Time for another week of the audition process (I guess Burnett told them that “interview process” was a Trump thing) known as Rock Star. Here’s Brooke Burke, and tonight she’s apparently gotten the memo to not be unfashionably behind the times like the wife of the CBS boss. Here’s the “band”, and of course Dave Navarro.
And before we go any further you MUST read this article about Marty Casey, who tells us that people didn’t actually come to see INXS, they wanted to see the Lovehammers (who opened for INXS). Way to stay humble, Marty.
Reality Segment – Magni’s wife and kid arrive, and Dilana gets “Won’t Get Fooled Again” which the singers were told would have Gilby on guitar.
The “band” is shocked that noone else wanted to take the song. I think the truth is that everyone was too afraid to challenge Dilana. But anyways, let’s get right to it as Dilana and Gilby perform The Who’s “Won’t Get Fooled Again” and like last week, the fact that it’s the theme song for a CBS show is NOT mentioned. I actually thought that this was perhaps Dilana’s weakest performance, but still, not a bad performance, and I’ll take a poor Dilana performance over ones by Josh/Zayra/Jill/Patrice any day.
Dave tells Dilana that her performance didn’t seem like an audition – it was like a rock show. And now the other singers not only have to follow Dilana, but Dilana and Gilby. Big whoop. Gilby now has no doubt that a woman can be Supernova’s lead singer, which I’m sure is wonderful news for the women in the competition – I mean, now they’re not competing for second place anymore. Jason thinks that this song belongs on the list of “Rock Star” moments.
Speaking of following Dilana here’s Avril Lavigne Jill Gioia, and she’s singing “Mother Mother” by Tracy Bonham. It’s a great song by the way – provided that Jill Gioia isn’t singing it. There’s supposed to be this bipolar thing going on where Tracy’s all calm and then explodes into this raging ball, and I didn’t see it with Jill until the end.
Dave thinks that Jill is a singing Carmela Soprano. Tommy says it was her best performance so far (although I’d argue that singing Heart last week was). Jason basically says that she gassed because she was running around so much.
Our next song is “Paint it Black” by the Rolling Stones and somewhere in the theatre is Ryan Star. He’s dressed all in black (not unusual for him) but his hoodie seems to have stolen Ron Wood’s hair. And when he doffs the hood he’s got black across his eyes, and he apparently decided to SHAVE. And on top of that he gives a great performance. Over the past two weeks Ryan’s gone from afterthought to contender. Who’d a thunk it?
Dave wonders what happened to Ryan. Tommy thinks it was interesting and Dave says that Tommy knows that it was the s#!+. Tommy has an epiphany and realizes that Ryan got some after last week. And for some reason we focus in on Zayra.
Storm Large again keeps things a little on the mellower side, as she sings “We Are the Champions” by Queen. And as this is Storm, the performance is awesome. And Gilby didn’t think that Storm or Dilana couldn’t front the band before tonight?
Dave and the “band” are all over Storm with praise. Well, not literally, but you know they wouldn’t mind. Tommy does worry that they’ve scared Storm out of rocking out some songs, but Storm promises to spank the crap out of them. Tommy may now require a cold shower.
Following Storm is Zayra Alvarez and she’s singing David Bowie’s “All the Young Dudes”. Magni’s helping her out by playing guitar. Also helping Zayra out is a gold… thing that I last saw being worn by Meggan in Marvel’s “Excalibur” comic (the original, not the current one). Check it out:
Anyways, I’ve no idea what to make of this performance. Between Zayra and Steffi D, I’ve had enough of bad versions of Bowie songs. Dave says that if the show were called Rock Star: Planet Pluto, Zayra would win. Gilby likes her showmanship. The singing? Not so much.
Now, singing “Interstate Love Song” by Stone Temple Pilots is Josh Logan… but wait! Tommy wants to play drums with Josh. And because Josh is not an idiot, he says “yeah, sure”. Or maybe he is, because his performance is about the same as the rest of his performances (smirk, head bob, “soulfulness”). It doesn’t help that he’s anchored to one spot because he’s playing guitar.
Dave thinks that Josh is good, but “good” might not be enough in this competition. Gilby is pleased that Josh chose a rock song. Because Nirvana wasn’t a rock song? I dunno. I think they just need to sing Josh’s praises because Tommy was playing behind him, but all I saw were two guys doing their own thing.
After getting that emotional lift (and perhaps some practice during Zayra’s performance) Magni‘s going it alone with his acoustic guitar singing “The Dolphin’s Cry”, and the lighting actually makes him look a bit like Ed Kowalcyk (it helps that both of them shave their heads). By doing so, Magni shows off his voice, but instead of being all Idol-like, it really just shows that he can hit all those little nuances that make for a great lead singer.
Dave gives Magni props for being the first person to stand up there and do the song alone (he forgot about Ryan, but technically he was sitting).
Now singing “Instant Karma” by John Lennon is Patrice Pike. It’s a “safe” song, but Patrice does some little things that we didn’t see Josh do during his performance, such as moving the mic stand around the stage (even though she, too, was playing guitar). I’m not sure why they keep throwing songs that are marginally rock into the mix, but anyways it’s a decent performance, and compared to Josh should help to keep her safe.
Dave likes Patrice’s song choice – it suits her voice. Gilby likes that she’s changing it up.
Lucas Rossi is trying to bounce back from last week’s debacle by singing Radiohead’s “Creep” (FCC-friendly version). And he bounces back in a big way. He starts off with quiet intensity, and keeps building to a giant crescendo where he lets it all out. I think we might finally see Lucas on stage on Wednesday – doing the encore.
Tommy got goosebumps. Dave wonders where this Lucas has been, and Jason says “that’s what I’ve been talking about with your voice”.
Tonight’s final singer is Toby Rand, and he’s singing “Burning Down the House” by Talking Heads. It’s a great performance, although I wasn’t sure about using the megaphone (with an Australian flag draped over it. Aussie! Aussie! Aussie! Oy! Oy! Oy!) Lots of energy, good vocals, let’s see what the “band” has to say.
Dave doesn’t like the megaphone – he’s not a big fan of gimmicks. Remember, this comes from a guy who joined a band that used to perform wearing only tube socks. Jason and Gilby aren’t as harsh – in fact they kinda like it if used sparingly.
That’s it for the performances (and I’m shocked that there were no Nirvana songs), and the voting window opens.
Brooke reveals the results of the first few minutes of the vote, and the bottom three (so far) are Jill, Zayra and Patrice. Maybe we’ll actually get to see Zayra in that tube top again. The results show… tomorrow.
