’t want a running back playing quarterback.

LenDale White would have been a first round pick were it not for him being overweight at an offseason workout for scouts, and conjuring up memories of Maurice Clarett. He’s a big, powerful back who averaged 6.6 yards a carry for the Trojans last season and scored TWENTY FOUR touchdowns. He should be a nice complement to the speedy, lithe Chris Brown in the Titans’ backfield this season.

HOUSTON TEXANS
MARIO WILLIAMS, DE, NC STATE (1ST ROUND, 1ST PICK)
DEMECO RYANS, LB, ALABAMA (2ND ROUND, 33RD PICK)
CHARLES SPENCER, OT, PITT (3RD ROUND, 65TH PICK)
ERIC WINSTON, OT, MIAMI FL (3RD ROUND, 66TH PICK)

Here’s my question. If the reason David Carr sucks so much is because his offensive line is so bad, and you’ve made up your mind that you won’t be able to sign Reggie Bush without a long, protracted, embarrassing holdout, then WHY do you select a defensive end with the first overall pick, instead of taking the can’t miss offensive tackle D’Brickashaw Ferguson?

Well, I will go ahead and answer my own question. The answer is because the offensive line is an excuse for Carr’s poor play, and it has been since the franchise’s inception in 2002. Yes, maybe the offensive line is subpar, but it’s not THAT bad. They seem to run block just fine. Can it be that there is just that wide of a gap between one skill set and another? No, of course it can’t.

The truth is that most NFL GMs are proud, stubborn, men who would rather lose their jobs than admit they made a mistake.

Former Texans GM Charlie Casserly made two big mistakes. The first one, drafting Carr with the first overall pick in 2002 is forgivable, because it seemed like the right thing to do at the time. The second, giving Carr an extension when they had an opportunity to cut him loose and pick any one of THREE quarterbacks who were among the first top 11 picks in this draft, is not forgivable. By doing that, Casserly painted himself into a corner of having a number one pick when the obvious number one pick was a player that did not fit any of his team’s many glaring needs.

Now Casserly has resigned, and his parting gift to the team was Mario Williams. Williams may well develop into a very good player, but in the grand scheme of things, is he really going to change the direction of this terrible franchise? Probably not, unless he can find a way to average 15-20 sacks a season, or somehow propel the Texans 24th ranked pass defense into the league’s top 5.

The Texans did use two third round picks on their offensive line. Which, by the way, is how you get a bad offensive line in the first place, by filling it with third round draft picks.

DeMeco Ryans was a nice pick in the second round. He’s a fast, versatile linebacker, which is something the Texans need more of if they are going to be successful in their switch to a 4-3 defense.

AND THE WINNER IS..
I like what the Jaguars did. They continue to upgrade their offense, and if they can get all the young talent they have on that side of the ball to mature while the defense is still as good as it is now, then they’re going to be in really good shape. Drew could be their feature back for the rest of the decade, and Lewis gives them another highly athletic receiver to complement last year’s first round selection, Matt Jones.

AFC WEST

DENVER BRONCOS
JAY CUTLER, QB, VANDERBILT (1ST ROUND, 11TH PICK)
TONY SCHEFFLER, TE, W. MICHIGAN (2ND ROUND, 61ST PICK)

Alright here’s the thing about the Broncos’ selection of Jay Cutler with the 11th pick in the draft. They were one game away from the Super Bowl last year, a game they lost at home. You don’t get any closer than that. In my mind, I draft somebody who is going to help me win that one game that you didn’t win the year before. Unless Jay Cutler is really, REALLY good at holding a clipboard, he’s not that guy.

He may be the quarterback of the future for this team, but you also have to take into account that the future is now for the Broncos. Especially after making a draft day deal for former Packers wideout Javon Walker. Cutler may well turn out to be a very good player for a very long time, but I’m just saying, the Broncos gave up 35 points in that AFC Championship game last year, and there were a lot of good defensive players still on the board at that 11th pick. But they traded up specifically so they could draft Cutler, and they got him, so good luck with that, hope he keeps up the stellar tradition of Vanderbilt alums blossoming into NFL stars. I don’t know, Cutler just kind of smells like a draft-day figment of Mel Kiper’s imagination to me. There have been a lot of them at the quarterback position. I could be wrong. I could be right. May the road rise to meet you.

Scheffler is another big tight end. So beeeg, so strooong. If you want to read comments on him, go find what I wrote about one of the other 37 6-5 and over tight ends who were drafted, they’re all pretty much the same. Every team has to have one now, and now the Broncos have theirs.

KANSAS CITY CHIEFS
TAMBA HALI, DE, PENN STATE (1ST ROUND, 20TH PICK)
BERNARD POLLARD, S, PURDUE (2ND ROUND, 54TH PICK)
BRODIE CROYLE, QB, ALABAMA (3RD ROUND, 85TH PICK)

Tamba Hali comes from the hell on earth of the West African nation of Liberia, and has been fighting hard to save his mother by bringing her to the United States. He’s also an accomplished pass rusher, something the Chiefs desperately need. He’s got a great deal of speed but scouts are concerned that he may be too small to be a great pro pass rusher. The Chiefs drafted him to play the John Abraham role in new coach Herm Edwards’ defense. For the Chiefs to get a guy with better character they would have had to draft Bono, or Pope John Paul II. Let’s root for him to succeed.

