— Not much to say as one of the most ridiculous things EVER to come on wrestling since David Arquette won the WCW title happened tonight. And just to think, I could be watching Matt Leinart make his Monday night debut instead of this.
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Los Angeles CA.
Hosts: Jerry “The King” Lawler & Jim Ross
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– Spirit Squad vs. Cryme Tyme
We finally get the debut of the new “thug” team WWE has been trying to promote to the moon lately. But hey, I guess it’s worked as the new team has gotten national publicity before they even debuted. JTG (?) starts off the match against Johnny and gets hit hard, but pulls of a nice reversal from a double suplex, getting both men from the SS down.
Tag goes into the big man from Cryme Tyme as he cleans house and elbows Mikey, setting up a fireman’s suplex combined by clothesline from JTG to get the win.
— Winner: Cryme Tyme
– Intercontinental Title: Chris Masters vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Super Crazy vs. Jeff Hardy
We have a free for all match here and somehow Masters is in a title match. Benjamin and Crazy spill outside as Hardy and Masters stays in the ring, with Masters overpowering Jeff. On the outside, Benjamin throws some hard headbutts to Crazy to throw him back in the ring. Hardy manages to get Masters, but Crazy throws Jeff out of the ring. Back inside, Shelton pulls up on Masters in the corner, with Crazy jumping on top of Benjamin which leads to a HUGE double superplex as all three men go to the ground.
Back from the break, Masters hits a standing vertical suplex on Hardy, which is followed up by a cover from Benjamin for two! Twist of fate is attempted but blocked from Masters which gives Shelton time to hit a HUGE super kick on the back tracking Hardy. Crazy back in, but the Masters locks the master lock, with Benjamin flying out from no where to break up the hold. Hardy back in to clean out the ring and hits the whisper in the wind over Shelton for two! Masters is down and Swanton Bomb ends the match.
— Winner: Jeff Hardy
– Carlito vs. Rob Conway
As I sit here wondering how this show can get any worse, we have a former La Res member on Raw. Oy, complete squash, back cracker/breaker wins.
— Winner: Carlito
– Steve- O & Chris Pontius vs. Umaga
Another squash match as Umaga is the monster of RAW. I wonder if this should have been in the Jackass movie?
— Winner: Umaga
– Maria vs. Candice Michelle vs. Victoria vs. Torrie
Bra and panties match as we have the usual T&A to determine who advances in the women’s title tournament. So in other words, this will be the weak link of the final four. My RAW Events representative takes the win.
— Winner: Maria
– Randy Orton w/ Edge vs. HHH w/ HBK
HHH starts off the match going strong as he tosses Orton out of the ring, who lands awkwardly and we head quickly to break. Back in and there isn’t much movement from Orton, however it has the momentum over HHH. A few right hands later and HHH hits the knee lift to the face, sending Orton sprawling to the corner.
Pedigree is attempted, but blocked and reverses the move as both men fall. RKO is attempted but blocked into a spine buster. Lita distracts the ref and Edge hits the low shot on HHH. Steel chair in the ring, but HBK hits the low blow and HHH nails Orton with the ssstteeeeelll chair to pick up the win.
— Winner: HHH
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— We start the show off with DX- err, Orton and Edge making their way out dressed as DX. With Edge putting in lots of details, wearing a huge plastic nose as they go on with the DX parody. Cue the real DX music as HHH and HBK walk down the ramp and get their heat back. Orton gets upset and challenges HHH to a one-on-one match as HHH accepts giving DX the signal to clear the ring.
— King Booker and Big Show meet up backstage until Coach breaks up the argument as Vince shows up. But Cena isn’t there, so he can make the huge announcement regarding the three champions.
— Nitro and Melina make their way out, pronouncing that they have a very special guest tonight. And its Kevin Federline- ok I give up, I really do. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?! Whatever happens next I really don’t care.
— Cena, Booker, and Show are all out in the ring as Vince makes the champion of champions match an interactive one for Cyber Sunday as we fans get to vote which title will be on the line at the PPV. Don’t really care as that last stupid segment completely killed the show for me. And we CONTINUE the stupid Federline thing on wrestling. DAMN, they really do want me to stop watching this show don’t they!?!?!
— Edge meets up with Vince backstage who wants another ground breaking match at Cyber Sunday regarding DX. Edge wants the fans to choose who the special guest referee will be in their match against DX. Names brought up: Coach, Eric Bischoff, and Vince?
— Steve-O and Chris Pontius from Jackass 2 run into the ring from the crowd and want to fight. So cue Umaga and AAE.
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– Danny Wallace has your live RAW report tonight.
– I like movies”¦ and common, who doesn’t?
– I think this fight was better than RAW tonight.
– The Monday Night Football Update: Bears- 10 Cardinals- 23 4th quarter
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The Inside Pulse
I would have rated this show a whole lot lower, but the fatal four way IC match was the only savior of this show. Seriously, I just really didnt care for that whole K-Fed segment and I was actually a little embarrassed watching that part. And I have a lot riding fantasy wise in the Monday Night Football game, so the game gets the nod over the show tonight.