Bernard Pollard instantly gives the docile Chiefs’ defense a mean streak. He’s a big, physical safety whose strong suit is stopping the run. He might be a little slow to cover Antonio Gates, which he’d have to do twice a year as a starting safety (which he may not be just yet this year), but in a division that has 2 of the best running backs in the league, you need somebody in the secondary who can provide extra support against the run, and Pollard can do that.

Now that his special super best friend Dick Vermeil is gone, it will be interesting to see if the leash tightens on Trent Green this season. He’s only led the Chiefs to the playoffs once in what seems like 20 years as their starting quarterback, despite having a Hall of Fame running back (Priest Holmes), a Hall of Fame tight end (Tony Gonzalez), and a Hall of Fame offensive tackle (Willie Roaf) on offense with him for most of that time. Brodie Croyle was drafted in the third round and looks to be the heir apparent to Green. He’s got a strong arm but a slight build. He leaves Alabama holding just about every passing record there is to hold there, which is impressive when you consider that Joe Willie Namath played there too. He also has never tried to kiss Suzy Kolber.

SAN DIEGO CHARGERS
ANTONIO CROMARTIE, CB, FLORIDA ST. (1ST ROUND, 19TH PICK)
MARCUS MCNEILL, OT, AUBURN (2ND ROUND, 50TH PICK)
CHARLIE WHITEHURST, QB, CLEMSON (3RD ROUND, 81ST PICK)

The Chargers defense ranked 20th in the league in yards per pass attempt last season, despite having a high first round pick (Quentin Jammer), and a second round pick (Drayton Florence) as its starting corners. The selection of Antonio Cromartie with the 19th overall pick sends a message that both of their starting jobs are in jeopardy. Cro missed the 2005 season with a knee injury, but he’s a 6-3 corner who runs like a 5-8 corner. The fact that he still went in the first round despite not playing at all last season due to a serious injury should tell you everything you need to know about how good most scouts think this guy is.

The hits kept on coming in the second round for SD, when the Chargers landed a 6 foot 9 offensive tackle from Auburn, Marcus McNeill. He’s huge and plays with quickness, and is a steal as a second round pick. He could develop into an anchor at left tackle for the Chargers.

Charlie Whitehurst threw 18 TDs and 27 interceptions combined in his junior and senior years at Clemson. And he is good why? I guess because he’s big and looks like a quarterback. But if you can’t play, you can’t play. Quarterbacks don’t generally get better at not throwing interceptions in the pros than they were in college.

OAKLAND RAIDERS
MICHAEL HUFF, S, TEXAS (1ST ROUND, 7TH PICK)
THOMAS HOWARD, LB, UTEP (2ND ROUND, 38TH PICK)
PAUL MCQUISTAN, OT, WEBER ST. (3RD ROUND, 69TH PICK)

Michael Huff is the kind of secondary prospect coaches drool over. He has the size and speed to play either corner or safety, and play either position well. He’s also a smart player, and served as the quarterback of the National Champions defense last season. He most likely will step in immediately as a starter in 2006, and is a much needed addition to a secondary that was a big reason why the Raiders ranked 25th in yards per pass attempt last season despite having the AFC’s leading sackman in Derrick Burgess.

The Raiders have a very undistinguished group of linebackers, and hope that second round pick Thomas Howard can be the first building block towards changing that. Howard is a very fast, athletic linebacker who is made to order for his position’s responsibilities in a Cover 2 scheme. He’s a little on the raw side though. He likely will get on the job training as a starter this season, and learn along with the rest of a young Raiders defense.

Paul McQuistan is a raw athlete who probably will need a couple of seasons to refine his technique before he’s ready to play. He’s got a ton of speed and quickness for an offensive lineman, and a lot of strength. He’s a guy who’s stock shot up at the combine, but we’ll see how that translates to an NFL playing field.

AND THE WINNER IS..
Just about anyone else who can tell a pigskin from a sheepskin will tell you the Broncos had the best draft in the AFC West. I’m not going to do that. Javon Walker was good in Green Bay, but there’s a long list of receivers who were good in Green Bay but sucked anywhere else. Brett Favre has a way of making receivers look better than they are. As for Cutler, like I said, the Broncos need to make the Super Bowl this year, Cutler probably doesn’t help them there.

I like the Chargers draft. Antonio Cromartie has the tools to be a great corner, and in the second round they got a huge offensive tackle with great upside. They’re both guys who will probably help them this year, and maybe even vault them ahead of the Broncos in the AFC West.

THAT’S A WRAP
Okay then, that’s the draft! I’m getting on a plane to go on vacation to sunny Orlando, FL this morning, so there won’t be a long goodbye this week.

Read Patrick, he battle rapped against David Stern last week.